


Adventure Mode

by ShanaRHager



Category: Super Smash Brothers
Genre: Action/Adventure, Don't miss the ending, Epic, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Loyalty, Melee Era, Novelization, Sequel, perseverance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-14
Updated: 2017-02-14
Packaged: 2018-09-24 07:22:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 58,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9710897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShanaRHager/pseuds/ShanaRHager
Summary: Sequel to 1P Mode.  The twelve Smashers are back for Melee, along with a few newcomers.  But one of these newcomers just so happens to be King Koopa, and one of his favorite things to do is push Luigi around!  But after the big, bad turtle verbally decimates him after beating him in a match, Luigi says "enough" and takes on the brand-new Adventure Mode to put him in his place.  With his friends behind him, he's likely to do it.





	1. Start

_Previously…_

            “Did you really win against Master Hand?” asked Ness, the boy from Onett.  “He’s a tough opponent!”

            Luigi, the Eternal Understudy, nodded.  “Once you put your mind to something, you’re likely to do it,” he said, smiling.

            “Some of us used to take you at face value,” sighed Fox, remembering the tier list tacked up on the board and how he and a certain racer took potshots at the man in green for being ranked last, “but we never will again.  Cross our hearts.”

            “I’m going to hold you to that,” Luigi told him, punctuating the sentence with a smoldering look.

            Meanwhile, in an undisclosed location, Master Hand, the Hand of Creation, was discussing his duel with Luigi with a suave-looking gentleman in a suit.

            “The time has come to stop underestimating him,” he was saying.  “I believe that after all these years, a little—reparation—is in order.”

            “And what exactly do you have in mind?” asked the man.

            “How about—a free mansion?” suggested Master Hand.

            “Free mansion, you say?”

            “But there’s a catch.  He’ll have to go on an adventure first,” continued MH.

            “Ah, I see.  You want me to put Luigi in his very own game.  But—what should be the objective?”

            “Luigi loves Mario more than anyone else,” said MH.  “Let’s have him venture through this mansion to rescue his big brother.  And not just any mansion—make it a haunted one.”

            “So—what exactly do you need from me?” asked the man.

            MH leaned forward.  “I’m talking about a business proposition.  I help you make this Luigi game happen, and you help me work all of the kinks out of the second tournament I plan to hold in two years, which includes fixing the problems which currently hinder Luigi.  That’s the deal, and it’s not subject to negotiation.  Understood?”

            The man shook MH’s hand.  “You’ve got yourself a deal.”

 

_Two years later…_

            The year was 2001.  Bush was President.  The nation was struggling to recover from a devastating terrorist attack on its own soil.  Windows XP was the new OS du jour, and Wikipedia made its debut.  American Online and Time Warner merged to form AOL Time Warner.  _Pearl Harbor_ made audiences cry in theaters, while _Shrek_ and _Monsters, Inc._ made theatergoers laugh.  “Lizzie McGuire”, “Crossing Jordan”, “The Ellen Show”, “Samurai Jack” and “The Fairly OddParents” were TV’s newest shows.  The GameCube succeeded the N64.  And two years after the inaugural tournament, Nintendo’s best characters were once again squaring off in—Super Smash Bros Melee!

            Along with the returning Forever Twelve, there were thirteen new faces, all of which were welcomed with open arms.  From two Princesses to two new swordsmen to two nefarious villains, this roster promised to be spicier than the first!

            In the men’s locker room, one of the returnees stood before a mirror, applying a thick layer of shaving cream to his cheeks, chin and neck.  The strong smell of the stuff permeated the air as he glided a Gillette razor down one cheek, across the chin, up the other cheek and then down the slope of his neck, leaving his moustache be.  He trailed a gloved finger over the freshly shaved skin and found it nice and smooth, just the way he liked it.  On came a few pats of aftershave, and then he cleaned his shaving materials.

            He pulled on his freshly cleaned clothes.  First a pair of briefs.  Then, an emerald green shirt.  A pair of navy overalls with brown buttons.  Peppermint-striped socks.  And finally a pair of shined brown work boots.  And a sports watch, just because.

            A comb and brush tamed his brown hair and styled it in the usual way.  Atop the hair now rested a green cap with its signature L, arranged at a smart angle.  To complete the primping, he took a bottle of cologne and directed two quick sprays to the back of his neck.

            Luigi strolled over to the full-length mirror and studied himself.  He rolled his shoulders back, lifted his chin and straightened his posture.  He studied his blue eyes, observing his reflection with just the right amount of intensity.  The movements of his chest and abdomen as he breathed.  Tensing on the inhale and relaxing on the exhale.  He tried all sorts of expressions on his expressive face.  Smiles, neutral expressions, solemn expressions and finally fierce looks of concentration, determination and confidence.  Once he was finished, he nodded proudly to himself.

            Inside and out, he felt good.  Only a month ago, he’d saved Mario from the King of all Boos and soldiered through his fear of ghosts.  His standing in this tournament had considerably improved, given his advantageous wavedash brought on by his bad traction.  He’d finally started to gain the respect he deserved—his bravery won him the favor of a certain blue-haired prince.  Plus, old friends had been invited to show their skills, one of them being a peachy Princess who wanted to demonstrate her ability to rescue herself.

            Very carefully, Luigi peered back at his reflection.  His jaw tightened, the rest of his face tightened and a deep red color began to replace his suntan.  Gloved fists clenched, and his breath came fast.  Twin thunderclouds emerged in his blue, dilating eyes, and his nostrils flared slightly.  And two words flashed across his mind.

            _That turtle_.

            King Koopa, the bane of his and Mario’s existence for the past sixteen years, had also come along for the tournaments.  He thought he was everything, with his loud, obnoxious mouth and his condescending attitude, teaming with Ganon to make everyone else miserable.  He was so big and strong and mighty, and everyone had to answer to him, or else.  Well, it seemed that everyone wanted to take a number and get in line to trounce him in battle.  He was among the most unlikable characters in Melee.  And for Luigi, the feeling was multiplied by twenty.

            Want to know Koopa’s nicknames for Luigi?  Green ’Stache.  Or Greenie.  Or Green Bean.  Take your pick.  But never his real name.  Koopa never took him as seriously as Mario.  He always found ways to treat him like a joke.

            Like in a recent match between them on the Battlefield stage.  Luigi took the match seriously and pounded his massive opponent with everything he had, but Koopa creamed him, to put it lightly.  Adding insult to injury, Koopa mercilessly taunted the vanquished plumber after he was awarded the victor’s spoils.  Luigi had wanted to beat him senseless, but instead he walked away, eventually winding up in the new and improved Training Area, where the newly created Sandbags awaited to help the fighters train.  With the door closed and locked, Luigi unleashed his frustration on the first Sandbag he saw.

            Koopa’s words to him that day was something you’d never forget, even after several weeks.  And that was why Luigi was here, slowly bringing himself back from his anger, preparing to go on another action-packed adventure—Adventure Mode!

            As soon as Master Hand announced the new mode, Luigi signed up and spent the last few days conditioning body and mind.  Now, today was the day, and he was ready.  Ready to tackle Adventure Mode head-on and ready to make Koopa eat his words.  Successfully, he calmed himself down and beamed one last time at his reflection.

            “Luigi!” called Master Hand’s voice.  “It’s time!”

            The beaming smile was replaced with a stony, battle-ready expression.

            “ _Sono pronto_.”


	2. 1-1: MK: Reach the Flagpole

            Master Hand warped Luigi to a very familiar course.  World 1-1 of his home universe, the start of a quest which usually ended with great big hoopla for Mario and very little for Luigi.  At least Peach kissed him on the cheek or nose.  The man in green blinked that thought away and focused on the level at hand.

            “You must clear this course within seven minutes to advance to Part 2 of this stage,” said Master Hand.  “Halfway through, you will battle a team of 10 lightweight but aggressive opponents.  Are you ready?”

            Luigi took a deep breath.  “Yes, I am.”

            “Good luck, L,” sang out MH as he floated away.

            READY…GO!

            Luigi hit the course at a full sprint.  It was lovely weather for an adventure—nice and warm, with a light breeze to prevent it from getting too hot.  There were the familiar bricks and “?” blocks which sometimes yielded items, and not just Mushrooms, either.  Goombas, Koopa Troopas and Koopa Paratroopas rushed to impede him, but Luigi knew how to defeat them.  He didn’t have to lay a Smash attack on them if he didn’t want to—he subdued them the classic way—by hopping on them.  He’d take the shell of a KT or a KPT and kick it into crowds of his longtime enemies.  Or, he’d use his fireballs to prevent taking unnecessary damage.  His high jumps vaulted him up platforms which took him to the second portion of the course.

            After a while, Luigi reached a platform with a Super Mushroom symbol on it, at which point the stage became locked.  A Toad marked the checkpoint by racing back and forth.  Remembering MH’s words, Luigi put up his dukes, ready for a fight.

            “Yoshi!”

            Luigi looked up and smiled.  He remembered facing the Yoshi Team two years ago during his trek through 1P Mode.  Though their ranks decreased slightly, they were more aggressive than last time.  Clearly, this was no time for fooling around.

            As the Yoshi Team descended on him, Luigi launched into the fray at once.  He dodged sticky tongues, headbutts, rapid flutter kicks, eggs and Ground Pounds.  Green fireballs weaved lazily through the air, hitting this Yoshi and that Yoshi.  He lit into the dinosaurs’ flanks with his punches, roundhouse kicks and new attacks.  This time around, he was further differentiated from Mario.  His strong up was now an overhead swipe, and his strong down was a low heel kick.  His forward air stung like a bee as a fierce karate chop.  His forward smash was one of his most favorite moves, nicknamed the Trowel Stab.  And the introduction of side specials introduced another purely Weegee move—the volatile Green Missile!

            But more on that later.

            A few Cyclone attacks cleared the remaining Yoshi Team from the area, allowing Luigi to continue on.  He was hardly even breaking a sweat.  A few more groups of enemies awaited them, which the man in green fended off quickly.  There were also trophies scattered about the area, which he snagged.  Now he was starting to feel as if he was actually venturing through World 1-1, with a few twists here and there.

            And with the relative ease of the course, Luigi began to think, to remember…

            _It was a highly anticipated, five-stock match on the Battlefield, drawing a full house.  The tension was so thick that you could cut it with a knife, if you’ll pardon the cliché.  On one side stood Luigi, clad in his Wrecking Crew colors, one outfit which really brought out the nostalgia.  The slight, golden hue on his skin stood out against the soft pink of his shirt and the deep crimson of his overalls.  He cut a striking figure against the ambience of the stage, blue eyes sparkling, facial expression intense as he stared down his opponent._

_Said opponent waited on the other side, smirking at Luigi.  His claws, horns and spines winked dully in contrast to the glow surrounding his foe.  Amusement colored his eyes beneath his bushy, red brows.  King Koopa had waited for this moment for a very long time, and he knew that Mario was watching.  Defeating his green bean brother right in front of him would surely break his archenemy!_

_The designated official directed the two fighters to approach each other at the center.  He went through the whole rigmarole of wanting a clean fight—as if that was possible.  At the end of the brief speech, Luigi drilled his stare into Koopa as he held out his hand.  Rolling his eyes, Koopa shook it._

_“Good thing you brought you brother with you, Greenie,” the hulking reptile chuckled, “so you can cry on his shoulder after I win!”_

_Luigi said nothing, determined not to react.  He could feel something ignite deep inside of him.  Blue fire ignited in his eyes, and his jaw muscles tensed as he awaited the countdown._

_**Wait and see, you turtle.  Wait and see…**_

            Powerfully, Luigi smashed a few of the bricks overhead with his fist, startling a few enemies.  Wildly flailing his fists, he charged into them, knocking them every which way.  He attacked the last group of enemies more aggressively than when the level started, seeking to push the memories away.  Ahead, he noticed the finishing point flagpole with another Toad running back and forth.  Dashing in, Luigi tagged the pole, replacing the black Koopa flag with a green flag with an L on it.

            COMPLETE!

            He closed his eyes, willing the last of his anger to ebb.  _Don’t worry, L.  You’ll get your chance.  But for now, just try to focus._

            “You okay?” came MH’s voice.

            “Yeah.  I’m fine,” replied Luigi.

            “Good.  You may now proceed to Part 2 of this stage, a battle against two opponents you know quite well.”

            “Let’s-a go,” Luigi said quietly.


	3. 1-1: MK: Mario and Peach

            Mario “Jumpman” Mario adjusted his signature red cap for the umpteenth time as he waited for his younger brother to show up.  Beside him was the beautiful Princess Peach Toadstool, clad in her pink dress, her blonde hair brushing her shoulders.  They stood atop the roof of the latter’s castle, which consisted of three towers.  The central tower was an especially handy tool in a heated battle, as it could set up an infinite combo.  The couple had already strategized how they could trap Luigi between them and that structure.

            “Don’t worry,” said Peach.  “He’ll be here soon.  I just saw him defeat the Yoshi Team.  And besides, the geography of the course is familiar to him.”

            Mario smiled.  “Okeydokey.”

            “Were you really teamed with a Luigi clone two years ago?” questioned Peach, raising an eyebrow.

            “Yep,” sighed Mario.  “Worst mistake I ever made.  Should’ve known he was a fake.”  He changed the subject.  “Princess, do you think he’s gonna be okay?  I mean, after he fought Koopa…”

            “I know,” Peach said softly.  “I know.”

            Mario’s brow furrowed lightly as he flashed back to that fateful day…

_Luigi had fought hard, even harder than him during their usual final battles.  He’d used his fast speed, long wavedash, ability to chain-grab and his brand-new, hard-hitting attacks and had exploited Koopa’s slow speed, poor mobility and low jump height—but he’d still lost, and lost badly.  Afterward, Mario had spied Koopa talking to Luigi.  He was too far away to hear what was being said, but he could tell by the way his baby brother’s jaw locked, his fists balled at his sides, the muscles and veins in his neck rolled and the icy, searing glare on his face that Koopa was rubbing the loss in his face.  Once the turtle lumbered off, chuckling, Luigi wheeled around and headed briskly for the Training Area.  Mario had followed him, but when he heard the door slam and lock, he understood that Luigi needed some time alone.  It took most of the day for the green-clad plumber to cool off.  During dinnertime, Mario cooked his baby bro’s favorite pasta, and they talked about the incident.  By the time the dishes were cleared away, Luigi felt better, if only a little.  The Bros then claimed the Training Area, sparring until it was time for lights out._

            “He hasn’t spoken to Koopa since it all went down, and rightfully so,” said Mario.  “I keep hoping that he eats crow and apologizes, but that’s not likely to happen.”

            “But you know something?” piped up Peach.  “Since that day, Luigi’s worked harder than ever.  It’s like—he knows that overgrown turtle is wrong.  And he’s preparing and waiting for the chance to finally prove him wrong.  Look—here he comes now!”

            “Yahoo!” shouted Luigi as he hopped onto the roof of the castle, ready for battle.

            “Hey, Lu!” Peach and Mario greeted as one.

            “Hello, Mario.  Princess,” Luigi greeted back.

            “How was it?” asked Mario.

            Luigi shrugged.  “Déjà vu, if you ask me.”

            Peach straightened her shoulders.  “Do your best against us, but remember to have some fun and enjoy our company, okay?”

            “Okay.”

            The three exchanged handshakes and then positioned their fighting stances.  Luigi slowed his breathing as his eyes flicked between his brother and the Princess.

            READY…GO!

            As one, Peach and Mario rushed their opponent.  Luigi snapped into action with a Cyclone and quickly took the offensive.  He went for Mario first, clobbering him with his overhand punches which chained into themselves and ending the combo with his heel kick and a quick power kick.  Peach raced into the fray, her frying pan, golf club and tennis racket at the ready.  Her opponent dodged some of the swings, but she managed to connect several times with the painful frying pan and send him flying with her golf club.  Luigi scrambled up and flicked some fireballs at the Princess, turning his attention back to his recovering brother.  Peach just stood back and let the Bros duke.  Watching them go at it like two titans had the appeal of a thrill ride.  They were powerhouse fighters, even more so now that Luigi had leveled the playing field.  From the beginning, they’d been classified as all-arounds, easy to play, easy for gamers to sink their teeth into.  In Team Battles, their chemistry set any stage ablaze.  Against each other, their love and respect for the other sibling really bubbled out.  Those hours sparring together paid off and should be taken into consideration to understand their explosive meetings on the battlefield.  Determined looks were exchanged as they continued to volley blows and Smash attacks back and forth, their energetic shouts bouncing off the castle towers.  With swishes of his Cape, Mario could send Luigi stumbling into one such tower, which he then used to blast away at his little bro.  With a little bit of luck, Luigi could propel himself with full force into Mario, sometimes even misfiring.  As the moniker “Trowel Stab” suggested, Luigi bent his elbow, wound himself up and launched his open hand into his opponent, knocking him away diagonally.  He could also change the angle of this attack; the same could be said for his strong side attack.  But Mario’s forward smash was just as cool.  Winding up with his hands cupped near his chest, he lunged forward, unleashing a mighty blast of fire from his palm.  He’d also relieve Luigi of a few coins using his jumping uppercut attack.  No matter; Luigi paid him back when he got in close and executed the same attack, with a more—fiery—effect.

            Two years earlier, the Bros had battled it out on a similar stage when Luigi was pitted against Mario and his false self.  Yoshi had been his teammate, but the man in green had focused entirely on his brother while Yoshi dealt with the clone.  Engaging in close combat with Mario was cathartic to Luigi, in a strange way.  It reminded him that despite their similarities, Luigi had certain distinctions which made him stand out and possibly increased his chances of victory.  And while they loved each other deeply, these were the moments when the _other side_ of their relationship began to come out—the combustible, competitive side.  Luigi had finally notched a solo adventure under his belt, but Mario still received more credit in saving the Princess.  And recently, at a Power Tennis tournament, the Bros squared off against one another in the finals.  That summery afternoon saw one of the tensest final matches in its history.  And after a long, hard and sweaty game, Luigi had won.  He’d accepted his trophy with pride, relishing in the audience’s cheers for him, not Mario.  But as the red-capped brother in question walked over, intending to be a good sportsman and congratulate Luigi—something happened.  Somehow, as Mario clapped Luigi on the shoulder, he’d stepped on his foot.  The action ignited brief controversy, though Mario swore it was an accident.  But a group seeking to discredit Mario reported seeing the man in red _laughing_ as he ground his shoe into Luigi’s foot.  As for Luigi himself, he was mildly cool towards his big bro as the Melee tournament began.  Thanks to some one-on-ones Master Hand arranged between the plumbers, Luigi was finally beginning to work past that incident.

            Even now, in the throes of Adventure Mode, performing chain-grabs and combos on Mario, their bodies close as fists, feet, open hands, fireballs and more thudded into them, Luigi couldn’t help but think about it.  Was it really an accident?  Or was it a little hissy-fit from a salty older brother?  It was, after all, the first time Luigi had beaten Mario at tennis.  But during doubles, they were teamed together, and their strategy and chemistry propelled them to a final victory over their Princesses.  Luigi was more confused than anything.  One of these days, he was going to sit Mario down and have a nice chat with him over this.

            Peach rested on the other side of the roof, examining her Parasol.  With Luigi distracted, she could slip in and help her man double-team their foe.  That would be so much fun!  She smacked the Parasol in her palm a few times, suddenly wondering how easily it could penetrate the rough hide of a certain stubborn kidnapper.

            The Mushroom Princess bit her lip, so hard that tiny drops of blood poked through her soft, pink lips.  Her grip tightened on the Parasol, her hands sweating beneath her luxurious gloves.  That princess-snatching meanie had the gall to badmouth a respected resident of her domain—in front of her and Mario, no less!  The sight of him bestowing a crushing, humiliating defeat upon the green plumber was seared into her memory.  She’d seen Mario rush down there to provide comfort once the awards ceremony was over and done and quickly followed him.  Her plumber didn’t hear what Koopa had said to Luigi.  _She_ did.

            Then, she snapped herself back to the present, doing one last check on her Parasol and then inspecting her frying pan, tennis racket, golf club and Toad counterattack.  She could pull Veggies from the ground, even coming up with Beam Swords, Mr. Saturns and Bob-ombs!  Observing the Bros in fierce hand-to-hand, Peach reasoned that she could initiate a two-on-one by hurling a Veggie at him and then going full force while he was distracted.  It had worked well with other adventurers.

            Her eyes were now fixed on Luigi as he sought to wrest the advantage from Mario, and her mind started to drift…

_He was so handsome, standing there on that stage, straight and tall and never flinching, staring down the formidable, fearsome appearance of his opponent.  His eyes were cold, practically screaming “Come at me, bro!” to the giant turtle.  Instead of his usual green, he wore pink, a homage to his years manning a Wrecking Crew.  The soft, warm color was a counterbalance to the passionate energy obviously circulating inside of him as he waited for the countdown, unfazed by Koopa’s sneer as he looked at him down the length of his nose.  Peach was so ready for that obnoxious reptile to be put in his place!_

_But fate was cruel that day, and the villain had triumphed for once in his life.  He made sure to remind Luigi of that and to lay it on thick that Mario and Peach saw the whole thing._

_“Look at the way I pummeled you, Green ’Stache,” the diabolical king had laughed as he forced Luigi to watch the replay.  “Look at me absolutely destroying you—look at how sad, weak and pitiful you are.  You really think you’re so useful to your dear brother if you can’t even beat me on your own?  You’re nothing but a simpering, pipsqueak second banana, now let’s see those tears.  GWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAA!”_

_More words were said, and yet Luigi hadn’t shed a single tear.  Koopa wasn’t worth a cry.  Instead, he’d walked away from his opponent and stalked over to the Training Area, where he remained for most of the day and a few hours that night after dinner.  During the latter, Mario had joined in.  And for days after, Luigi threw himself harder into his matches, giving it his all and visibly improving.  Peach was itching to witness a rematch.  She couldn’t wait to see the look on her enemy’s face then._

            A Veggie was now in her hand.  Silently, Peach sneaked up on Luigi, still fully engaged with Mario.  Once she was an appropriate distance from him, she curled back her arm and let the Veggie fly.  Luigi gave a startled exclamation as the Veggie bopped him on the back.

            He whirled.  “Princess!”

            “Forgot about me?” Peach asked jokingly before doing her Peach Bomber attack, popping Luigi high into the air.

            “Well played, Peachy,” cooed Mario.

            Peach nodded.  “Let’s do this, Mario.”

            Luigi had barely gotten back up when Mario grabbed him and threw him toward Peach.  She “served” him back to her beau using her tennis racket, and from there, the duo had a team combo going.  They made sure to bounce him off the central tower a few times for good measure.  Peach had her Parasol at the ready, either to help her recover, to prevent Luigi from counterattacking her or just to inflict some more hurt.  Some of her attacks, such as her aerials, had magical effects to them, and her Toad was on hand to spray out some spores when the going got tough.  She twirled a ribbon round her body for her up smash, and then spun around in her dress for her down smash.  With these whimsical moves, she could really help the rubber-legged, brawler-based Mario.

            But—

            Luigi was like no other opponent they ever faced before.  With a shout, he escaped the team combo, his Green Missile colliding with Mario, and then nailed Peach with his breakdance sweep.  She slammed her frying pan into his face, and it wasn’t long before a skirmish erupted between them.  At first, Luigi settled for quick, light blows against the Princess, but when she fought more aggressively, so did he.  He engaged her till they were both working up a sweat, and after Peach attacked with her Parasol, he grasped her, swung her around three times and then let go.  She found herself clinging to the ledge, and before she could pull herself back up, Luigi bashfully kicked the ground, meteor-smashing and defeating her.

            He spun around and focused back on Mario, releasing more and more of the tension he’d carried with him recently.  The elder was baiting the younger silly with his Cape and his nefarious forward air, nicknamed “the Plunger”.  Luigi would always air dodge in time and try to edgeguard if Mario tried to plunge him off the stage.  Now that they had the roof to themselves, they pressed one another from one end of the stage to the other, making great use of the turrets.  Luigi sent Mario stumbling using his sissy fists and followed up with a good roundhouse spinning kick, and Mario responded with several Tornado attacks.  They grabbed and threw one another with excellent power.  Mario made sure to keep his skills top-notch in the last two years, but so did Luigi.  After an attempt to K.O. Mario with the Super Jump Punch failed, Luigi flung him off stage as hard as he could, jumped over and executed a downwards twirl kick, aiming so that his opponent was right at his hip, allowing him to meteor smash his older brother.

            GAME!

            “This concludes the first stage of Adventure Mode,” Master Hand’s voice spoke to him.  “For the second stage, things are about to get a little—creepy.”

            Luigi tasted the sweat which dripped onto his lip.  “Thanks for the heads-up,” he said.

            What could possibly be creepier than a haunted mansion?

 


	4. 2-1: Underground Maze

            The labyrinth was dim, but light enough for Luigi to see.  He inhaled the earthy scent of a sublevel locale, coolness surrounding him.  There was only one place he’d been before which was this dark, and that was his “free” mansion.  He heard echoes and occasional drips of water.  Hopefully, he’d encounter no brother-snatching ghosts or Boos around here.

            “So,” he said casually.  “What exactly is my goal here?”

            “To find the Triforce,” boomed Master Hand’s voice, “and it’s not as easy as it looks.  The Triforce is in one of six rooms in the Underground Maze.  In the other five wait a surprise!”

            “Link never told me about Underground Mazes in his universe,” muttered Luigi.  “Okeydokey, then.  Let’s have some fun.”

            READY…GO!

            During his trek, Luigi quickly found out that the Underground Maze was unlike his and Mario’s usual side-scrolling adventures.  It was a large, non-linear course which easily disoriented him more than once.  Some areas were darker and cooler than others, and around him, an atmospheric cover of the Temple theme played.  Of course, the inhabitants of the Underground Maze were ready to “greet” their visitor.  ReDeads were spooky, scary skeleton-like creatures which didn’t send shivers up Luigi’s spine; rather, they latched onto him like blood-sucking leeches and took a big chomp out of him.  They smelled like rotting flesh, and their eyes seared into him through sunken sockets.  Yet Luigi would regain his wits after a few seconds and fight back.  Once he freed himself from the chilly grasps of the ReDeads, he attacked with fully-charged Trowel Stabs, power kicks or a combination of both, first knocking them down and finally finishing them with a strong strike.  Octoroks, as their moniker implied, shot rocks at Luigi, dealing heavy damage.  He’d put up his shield and deflect the rocks back at them, or he’d dodge the rocks, grab them and throw them off the maze and into each other.  Personally, Luigi preferred throwing them.  Like Likes were slow, tube-shaped creatures who were hungry for a certain green-capped Italian plumber and enjoyed swallowing him whole, racking up some hurt and spitting him back out.  Being inside one of these monsters was akin to being inside a sewer—except that the stench and darkness were worse!  Luigi easily defeated them by kicking them away—sometimes striking other enemies in the process.  He continued to dash, jump and flip his way through the Underground Maze, even tangling with a lava-ridden area!  Just when he thought things couldn’t get any more unique, he stumbled into a polygon-shaped room with a Master Sword in the center.  Could this be the room carrying the Triforce?

            All of a sudden, his surroundings went completely dark, and he was confronted with Link, the Hero of Time and his compadre in green.  So, this was the surprise Master Hand was talking about.

            Link took in his opponent, covered in bloody bite-marks, large bruises and Like-Like slime, panting for breath and slightly cross.

            “Hey, you okay?” asked Link.

            “Oh!  I—I’m okay, Link,” Luigi replied, smiling at one of his close friends in Smash.  He allowed himself to recall their encounter atop Hyrule Castle two years ago, his first battle in 1P Mode.  Link had thrown himself into their confrontation, his Master Sword stinging sharply, but Luigi’s blows eventually won the day.  Now, neither man in green would expect anything less from the other.

            Link drew his sword, flourished dramatically and waited as Luigi raised his fists, jaw set.

            “Come on,” whispered Luigi.

            “Hyaah!”  With his trademark high-pitched cry, Link attacked.  Luigi dodged and deflected the Master Sword before aggressively turning the tide with his Trowel Stab.  Link’s breath left him in a rush as he doubled over, his face meeting crushing punches and karate chops.  He straightened, leaped away and fired some arrows at his opponent, followed by a few bombs.  Luigi was a nimble dodger, but he couldn’t dodge all of the projectiles.  Arrows nicked him and bomb blasts launched him.  Link could sometimes read Luigi and punish severely.  But Luigi could read Link just as well, forcing him to stall while holding a lit bomb, aiming strikes at the arms and sides and popping him up with his breakdance sweep to meet him with a headbutt on the way down.  Link had been among the first recipients of Luigi’s new forward smash, and the succeeding times didn’t hurt less.  It was considered one of the strongest forward smashes in the tournament, and the majority of the roster could testify to that.

            Luigi would make sure each Trowel Stab was felt to the maximum, angling his hand slightly upward to accomplish this.  He’d use Link’s windedness to follow up with more hard-hitting blows, getting in a few Super Jump Punches before the elf pulled himself back together.  His blond hair fell in his face as he sliced and hacked at his opponent, hitting and missing, testing out his brand-new Gale Boomerang which could pull foes toward him.  But just like the last time, Luigi was a hard man to beat.  Link looked at the other man’s handsome face and saw something disquieting in his eyes.  Was it anger?  Hatred?  Who was he upset at?  Did he have an argument with someone?

            Lately, Luigi hadn’t been the same.  Overall, his fighting style had become noticeably more aggressive.  He still hung around with his friends, but there were days when Link would come across Luigi sitting alone, silent tears streaming down his face.  The plumber would admit to moments of feeling worthless and weak.  And most of all, whenever a certain spiked turtle was in the room, Luigi’s hands would clench into fists, and his eyes would snap as he stared heatedly at his and Mario’s lifelong enemy.

            _Link was on his way to the lounge to relax after a training session when Koopa stopped him.  “Hey, Elfie!” he crowed._

_“Okay, first of all, don’t ever call me Elfie,” snapped Link.  “Second of all, to what do I owe this pleasure?”_

_“Oh, nothing, except to tell you how much fun I had out there!” laughed Koopa.  “The friends you make, you pointy-eared elf boy, are laughable!  Tell me—did you enjoy seeing me reduce that green ’stache to a pulp?”_

_Link’s face filled with fury.  “Don’t ever speak of my comrade that way!” he growled, brandishing the Master Sword._

_“Aw, are you gonna throw a tantrum over how I hurt his feelings?” cooed Koopa.  “I bet he’s crying a river in his room right now, so why don’t you head there while I go about my business?”_

_“Yeah?  I think I’ll do that,” Link shot back, “but you know what?  This conversation isn’t over.”_

_He sheathed the Master Sword and stormed away._

            What was wrong with Koopa?  Was he always such an unpleasant person to be around?  It was bad enough that he’d trounced Luigi that day?  Why did he have to rub it in for days after, making Luigi feel like he was useless and that he couldn’t do anything right?  The injuries from that match were long since gone, but the scars from his words—not so much.  They remained in his blue orbs and in everything he did.

            Now, it was Luigi’s turn to shout, jolting Link back to the present, smashing his jaw, his chin and peppering him with short-hop karate chops, flying kicks and overhand swipe attacks.  His throws had gained strength in between tournaments, with two additional throws consisting of throwing the opponent into the air or slamming them onto the ground.  Sometimes, the unlucky person would bounce back up, enabling Luigi to just chain grab them.  Then, there were Luigi’s B moves.  His Cyclone was a rain of punches all over Link’s body.  His Green Missile had a 1 in 8 chance of misfiring and causing more agony.  His sweet-spotted Super Jump Punch garnered the nickname “Shoryuken”, after a similar move in the Street Fighter franchise, sometimes called a “Weegee Shoryuken” to distinguish the two.  Link was now at the mercy of a very strong, all-around fighter, perhaps better than Mario.

            But I digress.

            Link gained some breathing room with his Spin Attack and bombs before going back on the offensive.  His “Hyaah!” and “Hyet!” mixed with Luigi’s forceful and sharp interjections as they battled it out in the mysterious room.  Both were heavily damaged and nearly spent when Luigi bent his elbow and speared his hand into Link’s waist, gaining the win.

            The victorious man in green took a Heart Container and continued on his way.

            More ReDeads, more Octoroks, more Like-Likes.  Valuable trophies tantalized him along the way.  Luigi vaulted from platform to platform and from room to room, searching for the Tri-Force.  But in the next four rooms he came across, only Link waited for him.  Four more times, Luigi eagerly dueled the Hero of Time, taking the blonde elf aback with the gusto he showed.  With each battle, the younger Mario Bro grew more—passionate.  Was this frustration?  Adrenaline?  A desire to prove something?  He couldn’t stop Koopa’s jeers from replaying in his mind again and again, a mocking song.  But he didn’t cry or pity himself.  He focused his feelings inward and converted them into energy.  He could handle someone like Koopa.  He’d be so full of himself that he’d push Master Hand for a rematch.  And Luigi was patiently awaiting that day.

            _How he laughed at him with those beastly eyes as they faced each other down, trying to end the match before it began, but all in vain.  Pure, pounding adrenaline zipped through Luigi as he opened his attack with a few fireballs, catching Koopa off guard.  The reptile was expecting a reckless charge, you know, so Luigi had to trip him up before going for him.  And go for him he did!  Koopa’s snout and jaws were subject to brutal punches, karate chops and Trowel Stabs, as were his underbelly and neck.  He grabbed him by the tail and swung him around before launching him with a grunt.  He slammed him to the floor repeatedly and caused devastation with his downward corkscrew kick, which could meteor-smash, neutral air and all of his specials.  Luigi was doing great, but he dared not let it get to his head.  His opponent was ferocious and unpredictable.  He’d trap him with his Koopa Klaw, and then viciously bombard him with his claws and make him bleed.  Koopa was slow but mighty, most of his blows causing dangerous knock-back.  He could head-butt, kick and attack with his shell as well as make clawed fists and punch, and the way he threw people around like ragdolls led to salty moments aplenty.  He also let loose with his fiery breath, but Luigi shielded, waited till it sputtered out and flicked forward some more fireballs before resuming his merciless assault.  The green-clad man felt Mario and Peach’s eyes on him.  They were rooting for him, encouraging him.  And for their sake, he wasn’t about to lose!_

            He forced himself out of the flashback before he could get the turning point, the loss and the words, punching a ReDead straight in the face and then slamming it hard onto the floor.  It bounced up and hit the low ceiling and rammed into a Like-Like, defeating them both.  He hopped onto some more platforms, destroying more enemies as he went, searching for the sixth and final room.

            Hordes of ReDeads, Octoroks and Like Likes.  Five Links.  The echoes of sneers and words.  The Temple Theme.  Luigi, bathed in sweat, closed his eyes to clear his mind before stepping into the last room.  And there, majestic and glistening, was the Triforce!

            COMPLETE!

            Luigi sat down beside the Triforce, staring into space.

            “Wasn’t that fun?” asked MH.

            “Nothing but a party, getting chomped on by ReDeads, swallowed by Like Likes and fired upon by Octoroks,” deadpanned Luigi.  “What’s next?”

            “I’m taking you to the Temple,” said MH.  “A familiar face is eager to see you there.”

            Luigi stood back up and rolled his shoulders.  Part of him hoped it was Ganondorf.  He honestly couldn’t wait to give the Gerudo King a piece of his mind.

                


	5. 2-2: Zelda and Sheik

            Zelda, the wise Princess of Hyrule and the bearer of the Triforce of Wisdom, knelt in prayer atop the Temple stage.  She wore her usual carnation pink dress, and her blond hair was in two braids down her back.  The wind swished around her; otherwise, she was in complete solitude, psyching herself up for a grueling fight.

            When Link, down in the Underground Maze, told her that the adventurer was about to clear the level, Zelda had gone to the Temple to make the necessary arrangements.  She’d practiced her teleporting skills and familiarized herself with the areas on the stage where she could trap her foe in an infinite combo.  Temple was infamous for its size as well as the various bodying opportunities.  The Hylian Princess smirked as she recalled the bouts which took place here and how she used her knowledge of the geography to win.  She’d owned so many opponents here, mostly as the “other her”.  The “other her” was nimbler and packed more of a punch with her attacks.  She brought the “other her” into play during extreme emergencies.  _Whoever_ she was, this Princess brought on the pain with many a Smasher on this stage.  _That_ would show those foolish gamers how to make a tier list!

            Marth.  Fox.  Douglas.  Pikachu.  Ganondorf.  Koopa.  Those were just some of the poor, unfortunate souls who faced Zelda’s wrath on the Temple.  This stage was condemned as “the stage of broken friendship” and had long since been banned from serious tournament play—with good reason.  But when someone wanted to go on an adventure, this stage was open to all of the Smashers.

            The heat rose to Zelda’s face, and she clenched the fabric of her dress in her gloved fists.  Koopa.  Just the mere mention of his name could send anyone into a rage these days.  A full house had seen what he did to Luigi that day, and the majority of the Smashers heard his words to the man in green afterward.  There was no Facebook or Twitter back then, but the news spread quickly throughout the Smash Mansion that the King of Koopas had verbally decimated Mario’s little brother after cruelly defeating him in a five-stock battle.  Koopa had spent weeks afterward bragging to everybody, especially Luigi’s friends, including Link— _her_ Link!  She’d come across the turtle celebrating with Ganon, as if what he’d done was a major accomplishment.  The Gerudo King was perfect for Koopa because they were both callous and selfish villains!  They left a boatload of misery in their wake!  Zelda had hoped that one day, she’d respect those two despite their reputations.  Humph!  Fat chance!

            Her body remained kneeling on the Temple, but her mind was transported not far into the past…

            _“Link?” she gasped, seeing her elf approach her, a frantic look on his face._

_“Zel, thank Farore!” Link half-sobbed, throwing his arms around her.  “I could use your wisdom right now!”_

_“What’s wrong?” she asked.  “Link, look at me.  What’s going on?”_

_“Something bad just happened to Luigi!” Link cried out.  “Koopa—he—he…”_

_Zelda nodded somberly.  She’d sat next to Peach, watching in horror as the turtle got the drop on Luigi.  Up till then, everyone was predicting victory for the plumber.  Koopa’s shortcomings, including his slow, low jumps, slow speed (sacrificed for strength) and susceptibility to chain-grabs and combos by faster and lighter characters, had made him a sitting duck for Luigi’s in-your-face fighting technique he’d perfected over time.  The overgrown turtle was vulnerable to infinite grabs, and Luigi just so happened to know how to pull them off.  Grabbing him, slamming him down, attacking and then grabbing him again.  Launching offensives at lightning speed, fast, furious and fierce.  Sissy fists.  Trowel Stabs.  Breakdance sweeps.  Karate chops.  Twirl kicks.  Meteor smashes.  Throws.  Combos.  Specials.  They popped out of the man in green like popcorn.  He’d been acutely focused on winning, maybe because of their history as rivals, or perhaps something else.  His blood had started boiling after a while, shouts ripping from his lungs like news from the headlines.  The battle was surprisingly close, for even though King Koopa was slow, he could be pretty powerful._

_What Zelda hadn’t counted on was Koopa suddenly taking one of his opponent’s stocks.  And it all had gone downhill from there._

_“I know Luigi was a little bummed out afterward,” she said to Link, returning to the present.  “Is he all right?”_

_“No,” said Link.  “Koopa said THINGS to Luigi.  Terrible, horrible things.”_

_Zelda stopped breathing.  “Like what?” she demanded sharply._

_“I don’t know!  I could only see that turtle’s lips moving and the disdainful SNEER on his lips and his EYES—oh, Farore, the way his eyes shot contempt at Luigi and—and Luigi’s face…”_

_“Link,” Zelda cut him off.  “I need you to take a deep breath and relax, and then I want you to go to Master Hand.  Tell him what you saw.  I’m sure he’ll straighten stuff out.”_

_Link nodded, tears in his eyes.  “I love you, Zel,” he said._

_“You, too,” replied Zelda, kissing him lightly.  “Now go.  And hurry.”_

            “Whatever MH did, it sure didn’t faze Koopa,” Zelda muttered to herself.

            “You’re right,” replied a familiar, accented voice.

            Zelda whirled.  “Luigi!  I didn’t see you!”

            The man in green walked toward her.  “To be honest with you, I was hoping to face Ganondorf,” he confessed.

            “Yeah?”

            “Yep.  He intimidates me a little bit, but I’ve been aching to take a few shots at him, if you know what I mean.”

            Zelda shrugged.  “Well, I want him to stop trying to take over Hyrule, but we can’t get everything we want,” she said wisely.  “Ready to fight?”

            “Whenever you are,” Luigi calmly replied.

            They shook hands and got into their fighting stances.

            READY…GO!

            Anticipating Luigi’s charge, Zelda sent out Din’s Fire at him.  While he was distracted by the flames, she dashed in with her magical attacks and kicks, teleporting to other areas of the stage to frustrate him.  With her Teleport move, she lured him to the unpopular area of the Temple and used her magic to combo him six ways to Sunday.  But Luigi had just trekked through a maze of ReDeads, Octoroks and Like Likes and fought Link five times, and he wasn’t going to put up with _this_!  He escaped and had her in a pummel before she could say “Nayru’s Love”.  After slamming her down, he proceeded to give her a taste of her own medicine, combo-ing her all over the stage until she had enough and Teleported to safety.  He threw some fireballs at her, which were quickly reflected by Nayru’s Love and retaliated with the longer-ranged Din’s Fire.  Zelda smoothed out her dress and fixed her hair as Luigi hopped up the platforms toward her.

            “Come get me!” she challenged, baiting him.

            Luigi streamed out a breath and did just that.  Her magic surged into him, and her heeled shoes could meteor him into the ground.  But her magical attacks were relatively weak, though long-ranged, and his smashes had high knock-back values attached to them, his Trowel Stab in particular.  Before she could Teleport, he’d grab and throw her.  Magic, fire, kicks and punches flew between the plumber and the princess, her high-pitched yells mingling with his forceful shouts.  They took advantage of the huge size of the Temple to hard-press each other, with Zelda Teleporting here and there in quick succession and Luigi using his high jumps and his side-B to traverse platforms.  There was this lonely, low platform, directly below the main platform, which they found themselves on more than once.  Furiously, they’d vie for that spot, for the right to chain-grab and set up painful infinites.  These clashes usually culminated in aggravating stalemates which could only be broken by one throwing the other.

            Zelda’s blood was pumping, and her body ached.  Playtime was over for her and Luigi.  Deciding that the time was right, she transformed in a swirl of sparkles into Sheik, the brilliant ninja and the last of the Sheikah tribe.

            Sheik was clad in a blue and gray fighting suit, her face covered by a veil.  Her hair was pulled back into a single braid.  Simple, just the way she liked it.  The look in her eyes was severe and set as she sent out her nimble strikes at Luigi.  Her opponent, thankful for something substantial to work with, answered her strikes hungrily.  Instead of magic, Sheik threw piercing needles at her foe and attacked with a chain.  Her version of Teleporting consisted of explosions, but she used the move less frequently.

            From here on in, the battle became more grounded, the focus moving away from infinite combos and toward landing a K.O.  Sheik seemed to be everywhere at once, battering Luigi.  Her movements were breathtaking, in every sense of the word.  But Luigi’s reflexes were sharp the last time he checked, and he managed to punch the ninja out of thin air, racking up damage before she escaped and retaliated more savagely than ever.  She surprised him with her throws and stunned him with her needles.  Fireballs stopped her quick feet in their tracks, his heel kicks tripped her and his straight roundhouse kicks pushed her away slightly, allowing him to breathe a little.  He used his strong up attack, which chained into itself and juggled as well as his forward air.  Mixing strong attacks with air attacks, he could set the scene for relentless Smash attacks.

            Sheik was one of the most flexible fighters on the roster, twisting herself into impossible positions to escape her opponent’s onslaught.  But Luigi demonstrated his own flexibility along with his brawn.  Who else could swing his legs 360 degrees like he did?  Who else could poke out his hand like a viper into the most vulnerable areas on a person’s body?  Who else could follow Sheik’s fluid motions with his eyes, lashing out at all the right moments?  The ninja was stunned over how her opponent could keep up.

            _His grace under pressure was admirable, too, turning many a Smasher green_ (snicker) _with envy.  Nobody knew what he’d throw at them next, not even the all-powerful Koopa King.  From her place inside Zelda’s mind, Sheik had observed that fateful battle from start to finish.  She listened to the way every claw strike, kick, slam or shell spin was answered with a mighty blow, the sounds of Luigi’s wild wavedashing, the blast of fire breath, the sounds of roaring and interjecting and the slam of a massive body striking the floor over and over.  She caught the infrequent hitches in Luigi’s breathing, his blistering and almost angry yells and his exclamations of pain.  More than once, she looked through Zelda’s eyes and saw him, darting in and pounding his opponent senseless, darting back out to evade a counterattack, sweating and bleeding, face flushed with exertion and emotion.  Speed was on his side here, and Sheik knew that he knew.  But when the cheering, chanting, whistling and hooting turned into disbelieved and devastated gasps, cries and screams, Sheik knew that something was wrong._

_She had been half-conscious of Link saying something to Zelda.  Something about Koopa taking his bragging too far.  Link had sounded upset, too.  Sheik had called out to Zelda to rush to Luigi’s room on the double, to comfort him and be his sounding board and make everything okay again.  But Luigi had spent the rest of the day in the Training Room, the locked door unable to drown out his voice as he pummeled Sandbags.  He’d come out in time for dinner, making small talk with his friends, before heading back in, this time with Mario._

_Nowadays, she’d pay Luigi visits whenever she could.  She gave him advice, let him vent and played her lyre for him.  But she knew he was still upset over whatever had happened between him and Koopa.  She used her stealthy ways to try and find out what.  No dice there, but if she_ did _know something of the situation, she knew this—Koopa had better watch that glass house of his!_

            After dealing out a series of blows to the legs, Sheik lashed out with her chain at her discombobulated foe.  But Luigi rolled to his feet and speared his hand at her arm, causing her to drop the chain.  He grabbed her, threw her into the air and laid into her one last time with repeated bicycle kicks, ending with his mighty uppercut.

            Sheik hollered as she was Star K.O’d.

            SUCCESS!

            “After such a convoluted stage, I say it’s time for some simplicity,” boomed Master Hand’s voice.

            “I couldn’t have said that better,” said Luigi.

           


	6. 3-1: Kongo Jungle and Tiny DKs

Luigi heard the distant rushing of waterfalls as he stood on the new and improved Kongo Jungle stage. A series of platforms constructed from logs and suspended by vines made for an interesting battle. Clouds scattered over the sky, and the peppy DK Rap was currently playing over the sound system.

Standing in front of him were two DKs, miniature size. In unison, they faced the audience and shrugged before turning their attention back to Luigi. He crouched down so that he was eye level with the mini Kongs and held out his hand. Each mini Kong grasped his pointer and middle finger for a modified handshake.

“These two may look easy, but they’re hard to keep in range of your attacks,” warned Master Hand. “Start with light blows first.”

“Okeydokey,” said Luigi.

The mini Kongs stood side by side, ready to fight.

READY…GO!

At once, the two tiny DKs leaped at Luigi, who heeded MH’s advice and advanced with strong attacks, rather than Smash attacks. He clobbered them repeatedly with his strong up and popped them away with his strong side. As they tried to recover, Luigi bounded after them, unleashing his karate chops. He snatched one tiny DK out of thin air and flung him forward and nailed the other with a jump kick. He continued to throw his bite-sized opponents into platforms and into each other. They swung themselves onto the higher levels to swat at their opponent, but their hits did pitifully little damage. Luigi had become a bit of a whirlwind, punching here, kicking there and chopping everywhere. He resisted the temptation to use a forward smash, knowing that it was likely to be futile. His less powerful moves were doing well enough against these two, anyway. There was very little expanding going on, if you know what I mean.

**_He's the leader of the bunch; you know him well._ **

**_He’s finally back to kick some tail!_ **

**_His coconut gun can fire in spurts;_ **

**_If he shoots ya, then it’s gonna hurt!_ **

**_He’s bigger, faster and stronger, too!_ **

**_He’s the first member of the DK Crew!_ **

**_DK! Donkey Kong!_ **

**_DK! Donkey Kong is here_!**

As one tiny Do—I mean, Kong—lunged toward the man in green, Luigi intercepted the charge with a straight forwards kick. Tiny DK number one tumbled off the stage and beyond the blast line. For the remaining Tiny DK, Luigi put him in a Fence of Pain using his forward air, forcing him out of the stage boundaries. Luigi had beat the two tiny apes with barely a scratch.

SUCCESS!

“Yeah—I made those two Kongs tiny on purpose,” confessed Master Hand.

“Why?”

“The next phase of this stage is considerably harder. And your next opponent—is an old friend.”

_I hope it’s Koopa. God, I hope it’s that foul mouthed turtle who said that I couldn’t fight worth a—_

“Not him, silly!” chided Master Hand. “Perhaps you recall a certain stage in 1P Mode in which you and two allies fought a massive opponent? Well, this time, you’re on your own.”

Luigi sucked in his breath. “There can only be one,” he murmured.

 

 


	7. 3-2: Jungle Japes and Giant DK

He couldn’t breathe. His chest tightened up, pain coursing through his lungs. Gasps forced his way from his mouth as his hands curled into fists. Blue eyes knifed into his opponent as they stood on Jungle Japes, two wooden platforms above a swirling river. A catchy swing tune came in hard over the sound system—a counterpart to the mood currently permeating the air. He had some clue as to the identity of his next opponent, but it was quite different from seeing said opponent in the flesh.

Luigi remembered Giant DK quite well. There was no love lost between those two. The man in green could still hear the impact of the Giant Punch against Mario, followed by the heartrending scream. He could still see the grin on GDK’s face as he watched Mario fall outside the stage. And as the memory of that first battle against GDK commenced to replay in his head, Koopa’s biting words provided a macabre soundtrack.

_“What kind of sidekick are you, anyway? All you do is tremble like a leaf and blubber about how you want to go home. And whenever some baddie menaces you, you wail for your big brother to save you. You honestly expect to defend him and the Princess if you’re not even man enough to fight on your own?”_

That was a low blow. When Mario was KO’d by GDK, Luigi had felt like he let his brother down. Like there was something he could’ve done to prevent it. He’d easily suppressed those feelings, but Koopa’s little rant had brought them roaring back. That turtle had said things that made him feel like he wasn’t trying his hardest during the normal rescue missions, like he was a liability, rather than a resource. It put a bitter, acidic taste in his mouth. GDK probably thought he’d forgotten, but, oh, no. A sibling never forgot things like that.

“L? Is everything all right?” asked MH’s voice.

“Yeah,” Luigi managed.

“You look like something’s bothering you,” said MH

“I just have an old score to settle,” explained Luigi.

A feverish feeling emerged within him as he stepped briskly toward GDK. “Remember me?”

GDK just shrugged.

“Well, I remember you. And I remember what you did to Mario. How you _hurt_ him right in front of me. But today, you have only me to face. You’re really not gonna enjoy it.”

Luigi shook GDK’s pointer finger and positioned his fighting stance. His emotions put him at an egregious disadvantage. He kept his eyes on GDK as he did a breathing exercise, feeling the memories stopping and his anger cooling down and hearing Koopa’s voice mute inside his brain.

“I’ll show you both,” he whispered.

READY…GO!

Luigi went into action right away with a series of karate chops to GDK’s face. He then went into his down aerial, meteor smashing the beast and then following him to the ground. GDK pulled himself up and swung his giant fists at Luigi, but he dodged and fiercely knifed his hand at him, aiming for the abdomen, ribcage and chest. Once he hit GDK where it really hurt, Luigi grabbed him, slammed him to the floor and whacked him with his overhead punch before repeating. He’d add a kick if he saw GDK trying to counterattack so he could escape if possible. He could breathe easily again, though sweat painted his brow and dripped off his nose, chin and earlobes. His brow was furrowed lightly with concentration, but that was the only emotion present on his face—that and excitement. He’d always dreamed of the chance to face GDK again, to pay him back for his job on Mario. So far, he hadn’t sustained any serious injuries, since GDK’s increased size and power came at the cost of speed, as was the case for all of the heavyweights in Melee. But he couldn’t get cocky. Nor could he let emotion take over again.

There was a big gap in between the two platforms, where only the rushing river waited. Luigi gazed at it and was now struck with an idea. If he could get GDK to fall into that gap, then he’d win. He’d read his opponent’s attempts to recover and send him right back down. With a strategy firmly in place, Luigi licked his lips once and then again, his eyes searching the giant ape. GDK grinned and barreled at him, but Luigi sidestepped, grabbed him, spun him thrice and flung him away. Immediately, GDK used Spinning Kong, but Luigi was waiting for him at the edge, throwing fireballs, and met him with a forward smash. GDK was sent reeling, and Luigi dashed after him, bombarding him with sissy fists, and used one of his throws to start a combo. To finish, he hurled GDK back toward the gap, mentally calculating the time frame he had before GDK tried to recover and did a short hop followed by his downward twirl kick. Unfortunately, GDK was about a fraction of an inch away from Luigi’s hip, so he didn’t get the meteor smash. And GDK wasn’t stupid—he was starting to figure out what the man in green was up to.

GDK sliced into Luigi with his Spinning Kong, and once they were back on the stage, propelled his giant fists into him. He swiped, clapped, swatted, clobbered and created shockwaves by pounding on the ground. Luigi rolled to safety and shot fireballs to end the assault, swallowing back the rising frustration. Redness crept up his neck as he clenched and then unclenched his hands, his eyes cold. He was going to show this darn, dirty ape that he was no pushover!

He breathed deeply as he intercepted GDK’s next charge, the ape swatting at him and missing. Luigi went back on the offensive by chaining his overhand punches into each other, and then grabbing and slamming him again and again. He remembered that he wanted GDK falling downward, so he angled his Trowel Stab so that he could accomplish this. GDK tried putting up his shield, but Luigi could always grab him out of it and stun him with a down throw before firing off more knifehand thrusts. Though GDK managed to get some Giant Punches in, as well as some more brutish strikes, it was clear that he couldn’t get back on top. Luigi would try and try again till he finally succeeded. And he finally _did_ succeed. After raining down enough strong attacks on GDK, Luigi seized him in a bruising grip, pummeled him, swung him around a few times and then hurled him with the power he had left. Timing things very carefully now, Luigi executed a full hop, and once he saw his opponent exactly at hip height, he landed his corkscrew kick. GDK plummeted helplessly into the swirling waters below, the rapids sucking him off the stage.

SUCCESS!

Luigi wiped his face and neck, glaring down at the rapids. “Maybe next time you’ll think before you Giant Punch somebody’s brother,” he said in a low, tight voice.

“You’re still upset over that?” boomed MH’s voice.

“You have no idea,” replied Luigi.

“Erm—look, L,” said MH. “If there’s something on your mind, then I’m all ears. Metaphorically speaking, of course. I won’t bite.”

“Everything’s peachy,” Luigi said softly. “I feel better, now that I defeated Giant DK on my own.”

“I’m sure Mario is proud of you,” MH said warmly. “Now, are you ready to move on to the next stage?”

“Yep.”

MH picked up Luigi and floated off with him.

 

 

 


	8. 4-1: Brinstar

The climate of Planet Zebes was, and always had been, a cross between a desert and a rainforest. Hot and humid, with merciful periods of coolness at night and during the autumn and winter months. Zebes was mainly volcanic in geography, with periods of bubbling lava or acid. But those living on that planet, mainly on the base known as Brinstar, had found ways to adapt to this volatility.

Inside her private exercise studio, Samus Aran, the Intergalactic Bounty Hunter, was astride her stationary bike, pedaling hard and fast. She’d been into indoor cycling well before the Smash tournaments started. In addition to training her and designing her suit for her, the Chozo had turned her onto what was known to fitness buffs as “spinning”. Great for the abs, legs and cardiovascular system, they said. Well, Samus liked those things about indoor cycling, but most of all, she liked it because it was fun, because it made her sweat and because it burned away stress or whatever foul emotion she was feeling as well as fat. On any day of the week, when she wasn’t Smashing or pursuing bounty, she was in a cycling class at California Family Fitness. Almost every Nintendo universe had a California Family Fitness someplace. There was even talk about getting a Cal Fit established in the Smash Realm.

A lot of Smashers could use a conveniently located Cal Fit.

Samus’s little gym overlooked the section of Brinstar designated for matches. There was one main platform with a destructible portion three quarters of the way. This destructible area could cause this main platform to separate. Above the main platform were two small platforms, and above them was another small platform. This top platform would be the only structure unsubmerged by the acid when it rose to its highest point. That was why most Smashers held that platform at all costs.

Luckily, the gym was also out of the acid’s reach, so Samus could safely watch it rise and fall as she got her cardio in. Headphones were snugly placed on her head, connected to a portable CD player. The bounty hunter’s workout attire consisted of a blue sports bra with the Screw Attack symbol imprinted on the center, blue, knee-length shorts and blue socks and sneakers. She’d been mounted on that bike for over an hour, shredding pounds and killing calories. Loose strands of blond hair stuck to her firm, slightly angular face. Cool sweat slicked her skin, tracing and dancing along the contours of her abs as they weaved with her pedal strokes, trailing down her back, standing out on her shoulders, running down her arms and forking at her elbows, pooling on the handlebars, and bathing her neck and chests and seeping into her bra. Her eyes were focused on some random area of the gym, but her mind was elsewhere.

Luigi—wow! She was really fighting him today? This unsung powerhouse was _way_ different from the awkward and shy fellow she first met in April 1999. He was still humble about his improvements and conquests, but still! He made the likes of Abate and Eddy México into powerhouses!

How could she forget the day two years ago when she accidentally walked in on him in the steam room and took the opportunity to alert him of their impending battle? The current Brinstar stage was an updated version of the stage they’d fiercely battled on during 1P Mode. Luigi had stood firm against her Charge Shot, Bomb, Screw Attack, Arm Cannon and punches and kicks hardened by her armor. He’d managed to not only wear down said armor but also crack her visor, forcing her to take off her helmet. The ways he’d made good use of that acid pit, too! Samus never doubted Luigi’s abilities for a second, and that day, she’d been glad she didn’t. In the course of two years, Samus had upgraded her armor, and she chose a Missile (which could be charged into a Super Missile) as her side-B. And Luigi had returned with some brand-new moves, a quick wavedash and improved skills and strategies. He could misfire all over the place if he wanted to. The bounty huntress counted in her mind how many Smashers had been on the receiving end of a Weegee beatdown even as she felt her legs and core work and work. In her opinion, some on that list really deserved it. Whether they were trying to cut him down or just being a general pain in the you-know-what, perhaps a loss to “Player 2” would give them something to think about.

She streamed out a breath and worked her muscles even harder, edging closer and closer to threshold. It was an adrenaline rush these days, seeing Luigi in battle. Each match he fought seemed to be a statement—that he didn’t have to take any mess from anybody anymore. Engaged in her high-intensity endurance training, it was as if she could see him right in front of her—

_He was not too proud to wear pink, forever engraved in stereotype as a “girl’s color”. The light pink shirt and cap, paired with the deep red overalls, paid homage to his days demolishing crumbling, condemned buildings or structural eyesores. And was the spiky-shelled turtle not an eyesore? Yeah, that hulking kidnapper thought he was everything; he was always hanging around with the Gerudo King and making everyone miserable. MH reprimanded them and even suspended them on a few occasions, and what did that do? Absolutely nothing. It was like they were too righteous to be punished._

_Ganon was seated at the end of her row, noshing on a hot dog with mustard and relish, obviously rooting for his pal. Samus, however, was cheering for Luigi. For the occasion, she wore an emerald-green soft cotton tank top, a pair of denim shorts and nude sandals. She’d also painted her nails green and white. She would’ve dyed her hair green, too, but that would’ve been too over-the-top. So, she used a sparkling green headband to keep her hair out of her eyes. There were some other spectators, she noticed, who were wearing green, from shirts and pants to shoes and accessories. There was even a girl with green eye shadow. Many fans had flocked to the Battlefield in solidarity with the green-clad plumber._

_Pink was, after all, a nice complement of green and seemed to melt into Luigi’s warm skin tone and chocolate brown locks and ’stache. Samus craned her neck and swore she could see his chest steadily rising and falling with his breaths. His eyes were locked on his opponent, the focused concentration lighting up those orbs. Lips, a neutral line, masking what many knew he was feeling as jaw muscles gently flexed. He was a cool contrast against the ambient lighting of the Battlefield._

_A tub of caramel corn was passed around. Samus took a nice handful and then passed the tub over to the racer sitting next to her. She was a row above Mario and Peach, and she could sense their nervousness as they distractedly ate a few handfuls of the caramel corn the racer offered them. Back on the stage, Luigi turned and locked eyes with his brother. Briefly, his face softened into a smile, and he offered Mario a quick wink before focusing his attention back on his opponent._

_In the face of Koopa’s intimidation games, Luigi stood there, bright and beautiful and bedazzling. His facial expression remained unchanged, even as he raised his fists. He may have looked vibrant but he was also focused; he left impulse behind. Samus squinted and noticed his lips move slightly, as if he was running through his strategy one last time. Examining his massive opponent, drinking in strengths and weaknesses, anticipating what his strategy might be and deciding on which moves he should bait. Koopa was not only conditioned to think low of Luigi but also was conditioned to meet a haphazard lunge at the word “Go”. So, what to do? The exact opposite._

_Luigi had definitely been the yin to Koopa’s yang. While the former was lighter, faster and more athletic, the former was stronger but slower, having one of the lowest jumps in the tournament. The man in green was all about defense, bait-and-punish, reads and spacing, but Koopa was all about demonstrating his awesome might and trying to sweep his weaknesses under the rug. Luigi intricately placed combos together like beads on a string or puzzle pieces, while Koopa coughed up whatever popped into his head. The green-clad plumber taught himself to be patient, to wait for a critical moment to come to him. Koopa taught himself to take what he wanted and crush anyone who opposed him. Luigi was a general at war; Koopa was a Leroy Jenkins. Perhaps his impatience was the reason why all of his plans failed._

_Like a spectator at a sports game, Samus waved a green scarf round her head, cheering like a tomboy, her eyes glued to the Battlefield, transfixed, as Luigi chipped away at his opponent with his aerials, which were fast and came out pretty early. His n-air weakened over time, but his f-air was sharper than a rapier. He used it to juggle, as a combo tool and out of a short hop. His b-air knocked Koopa away while protecting the rest of his body. He mainly used his d-air offstage to land the spike. When it got dangerous in the air, Luigi fast-fell into his ground attacks. The strong attacks were most likely the ones aimed at the face, and the smashes were saved for the body. But none of these attacks were random, nor were they aimless. Luigi slowed Koopa’s approaches with fireballs, pushed him away with his long-ranged roundhouse kick, tripped him with his heel kick and used his overhead punch as an anti-air technique, coupled with the turtle’s short jump. All the while, his eyes studied and analyzed every last inch of Koopa’s body, from his horned head to his clawed hands and feet to his tough shell. The skin on his face and limbs was a thick hide, but the underbelly was softer and fleshier. There would be plenty of nerves and nerve points that would deal quite the pain if traumatized. That helpless, defenseless section of Koopa’s body was the target for Luigi’s awesome Smash attacks, aimed with terrifying precision. He even treated_ that _with extreme prejudice! As for the face, snout and jaw took many a Trowel Stab, but whenever Luigi went for the face, he was catching his breath and bringing his strength back, using jabs, his standard 3-hitter, his strong side and his b-air, n-air and f-air. Whenever Koopa tried to escape, Luigi immediately punished with a breakdance sweep. If Koopa attempted to punish, Luigi would dodge or shield as many attacks as he could, but he didn’t want to be easily read. So, this was where Luigi’s baiting came in, conditioning his opponent to throw caution to the wind and punish with some laggy move that could either lead to a self-destruct or running into a painful trap. Luigi easily snatched Koopa out of shields and pummeled. These pummels were usually followed by a throw. Forward and back throws were reserved for when Luigi was being pressured and needed an escape. Up throws could combo into a Cyclone. Down throws were exclusively for offense. They led to impressive combos which robbed Luigi of breath but were so exhilarating to pull off. But due to Koopa’s bounce height after the throw, Luigi could also chain-grab him, conditioning himself to read his DI. Samus felt her seat vibrate with each slam of Koopa’s body onto the ground and gave a sideways smirk toward the King of Evil, who clutched his head in anguish and wailed for Din to help his friend._

_Magnificent. Bold. Delightful. Incredible. These were just four words to describe Luigi at that moment in time. Quickly, he pulled at the neck of his green shirt, glimmering with sweat. He licked his lips as he rolled up his sleeves. Samus could almost see the pearls of perspiration decorating each arm, as well as his neck and face. His breath had started to come out quickly, but he simply threw fireballs until he could at least breathe with his mouth closed, if still fairly fast. As the sweat lathered him up, his breaths settled into a deliberate pace, to stay calm, to stay focused, to stay motivated and to stay hungry. His hair was starting to peek out from under his cap. With his sleeve, he wiped blood off his face, from when Koopa had penetrated his fortress of combos. He had a good stock lead, but he wasn’t going to abandon his strategy now. Stoic blue rose to meet boiling mad green, fists up, a light compress of the lips. For someone anticipating angry charges from opponents, it was shocking that Koopa did such a thing. Luigi, also a whiz at anticipating haphazard, frustrated movements, was ready for him. Grab. Slam down. Start a combo._

_Thus, Luigi wasn’t entirely impregnable. There were moments when he miscalculated and found himself at the mercy of savage claw strikes, crushing slams or other painful blows from his larger opponent, but that wouldn’t deter him. He’d tweak his strategy and continue fighting. He’d open his mouth and shout to the sky. He’d always believe in himself. And he’d always have that energy._

_Which made it all the more puzzling to Samus when he lost._

She was brought back to the present by the “huff” of her breaths out of her now-open mouth, fast, harsh—as harsh as Luigi’s as he watched him nearly pound an overgrown turtle into submission, only to have his luck turn sour. There was also something else in her breaths. Anger. It was as if there was a channel connecting her with Luigi, allowing her to feel whatever he was feeling. During the match, Samus noticed that Luigi seemed—cross—with his opponent. Was it their long rivalry speaking, or was it something else? Word on the street was that Koopa didn’t take him as seriously as Mario, calling him names like “Green Stache”. Everyone hoped that Luigi’s battlefield tactics would force that turtle to respect him. So far, that wasn’t happening.

“Samus?”

She slightly lifted up her headphones. “Yeah?”

“I’d save some of that energy if I were you,” boomed Master Hand. “Don’t forget the adventurer you’re taking on today.”

“I’d never forget anything like that,” Samus told him. She made no move to stop her cycling. “Besides, I’m warming up for it.”

“From what I hear, it takes a lot to work out on an indoor bike,” said MH. “I don’t want you fighting with sore limbs.”

“Don’t worry, Master Hand,” said Samus. “I know when to stop.”

“He’s on his way here, you know,” warned MH.

“Cool. Tell him I’ll be there in a jiff.”

Sweat puddled on the floor below her as it continued to pour off her body. MH couldn’t help but catch something in the bounty hunter’s tone.

“Sam—is something the matter? Look, I apologize for interrupting you, but I just don’t want you to burn out before you take on Luigi. You’ll need as much juice as you can get.”

“It’s not that,” Samus said through her breaths. “It’s just—one of the newcomers here has been a jerk lately, and I want to know what will make him shape up.”

“I know who you’re talking about,” sighed MH. “If I may, let me offer you one piece of advice. Ignore him, and he’ll stop. Just remember, Sam—nobody likes a tattletale.”

“Thanks, I guess,” muttered Samus. “I can’t wait to fight Luigi—again.” She chuckled.

“Break a leg, Sam,” said MH before leaving Samus to her own devices.

Samus closed her eyes and let herself go until she could no longer ignore the throbbing in her side. Finally, she slowed her legs and got her heart rate back down. She took a few minutes to stretch out and wiped her bike clean. Her sports drink was still relatively cool as it poured down her throat. On her way out, she paused at the mirror and regarded the limber woman staring back at her with a smile.

 

On the Brinstar stage, Luigi sat cross-legged, eyes closed, focusing himself, breathing softly and deeply at a moderate pace. The sound of metallic footsteps stirred him back into consciousness, and he opened his eyes to see Samus staring at him.

“I kept you waiting, didn’t I?” she asked.

“Not really,” replied Luigi as he stood. “I haven’t been here long.”

“Hm. Good to know,” said Samus. “You ready?”

“ _You_ ready?”

She smiled. “I asked you first.”

“I’m ready.”

“I’m ready, too.”

Luigi shook Samus’s proffered hand, staring intently at her.

“Oh, and by the way, my armor recently got an upgrade,” said Samus. “So, it won’t be as easy to break.”

“We’ll see.”

Both fighters raised their fists. Samus’s face was obscured by her visor, but her eyes and her mouth were as hard as her opponent’s. Her blood was still pumping from being on her stationary bike, and she wasn’t too tired to take on the man in green! Luigi’s eyes searched the helmeted visage before him as he thought about how he got past her projectiles last time and how her Missiles would present a new challenge for him. He glanced at her Arm Cannon, held at the ready. Let’s see if it stopped him this time around.

READY…GO!

Luigi didn’t even give Samus time to charge her shot. He approached her with two quick fireballs and was soon upon her with karate chops. She air-dodged and swung her leg around, knocking him back diagonally, and took the opportunity to charge. As he got up, she fired, sending him flying to the ledge. He flipped back onto the stage with a leg sweep and countered her assault with two body blows. From there, he started a chain grab with his down throw which ultimately led to a combo. He punctuated his offensive with a Trowel Stab and then threw more fireballs. Samus fired a Missile at him, but he dodged, slipped in and landed some more blistering strikes to the body. She tether-grabbed him and began to pummel him with her Arm Cannon before slamming him down and following up with her f-air and her Screw Attack. Luigi fast-fell and swiftly checked himself for injuries. Aches, but nothing serious. He took a deep breath and then kicked his heel out low, catching his opponent mid-approach. A quick spinning kick to her side doubled her over, inviting him to pepper her helmet with short-hop f-airs and n-airs. He strung together a handful of up tilts before she brought an end to this nonsense with a powerful axe kick, and up smash and a Bomb. As soon as her foe smacked against the ground, she picked him up with her Grapple Beam, slammed him back down and started an aerial combo which became a mostly-smash combo when he tried to DI away from her. He’d attempt to escape, only for her to put him back into hitstun with a Bomb. Eventually, however, her combo-fest was put to an end by a roundhouse kick to the hip.

By now, Luigi was bleeding from his temples, his nose and his mouth and chin. His body was in pain, but he could ignore it. One eye was swollen, and he was covered in bruises and burns. Seeing Samus charge her Charge Shot, he sidestepped the blast and then aimed a forward smash at her shoulder, and then parried her Arm Cannon strike to return with a jab to the face. It was his turn now to start combo-ing, stunning her with his sissy fists, blindsiding her with his d-air, head-butt and b-air and knocking the wind from her over and over again with his forward smash. If the throbbing aches got too much, then he’d hurl her away with a forward or back throw (normally back). He’d always get his bearings back, and he’d get them back quickly. Then, he’d either use fireballs or jabs to set up for an offensive.

Below them, the acid continued to bubble, rise and fall. So focused were they on each other that they almost forgot about it. But now, Luigi began to lay into Samus, using the acid pool to infinitely combo her. She returned the favor once she escaped. They now began to scramble for the top platform, the safe spot, where there was just enough room for the two of them to exchange wicked blows but one could be knocked off at any time. But Samus would use her Super Missiles, which had better homing abilities, to force her foe to back off, possibly making him fair game for the rising acid. And Luigi would misfire to safety, knocking into Samus as an added bonus. He tried many times to pull of an up-B, but Samus wasn’t stupid; he’d seen him do that to other opponents and frustrate him by staying _just_ out of range.

Since she wasn’t going to let him do his Super Jump Punch, he was going to have to KO her another way. Resisting the urge to throw frenzied attacks every which way, he baited Samus into shielding and either grabbed her out of it or broke it. His Trowel Stabs connected hard with her armor, denting it up despite her upgrade. He used his wavedash to quickly evade her tether grab and went for his more long-ranged moves until he got her to drop her guard and let him move back in. But he wasn’t the only fast fighter out there; her speed continued to rival his with her fast kicks, Arm Cannon blasts and Missiles. Both made sure to hit precise areas on the other’s body. That armor still hurt Luigi’s hands, but he continued to throw attacks nonetheless, dodging projectiles or sometimes even crouching under them. Shielding against them was useless; she’d learned how to break them with a Bomb, followed by a Charge Shot. He could be pelting her with karate chops when she threw a b-air out of the blue. Or, she could be slamming axe kicks into him, following up with her f-air, u-air, d-air or some smash attack when he disrupted her with a kick or two. Rising acid also disrupted combos close to the ground, allowing one or the other to take the lead.

There it was again. The angry, harsh breathing. Concentration lightly creased his forehead, his eyes big, bright starbursts. Yet he wasn’t getting frustrated—he was staying in control and focusing everything inward, on finding out what he was doing wrong here and why. His opponent had been on plenty of missions to know that impulse wasn’t going to do any good. She had to watch for him to make a mistake. The tough part was that he was doing the exact same thing, and once she punished him for rolling, or DI-ing the wrong way or some other move like that, then he wasn’t likely to do it again, no matter how much she tried to bait him. But his baiting was so subtle and out of the blue that Samus couldn’t help but fall for it. He was without doubt one of the cleverest people she ever had the pleasure of meeting.

Luigi tasted his sweat. Its saltiness mixed with the metallic zing of blood. They were back on the high platform as the acid swelled menacingly, Super Smashing away, sometimes knocking or throwing each other out of the safety zone into the burning liquid below, only to send them back down again and again. They fought on the stage and tangled off the stage, in the air, where a simple, well-timed hit snatched a combo from one and gave it to the other. Recoveries were attempted, hindered and punished. Green Missiles flew across Brinstar at high-rated speeds and rammed into Chozo armor. Screw Attacks forced Luigi upwards. Bombs were used as anti-air maneuvers, where Samus could fire a fully charged shot as Luigi struggled to his feet. The bounty hunter found herself assailed with kicks from all sides, breakdance sweeps and powerful punches as well as those stinging chops and those swift, ferocious open hand jabs. His face was pink, and he was near-breathless, but he kept answering her strategy with his, refusing to let up. Because letting up would mean that he let the words get to him.

Once the acid settled down back down, they returned to center stage, battering, throwing fireballs, firing blasts and Missiles, grabbing, throwing each other, attacking, defending, laying Bombs and laying the groundwork for the finishing blow. Luigi could see his foe’s breaths fogging up the visor of her helmet as they echoed from her Varia Suit. Samus could see the look on his face as he continued to drive or try to drive his blows into her. Sensing his iron determination, she thought, _It’s you or me, L_.

After a brief but exciting deadlock in which they exchanged their most painful attacks yet, Samus found herself in Luigi’s grip. He pummeled her once—twice—three times—until his head started hurting, and then hurled her hard onto the stage. As she bounced back up—

Luigi shouted with effort as he speared his hand one last time, right onto Samus’s chin. Due to the damage she sustained, this hit was the final straw for her. She flew diagonally off the stage and out of the boundaries.

SUCCESS!

He rounded his lips, closed his eyes and released his breath in a low, soft whistle. Then, he inhaled slowly through his nose and stomach, feeling his abs contract, and then breathed out in another whistle. He breathed five more times in this fashion and was pleased to find that his heart rate was back down to normal. Samus had perfected her skills as much as he had, and she’d given it her all the way she did two years prior. She was still a worthy opponent and friend.

“I wouldn’t start the victory parade if I were you,” boomed Master Hand’s voice.

“Why not?” asked Luigi.

Klaxons began to sound around Luigi, and the ground shook. As he struggled to keep his footing, he saw rocks beginning to crumble around him. “What’s going on?!” he demanded of MH.

“You have 40 seconds,” said MH. “A ship is waiting for you at the top of the escape shaft. This is where your high jumps come in.”

 

 

 

 

 


	9. 4-2: Escape from Brinstar

Luigi wasted no time asking questions. He reached the escape shaft and began hopping up the platforms. In addition to the klaxons echoing around him, red lights flashed, and signs reading **CODE RED** illuminated on the walls. Disregarding the noise, Luigi continued to leap from platform to platform, his high jumps serving him well. When the need arose, he used a Super Jump Punch as a third jump option. Or, he’d use his Cyclone to gain additional vertical height. He glanced up and saw the ship above his head. He was almost there. He was going to make it. There were only 20 seconds left on the timer. Luigi began pushing his legs as far as they could go. He’d become an athlete attempting the high jump. Falling short of a platform, he managed to grab the edge with both hands and flip himself up. He paid no attention to the stupid timer or those God-forsaken klaxons. They didn’t matter—all that mattered now was to keep jumping.

With only five seconds to spare, Luigi sprang up as high as he could and into the waiting ship, which came to life and flew, unpiloted, away from the endangered planet.

SUCCESS!

The man in green watched, gasping for breath, as Zebes vanished into a blazing ball of fire and rock. The rocks showered and scattered throughout deep space, but the glass on the ship was completely shatter-proof. Having calmed down, Luigi settled back and closed his eyes.

“Samus is safe,” Master Hand’s voice reassured him. “I teleported her to the lounge. As for that planet, it will re-generate shortly.”

Luigi sighed in relief, eyes still closed, and enjoyed the ride.

_The awards ceremony had its usual pomp and circumstance. Although the results didn’t turn out the way the majority wanted, everyone in the stands politely clapped for the victor. They had to be respectful of all of the fighters, right? Luigi, the defeated fighter, was also clapping, but he wasn’t paying much attention to the ceremony—except for the way his opponent posed, laughed and gloated. Couldn’t he just win gracefully for once?_

_But other than that, Luigi was rewinding the match in his head, trying to figure out where he erred and how to prevent it in the future. Nobody was perfect, of course, but for the first half of the fight, he was doing so well! He was at the top of his game; the man in green at his finest. And then, poof. Koopa had somehow snatched his advantage away. He’d found himself in Koopa’s claw and then—no, focus. Don’t stew and feel sorry for yourself. Think about how you went in, how you reacted to your opponent and the exact moment when he managed to read you. Find your mistakes, and there you’ll find your areas for improvement. Don’t get upset over it—learn from it._

_Koopa had sauntered away with Ganondorf before Luigi could offer him a handshake. What was he, too good for sportsmanship? Well, fine. He couldn’t deal with him right now, anyway. The crowd began to disperse, and Luigi departed the area to move on with his life. First, he’d go to the cafeteria; chicken carbonera was on the lunch menu. Then, he’d burn off those calories in the Training Room. Maybe he could catch Mario there, and they’d talk about where he slipped up. Luigi smiled at the thought of one of their energetic, ego-free spars, of the music on the stereo as bro clashed with bro, sparkles and fireworks flying, the love between them firing them up as they tossed in encouraging words as well as blows. They’d probably be in there for most of the day, and then they’d all eat dinner and go to bed, and that would be that. Tomorrow, he’d be refreshed and ready for more matches._

_His train of thought was interrupted he was seized by the arm and roughly whipped around. He found himself staring straight into the sneering face of King Koopa. Immediately, Luigi’s face hardened, his eyes telling the princess-snatcher that he was in no mood for his company. Alas, Koopa didn’t take the hint; instead, he gripped Luigi by the shoulder and roared with laughter as he marched him to the replay monitors. When they got there, Koopa shifted his hold to the hair on the back of Luigi’s head and forced his head up, making him watch himself getting beaten, over and over. He’d bash his face repeatedly against the counter or deftly slice him with his claws each time he averted his gaze. Luigi remained stoic through countless minutes of this torture._

_And then he felt that reptile’s breath in his ear as he began talking to him._

_“Look at the way I pummeled you, Green ’Stache. “Look at me absolutely destroying you—look at how sad, weak and pitiful you are. You really think you’re so useful to your dear brother if you can’t even beat me on your own? You think the Toads will want anything to do with you after seeing this? You’re nothing but a simpering, pipsqueak second banana, now let’s see those tears.”_

_He laughed sadistically, but he was set off when Luigi simply refused to cry. And then Koopa forcefully whipped Luigi back around so he could get in his face, saying more things as Luigi’s vision narrowed to just that foul-mouthed turtle and the monitor showing the crushing defeat over and over like a scratched CD and—and he vaguely remembered another familiar booming voice joining in from afar—_

“Hey. Don’t get too comfortable,” warned MH. “You’re going to continue your adventure soon.”

“Thanks for the heads-up,” murmured Luigi. He now realized that he was sweating again, and that his body was slightly shaking with rage. As he forced the memories and the words out of his brain, he glanced out the window and saw the star-shaped planet growing bigger and bigger.

Popstar.

 

 

 


	10. 5-1: Green Greens

Popstar, where the burg of Dreamland was situated, had a climate as peaceful as its inhabitants. A regular rainy season in the winter, warm springs, hot summers and cool in the autumn. Within Dreamland was the area known as Green Greens, home of Whispy Woods, whose branches seemed to burst with luscious apples and whose gusts of wind defended his fruit. Soft grass made up the floor, and on either side were yellow blocks, some with stars on them and others with bomb symbols. The latter was explosive.

Resting at the base of Whispy Woods was Kirby, the Star Warrior and Hero of Dreamland. The “filthy casual” to serious Melee tournament players. A blue sleeping cap with white dots on it was atop his head, and small bubbles drifted out of his rounded mouth. Kirby was eight inches tall, could inhale foes and food and had the ability to copy the other fighters in Melee. His round body was pink, with blushes at the cheeks, stubby arms, red shoes and bean-shaped eyes. And what exactly was Kirby dreaming about? Well—cake! His favorite dessert! The fluffy, spongy goodness with creamy, flavorful frosting and filling! Drool slowly spilled out of the corners of Kirby’s mouth as his yummy dream continued.

Master Hand floated in and noticed Kirby slumbering. Quietly, he moved over and tapped the puffball with his index finger. “Time to wake up, sleepyhead,” he whispered.

Kirby stirred awake and peered with half-lidded eyes at MH. “Poyo?” he yawned.

Master Hand took a handkerchief and wiped the drool from Kirby’s chin. “Luigi’s going through Adventure Mode, remember?”

Kirby perked up slightly. “Poy!”

“I brought you a tasty treat,” said MH, setting a plate of cake with a plastic fork stabbed into it before Kirby.

“Poyo!” cheered Kirby as he dug in.

“L will be here soon, okay?”

Kirby nodded, his mouth full of cake.

Two years. Two years was all it took for Kirby to fall from second to last on the tier list. Life in the tournaments became difficult and miserable. He was heckled by fans old and new and booed for winning. He was harassed and degraded, and his exploits as a young Star Warrior were disregarded. It got to the point that Kirby had been sorely tempted to end it all. And he probably would’ve, if not for the mustachioed man in green—Luigi.

Luigi had been in Kirby’s shoes in 1999. It was what had led him to take on 1P Mode and challenge the powerful Master Hand. The plumber had saved Kirby from himself, pulling him back from the brink. One night, he’d confronted the puffball when he found him with slashes all over his body, his Final Cutter centimeters from his outstretched appendage. He began to give Kirby advice on how to beat the stigma of being last. And whenever he caught someone messing with Kirby, he’d make them apologize and tell them to get lost. The Star Warrior would watch with uncontained delight as Luigi brutally thrashed higher tiers. 20XX. 20BC. 2022. 20GX. Those camps found their regimes crumbling at the hands of a mid-tier fighter. But thanks to Luigi, Kirby learned to ignore the taunts and the whispers of “filthy casual”. He practiced fiercely alongside the man in green. And he perfected his “Kirbycide” technique, in which he air-dropped himself and an opponent off the stage or inhaled them and let himself fall. Kirbycide was Kirby’s ultimate revenge for the way he’d been treated!

In return for Luigi’s kindness toward him, Kirby began to stick up for the man in green, making enemies in Ganon and King Koopa. During a match, he’d copy the Warlock Punch or the Fire Breath and show them how it felt to be knocked around before ending the fight with a Kirbycide. Too bad they didn’t learn anything from it.

_“POYO! Poyo, poyo, poyo!” squealed Kirby as he sat in the stands with Pikachu and Jigglypuff as his seatmates, watching the five-stock battle between Luigi and Koopa. It was a strong start for the plumber, who held back until his opponent lost patience and rushed headlong at him without thinking. From there, it was bliss and Heaven, like digging into a large slice of cake. Like Linkin Logs or Barrel of Monkeys, Luigi expertly and intricately pieced and strung combos together. Some combos were roadmaps leading to more combos. Other combos led to the opponent losing a stock. They applied pressure on Koopa, frustrating him, challenging his power and authority. Luigi used Koopa’s frustration to lure him into another combo. And another. And another. And another. Until the big, bad turtle managed to DI away and try to retaliate. Fat chance at that! Luigi wasn’t entirely Superman; he wound up facing Koopa’s claws and shell more than once. But his reactions were so well thought-out that the injuries were not dangerous. The blood scared Kirby a little, though. With his eyes, the pink fluffball gobbled up Luigi’s impressive combos, baits, reads, punishes and fluid dodges like appetizers. Yummy. More, more, more!_

_Until it all went rotten._

_Luigi had held fast to a strong stock lead. Anyone watching that day smelled a five-stock on Koopa, not necessarily a JV5. The turtle had only two stock remaining, and Luigi hadn’t lost any of his yet. But one tiny slip-up—one miscalculation—was all it took for Koopa to grab him and exact his gruesome revenge._

_It hadn’t been pretty._

_Kirby couldn’t bear to watch—he could only discern from the horrified gasps and shrieks from the audience, Koopa’s roars and Luigi yells of pain that everything was going terribly, horribly wrong. The green-clad plumber tried to hold it together, managing some smash attacks despite now being on the defensive, and for a few breathless moments, hope floated in the air. But Koopa had snatched it away, as Luigi was unable to take those last two stocks. Luigi had gone from a three-stock lead to a one-stock disadvantage and finally—agonizing defeat._

_At the word “Game!”, Kirby dared to look._

_“Poyo…” he said in a choked voice._

_There was Koopa, looking as if he’d accomplished something, laughing and mocking the audience who’d rooted for Luigi. As for the man in green, he’d been blasted from the stage by Koopa’s blows, but Kirby saw blood on the stage. Koopa was bleeding, too, but the fluffball had enough intuition to know whose blood was marring the Battlefield._

_Pikachu held Kirby’s appendage as everyone filed into the reception hall, where the award ceremony would take place. When they found someplace to sit, Pikachu planted a kiss on Kirby’s lips, consoling him. Kirby thanked him by returning the kiss with a deeper one, and then they turned back to the ceremony about to begin._

_“This game’s winner is—Koopa!”_

_Kirby, Pikachu and the others applauded for Koopa, but their minds were on Luigi. He stood a few distances away from the victor, also applauding. His deep red overalls concealed the majority of his injuries, but Kirby saw the blood on his face and peeking through his pink shirt. A distracted look was in his eyes as he clapped. Of course, the turtle rubbed his victory in nice and deep—along with the fact that Mario, Peach and Yoshi had seen the whole thing. Some Wireframes wiped Luigi’s face clean, but his eyes showed disapproval and disdain as he watched Koopa’s little victory jig. And then the ceremony was over, and everyone left the reception area._

_“Pika,” Pikachu said softly, encouraging Kirby to comfort Luigi._

_Kirby nodded. “Poyo.”_

_He waited till the crowd thinned out, and then puffed himself into the air to search for the plumber._

_That was when he heard the voices in the replay area—_

“Poyo!” Kirby yelled angrily, throwing what was left of his cake off the stage.

Then, he closed his eyes and mentally counted to ten. No sense dwelling on the past now. All he could do was hope that one day, Koopa would get what he deserved.

“It’s good to see you, Kirby.”

Kirby turned and saw Luigi standing there at the other end of the stage. “Hii!” he greeted.

“I’m surprised they let you participate in this,” said Luigi, “seeing how they think of you.”

Kirby shrugged. “Poy.”

“But I’m glad they did,” Luigi went on, raising his fists. “Come on, Kirby. Let’s dance.”

READY—GO!

Kirby shielded Luigi’s fireballs, hoping to bait him into dashing at him. Luigi ignored the bait, continuing to flick out fireballs until Kirby’s shield was relatively weak. Kirby’s shield stance, which grew more visible as his shield shrank, was from his Guard Ability in his universe. When the shield was low enough, Luigi quietly approached Kirby and hit him with a roundhouse kick, breaking the shield entirely.

“Poooyyyy…” moaned Kirby, the shield break leaving him disoriented. Luigi’s heel kick popped him into the air, and then he scored multiple hits on him using his Cyclone. Due to Kirby’s light weight, Luigi could launch him far just by using his strong attacks. He peppered the fluffball with them before Kirby used his multiple jumps to get away. With a grunt, the Star Warrior swung a hammer at Luigi. He dodged the first few swings, but then Kirby nailed him with a lunging forwards kick and then battered him with the hammer. Luigi rolled away and threw a Trowel Stab, his first smash attack in this battle. Kirby gasped as he was blown away diagonally, but he managed to recover with the Final Cutter.

Luigi was there, waiting for him. After delivering a series of light jabs, he chain-grabbed Kirby before going into his aerial and ground combos, spiking the fluffball back onto the stage with his d-air. Kirby bounced back with Final Cutter and began a combo of his own with his f-air, d-air and quick up tilt, which chained into itself like Luigi’s. He’d use Final Cutter each time Luigi attempted to DI out. But when Kirby misread a tech from his opponent, Luigi went in with a Cyclone, an up smash, n-airs, f-airs and a d-air into a grounded combo involving forward and down smashes, his overhand punches and his well-ranged forward kick. Kirby punished with his Vulcan Jab, slashed his Final Cutter a few more times, stomped on him repeatedly with his down throw and used Stone to break his foe’s shields. He’d jump and swing the hammer over his body, pelting Luigi with multiple hits and acting like a Screw Attack. He’d use his Burning Ability as a dash attack, but Luigi always dodged it, making Kirby overshoot the stage and waste his jumps in recovering. Here, Luigi would go for misfires, knocking Kirby off the stage again and again.

As Whispy Woods blew periodically, Luigi’s methodical attacks continued to thud into Kirby’s rotund and rosaceous body. With moves from his different abilities, Kirby showed Luigi that he was adorable, yet deadly. Purple and blue wove with Kirby’s pink skin like a marble finish, while Luigi was battered all over from Stone and Hammer and slashed from Final Cutter. But despite Kirby being a whirling pink whirlwind, Luigi’s precision squeaked ahead, knocking the Star Warrior out of the air, dodging Hammers and Final Cutters, sidestepping Stones and breaking out of combos. Poking through shields, frustrating Kirby’s approaches and combo-ing this way and that. And whenever he could, he read the little puffball like his favorite book.

Kirby made a frustrated little noise and then opened his maw, sucking as hard as he could. Luigi found himself caught in the suction, and Kirby inhaled him. But instead of a Kirbycide, he spat Luigi back out after taking his Copy Ability, now wearing his own green cap with an L on it. Green fireballs flew back and forth before Luigi closed the distance and smash-attacked until Kirby’s Copy Ability was knocked away. Their blows volleyed and pounded harder and harder, Kirby’s face going as red as his cheeks. Why was he so easy to body?

His frustration was ultimately his undoing. Kirby positioned himself at the ledge and Inhaled Luigi once more. Then, he jumped off. But Luigi managed to escape from Kirby’s gullet and meteor smashed him with his d-air before recovering to the stage. Kirby fell helplessly into the abyss and suffered at K.O.

SUCCESS!

Luigi sighed. “You shouldn’t have gotten frustrated like that, Kirby,” he said softly. “I know you’re having a hard time, but patience is a virtue.”

He jerked back to attention as 15 Warp Stars zipped around him, each ejecting a Kirby onto the stage. Each Kirby sported a hat pertaining to the Copy Ability of a random fighter.

“Hii!” they waved in unison.

Luigi smiled and once again put up his dukes. “This is gonna be fun,” he mused.

 

 


	11. 5-2: Kirby Horde

“Poyo?”

15 Kirbies stared in wonder at their single opponent, currently retreating into his thoughts. His breathing had slowed and deepened, as it always did when he was preparing to face multiple fighters at once. Energy flowed freely into his system, and he pushed out the distractions and the mental toxins until it was just him and the Star Warriors and the whistling wind from Whispy Woods.

“Poyo?”

The fight against the first Kirby hadn’t been easy. Bruises speckled his skin, and the Kirbies smelled the sharp scent of blood. They puffed closer to him, forming a circle, enclosing him. Luigi could feel them beginning to close in. He could smell their essence, along with the essence of the fighter each Kirby copied. He trailed his tongue across his lips, eyes still closed, concentrating now on his belly moving in and out with his breaths. He still remembered what Kirby had been through, what _he_ had been through. It was as if they were survivors of some psychological war. But since these Kirbies weren’t about to go easy on him, he wasn’t going to go easy on them. He knew and understood exactly what went through their minds as they stared at him with their big, adorable eyes. Because two years ago, faced with a high or a mid-tier, he had the exact same thoughts.

 _It would’ve been easy—oh, so easy—to use the tier argument with Koopa. The turtle was only one slot above Kirby in the G tier, yet he acted like he owned everything and everyone in this tournament! Luigi, now in the D tier, had been sorely tempted to wipe that smile off Koopa’s face by playing that card. But how could he do what others did to him two years ago? Yeah, he was mid-tier, but he had to work and train hard to get to this point. He must never forget his humbled beginnings in Super Smash Brothers. The last thing he wanted to do was to stoop to_ their _level. Besides, some of his friends and even his brother was ranked lower than him. What would they think if he started using that kind of attitude?_

_But he remembered the cries of his friends as claws and shell spines dug into his skin. He remembered Koopa dragging him to the replay room to watch the defeat again and again. He remembered those green eyes, the hot breath in his face and the words._

_“Bet the Princess is crying a river over seeing this, isn’t she? You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to make a videotape of this and send it to her castle so_ everyone _can see it—_ everyone _can find out for themselves what a loser you are. You thought you had me on the ropes with those stupid combos, didn’t you? Well, guess what? I enjoyed putting a stop to your pretty little display and snatching the lead from you, and the only regret I feel is that the match wasn’t timed so I could keep doing it again! And don’t think I didn’t see those crestfallen looks on your friends’ faces—things of beauty, if you ask me! I would’ve loved to thrash them one-by-one, but I guess fate has a different plan, huh? Hey—remember the way I body-slammed you against the cold, hard ground? Felt so nice, I had to do it more than twice! If you remember anything, Greenie, remember this—you’ll always be nothing, no matter what you do! GWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAA!!”_

_Koopa was still talking and Luigi still stood there, refusing to break down and trying to figure out a way to shut that reptilian cake-hole. But then he heard another booming laugh—a laugh he knew quite well._

_The laugh of the Gerudo King._

“Poyo?”

The Kirbies waited, exchanging worried looks, as Luigi tore himself free of the memory, his breathing jerky and erratic. His eyes opened, the puffballs starting at the strong emotions they found in them. Sweat stood out in sharp relief against his reddened, still-swollen face. The blood was beginning to dry. His white gloves were stretched taut; he was clenching his fists so tightly. A vein had floated to the surface of his neck. And then, it slowly began to float away—away—away, the embers in Luigi’s eyes settling down, his body relaxing, the redness dying in his face and his fists unclenching. His face softened as he met the gazes of the Kirbies, feeling his breathing return to normal. It took him another minute for him to completely calm down.

A smile stretched on his face.

The Kirbies brightened. “Poyo!”

Then, they all got into their fighting stances, crowding close to the man in green. He, too, put up his dukes, watching their eyes harden, just like his eyes, and hearing their breathing fall into a measured pace, just like his.

“You guys ready?” asked Luigi.

Their voices dropped. “Poyo.”

READY—GO!

The first of the Kirbies rushed for Luigi. He met them with fireballs, isolating a Kirby with a mop of blue hair on his head. After taking jabs and kicks from Luigi, he took a familiar-looking sword, pulled back, and turned a deep shade of blue before thrusting it forward. Luigi executed a perfect dodge, watching as the sword missed him by a fraction of an inch. He bent his elbow in that familiar way and lashed out with his Trowel Stab, but Marth Kirby ducked and kicked low, knocking Luigi onto his bottom. Nimbly, he swept his legs and got up, hitting Marth Kirby with a low kick of his own. Marth Kirby bounced into the air, enabling Luigi to juggle him using his up tilt and then launch into short hop f-airs, ending with a n-air and a d-air. Once again, Luigi poked his hand out at Marth Kirby, sending him toward the yellow blocks at the edge of the stage.

At that point, Luigi was set upon by two more Kirbies. One of them resembled Sword Kirby and the other wore a pink and white headdress with a gold Tri-Force pin on it. Link Kirby attacked first with a boomerang, and then Zelda Kirby met the stunned opponent with three forward spinning kicks and a Final Cutter. Link Kirby used Stone and dropped on Luigi from above, while Zelda Kirby attacked with the Hammer. Luigi put some distance between him and the Kirbies using his fireballs, thinking of a way to separate the two. As the two Kirbies puffed toward him, Luigi executed a Cyclone, knocking them in opposite directions, and then went for Link Kirby before he could reteam with Zelda Kirby, trapping him against Whispy Woods and the blocks and pounding him with tilts and the occasional forward or up smash. Finally, he knocked Link Kirby into the sky with a Super Jump Punch.

He whirled in time to see Marth Kirby’s Shield Breaker stab into him. It hurt as much as the real deal. Quickly, Luigi popped Marth Kirby into the air with his down tilt and chain-grabbed him with his down throw before laying a combo of smashes and strong attacks and finishing with a Cyclone. Then, he saw a yellow block with a bomb symbol on it and threw a fireball toward it. Marth Kirby was caught in the explosion and KO’d.

Zelda Kirby blindsided Luigi with a dash attack. Luigi retaliated with his sissy fists, and as the remaining Kirbies floated around, the two had a rally going. By the time Zelda Kirby was subdued, Luigi ached all over, but he managed to escape Zelda Kirby’s grab, defeating the puffball with a spike from his d-air.

Twelve Kirbies remained. For a while, Luigi kicked and Trowel Stabbed this Kirby and that Kirby, throwing fireballs until he could get one in his sights. And eventually, he found one, a Kirby with full body fur. He made himself focus as DK Kirby wound up and attacked with a Giant Punch, punctuating the move with a funny little noise. DK Kirby missed, and Luigi went in for the kill, grabbing, pummeling, slamming and constructing combos. But DK Kirby managed to escape and go on the offensive with some Kirby-sized Giant Punches, his forward spinning kicks, his b-air and his strong up. Luigi pulled himself together and threw DK Kirby away from him and then let fly with a misfired Missile, knocking DK Kirby off the stage.

The next Kirby to confront Luigi had yellow, pointy ears and sent bursts of electricity toward him. Pikachu Kirby resembled the electric mouse so much that he even said Pikachu’s battle cry as he used Thunder Jolt. Luigi dodged and jumped over the electric pulses, slipping in long-ranged attacks, before one hit him square in the chest. As the man in green yelled out, Pika Kirby hit him three more times with Thunder Jolt, did a powerful split kick and then suplexed him into the blocks. Luigi scrambled away before an explosive block landed on him, grabbed Pika Kirby, swung him around thrice, and threw him into the explosive block. Pika Kirby wailed as he sailed off the stage.

“PK Flash!”

A Kirby wearing a baseball cap spoke those words as he sent a large pulse of light Luigi’s way. The man in green took the attack and then took charge with several smash attacks, finishing with his roundhouse kick. Ness Kirby grabbed him, sprang into the air and then crashed back down with an explosion, sending Luigi reeling. He recovered, nailed Ness Kirby with a b-air and peppered him with jabs, karate chops and Cyclones. Ness Kirby lunged forward and kicked his opponent hard, doubling him over, and Vulcan Jabbed all over his face before down-throwing him repeatedly and forcing him off the stage with repeated f-airs. But Luigi managed to read him and DI’d to safety, karate-chopping Ness Kirby some more and then sending him plummeting with his d-air.

Nine Kirbies left. One Kirby wearing what appeared to be the top part of a Yoshi head and another Kirby wearing a red and gold visor rushed him, but Luigi was ready for him with his Cyclone. Yoshi Kirby trapped him in an egg, and he and Falcon Kirby battered him on both sides before Luigi got away. He briefly incapacitated Falcon Kirby and used Whispy Woods to body Yoshi Kirby. Once he was damaged enough, Luigi slammed a Super Jump Punch into the puffball and then turned back in time to dodge Falcon Kirby’s—

“FAL-COON PAAANCH!”

Falcon Kirby’s adorable pronunciation of that move brought on the “D’awwww!” and was almost as meme-worthy as the original. But there was no time to think about that now. Falcon Kirby was going at him as aggressively as the racer he copied. Luigi gave as good as he got, but the clash between them quickly became deadlocked. One moment, Luigi could have Falcon Kirby in a combo, and in the next, Falcon Kirby could be Falcon Punching Luigi into the next century. This deadlock was broken when a Kirby wearing a space helmet saw fit to jump in with a Charge Shot inexplicably fired without an Arm Cannon!

Samus Kirby’s intrusion turned the tide in Falcon Kirby’s favor, and the two wasted no time in double-teaming the plumber, sometimes having one hold him while the other unloaded. But one time while they were doing this, Luigi broke free and did a breakdance sweep, popping them both into the air. Luigi jumped and attacked them with a Cyclone, launching them further skyward, leading to a Star KO of the two Kirbies.

Six Kirbies to go. Luigi caught his breath and smiled at the three Kirbies floating forward. One Kirby wore a crown, the second wore a red cap, and the third wore a green cap.

Peach Kirby lashed out with Final Cutter once—twice—three times—until Luigi ended the onslaught with a fireball. He was then cornered by the Kirby Bros, who took turns using him as a punching bag and giving him a taste of his own medicine with their fireballs. Out of nowhere, Peach Kirby slammed Luigi against Whispy Woods with Hammer. With a forceful shout, Luigi Trowel Stabbed the three Kirbies, sending them scattering. Mario Kirby was the first to get up, throwing fireballs which bounced along the ground and weakened over time. Luigi evaded the fireballs, grabbed Mario Kirby and down threw him into a combo. Peach Kirby came to the rescue with a tiny Toad who blinded Luigi with spores. By the time his vision cleared, Luigi Kirby was also ready for more. They trapped Luigi into a tent of pain, using Final Cutter, Stone, Hammer, Vulcan Jabs, strong ups, strong downs, smashes, aerials and the copied neutral specials. They threw him into the ground or at one another, watching their teammate stomp him into the ground. But Luigi wasn’t about to give up. He attacked Peach Kirby with a leg sweep and once again entrapped the trio in a Cyclone. But this time, he prevented them from re-grouping with his forward smash, first into Peach Kirby, then into Mario Kirby and finally into Luigi Kirby after a brief skirmish. Luigi Kirby was as tenacious as the plumber he copied!

Fifteen Kirbies had now dwindled to three. Two of them hung back while the third, wearing a doctor’s tool on his forehead, went to meet Luigi. Dr. Kirby launched some Megavitamins his way, but none of them hit. Now that it was less crowded, Luigi had greater freedom with his combos, utilizing most of the stage. Dr. Kirby stood no chance against a determined man in green. He was KO’d without even landing a single blow on Luigi!

The last two Kirbies stepped forward. Luigi’s heart slammed over and over against his chest as he drank them in. One of the Kirbies had curly, dark red hair and eyebrows, with a little gray near the edges. The other had tufts of red hair, horns and bushy, pronounced brows. He felt heat rising to his face and his throat knotting up. Although they were just Kirbies, it didn’t stop the words and the laughter from echoing in his mind.

_He had no idea how long Ganon had been in this room, watching the replay and laughing along with his best pal. But he could see him out of the corner of his eye, smirking as Koopa continued to rake him over the coals, chiming in with insults from time to time. He felt as if he was trapped in river rapids, heavy waves slamming into him everywhere. His lungs felt ready to explode any minute. His temples felt pounded by iron hammers. His soul felt violated, defiled. He wanted to scream at them. Get them. Hurt them—_

“Poy!”

Ganon Kirby waved an appendage in front of Luigi’s face, getting his attention. Luigi released a deep gasp as he returned to the present, drinking in the sympathetic look on Ganon Kirby’s face.

“Poyo, poyo, poyo, poyo, poy,” said Ganon Kirby.

“Poyo, po-poyo, poyoyo, poy, poyo, poyo,” added Koopa Kirby.

Luigi nodded. They weren’t the real deals. They were just Kirbies wearing a hat. That was all…

Ganon Kirby opened with a Warlock Punch, which Luigi easily sidestepped. He couldn’t help himself—he was so inflamed that he went all out on the two Kirbies, ensnaring them in Cyclones, combo-ing them harshly, pelting them with fireballs and switching from mainly strong attacks to mainly Smash attacks. Both Kirbies rebounded with their f-airs and specials several times, but their advantages didn’t last long. Ultimately, Luigi spiked Ganon Kirby off the stage using his d-air and chain-grabbed Koopa Kirby until his arms got tired, whereupon he finished the puffball with a Super Jump Punch.

Koopa Kirby let out a high-pitched yell as he was Star KO’d.

COMPLETE!

_Ganon, Koopa—if you’re watching this, then you got a preview of what’s to come._

“L, stay focused,” boomed Master Hand’s voice. “You’re not done with this stage yet.”

“What to do m…?” Luigi started to ask.

He was cut off when he heard a deep _boing_ sound behind him…

 

 

 


	12. 5-3: Kirby Horde

 

Slowly, Luigi turned. Standing there on one of the upper platforms was the hugest, roundest ball of pink adorableness he’d ever seen. His long, bean-shaped eyes reflected his opponent’s image like a mirror. Presently, his mouth curved into a small smile as he towered over the man in green.

“HIIIIIIIII!”

“A Giant Kirby,” breathed Luigi.

“POYO!” laughed Giant Kirby as he dropped down onto the main platform, causing the ground to tremble.

“You did such a good job with the other Kirbies that I decided to throw this one out,” explained Master Hand.

“Well—thanks,” said Luigi as he stared down Giant Kirby, evening his breaths and raising his fists. “We’re going to have a good time, aren’t we, Giant Kirby?”

“POY!”

READY…GO!

The orchestral cover of Green Greens was replaced by the frenetic rendition of Gourmet Race, the same tune playing during Luigi’s tangle with the 8 Kirbies two years ago. Knowing the dangers of stale moves, Luigi baited Giant Kirby a different way instead of throwing out fireballs. He wavedashed over to the edge, and Giant Kirby took the bait, attempting to grab him for a Kirbycide. Luigi dodged the large appendage, and instead of jabs, he launched right into his smashes. Upward-angled Trowel Stabs and breakdance sweeps. Hard-hitting head-butts. When he needed to retreat, that was where his roundhouse kick and Green Missile came in. Could he grab Giant Kirby? Would he be able to hold him long enough? After stunning the fluffy giant with a blow, Luigi took his gamble and seized Giant Kirby with both hands, pummeling him several times, and then heaved him downwards with a grunt. Giant Kirby bounced up like a ball, so Luigi snatched him out of thin air and slammed him again and again. After one slam, Luigi started one of his combos. He made this one fiercer than normal, due to his foe’s inflated size. But then Giant Kirby escaped, and Luigi felt himself being sucked up by a powerful vortex.

He was spat back out, and he turned to see Giant Kirby wearing his hat.

“I don’t think so,” he said calmly, sliding out of range of the giant fireballs thrown at him. He threw his own fireballs, before setting up a surprise aerial attack and following through with a combo on the ground, throwing and attacking. But here, Giant Kirby got blows of his own in. His Vulcan Jab. All of his specials. Even a few aerials and smash attacks. They dealt more damage and launched Luigi further. The increased damage only increased his power and adrenaline rush. Giant Kirby was shocked. Normally, his opponents would be begging for mercy by now! Perhaps he didn’t know Luigi as much as he thought.

 _Kirby peeped into the replay area and quickly wished that he hadn’t. There, on the monitors, in crisp detail, was Koopa, eyes full of rage and bloodlust, as he set upon Luigi with claws and spikes and kicks and slams. He was beating the poor man with savage blows until he could barely stand; still, he kept going. Despite this, Luigi hadn’t stopped fighting for even a moment, tweaking his battle plan again and again, laying on more Smash attacks and even halting Koopa’s offensive for a while. But his clever tactics eventually failed him as Koopa pounded and slashed him into submission, making him bleed all over himself and the stage. The images played again and again, Kirby managing to tear himself away only when he heard the voices. He flattened himself like a pancake against the wall so he could see without being seen. There was Koopa, his face inches from Luigi’s as he mocked him. His lips moved, and spittle sprinkled out on occasions, but Kirby’s innocent little mind, in some sort of defense mechanism, muted the sound of the words. There was Luigi, veins throbbing in his temple and neck, his face hard, his hands fists at his side, his eyes searing into his tormentor. There was Ganondorf, standing there with arms folded, head thrown back in laughter as he watched his friend give Luigi what he thought he deserved and tossing in his own two cents. Kirby felt himself slump to the floor, tears coming to his eyes. He couldn’t let those two treat Luigi like that! He had to tell someone! As quietly as he could, Kirby picked himself up and floated toward Master Hand’s office_ …

Giant Kirby was brought back to the present with a brutal knifehand thrust between his eyes, followed by a volley of hard blows. Luigi had him trapped against those yellow blocks, and as he continued to eat him up, Giant Kirby saw it all in the plumber’s eyes. The scars from the words spoken to him that day. His battle wounds had gone, but the words stayed with him. They motivated him to work harder and seek out areas for improvement, to drag himself out of bed every morning to train, to hold his own against the likes of 20XX and to make himself heard. While juggling with his up tilt and Cyclone, stabbing his hand into Giant Kirby till his fingers ached and kicking and throwing, Luigi knew that those two villains were wrong about him, and he yelled enthusiastically with each blow he landed, praying that they’d come back for him so he could tell them so.

Giant Kirby grabbed Luigi and did a back Suplex into the blocks, rocketing Luigi upward. Before he could follow up, the plumber spiked him with his downward kick, chucked him upward and threw his short hop f-airs, ending with a forward smash. And with one mighty blow, Luigi knocked Giant Kirby’s Copy Ability away.

For two minutes, they rallied, and they rallied hard. Mostly Smash attacks were exchanged between them. Giant Kirby’s size had its perks, but it was no match for Luigi’s power and strength. After taking a forward kick to the abdomen, Luigi rose to his feet, sweaty and bruised, and sucked in a deep breath. He locked his jaw as he strode toward Giant Kirby, removing everything else from his mind except for the oversized Star Warrior. Once he reached his opponent, he focused the sting from those words and the resentment towards those two into one of his fists, closed his eyes and then—

**PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGG!**

The Super Jump Punch hurled Giant Kirby clean out of the stage!

SUCCESS!

“Well done, L,” said MH. “You’ve just earned the Giant Kirby KO bonus.”

Luigi nodded in approval. “I just love these little bonuses,” he mused. “So, where to next?”

 

 


	13. 6-1: Corneria

It was a busy midmorning in Corneria. Over the futuristic city flew the Great Fox, the starship carrying the four members of the Star Fox crew. Its leader, Fox McCloud, stood atop the ship, staring out at the skyline as it floated past. Fox wore his usual white jacket, green shirt, red scarf, green pants and white boots. His golden-brown fur sparkled in the sunlight, and his cinnamon-brown eyes were watchful yet kind.

Fox allowed himself to drop onto his bottom, chin resting casually on his fists. He had to be one of the luckiest vulpines on Earth, fighting in a tournament like this. In 1999, he was quite favorable among the tournament players, but now—he was _the_ face of serious tournament play! In fact, he was considered the best fighter on the roster, occupying his own tier! Fox was number one on the tier list because of his swiftness, his Reflector, his ability to tech and his fast Blaster fire, among other attributes. His normal attacks were based on martial arts, either learned from his late father or picked up along his adventures. Fox immensely enjoyed being top tier and necked with high society at galas and events. A common joke in the Melee world was “No items, Fox only, Final Destination”. People flocked to get his autograph or a picture with him. He was a _god_. He was—20XX.

There was no idea how this 20XX fad got started, but it suited Fox McCloud just fine. 20XX had a nice—futuristic—ring to it. Those out to make it in the rough, competitive world of Melee wanted to main him, and his fellow Smashers wanted to _be_ him. You should hear the frustrated and exasperated cries each time the vulpine reflected a projectile, performed a “shinespike”, trapped his opponent in an “infinite shine” or did some cool techs with his Blaster, from the short hop laser to the short hop double laser. In any given match against Fox, there was always the “blip” of “the Shine”, his Blaster fire, his “Fiyahh!” from his Firefox move, his “Come on!” as a taunt and his “Mission complete” whenever he won. It was aggravating to some of the Smashers—until the tables turned and they found themselves in need of his skills during a Team Battle. Yes, SS tier and 20XX felt pretty great.

But just because he was top tier didn’t mean he was invincible. He learned that the hard way during embarrassing self-destructs brought on by his speed. His combo and KO abilities were enviable, but he was also lightweight and had the slowest air speed in the game. He was also easy to chain-grab and had an easily exploitable recovery. Firefox and Fox Illusion were good recovery options, but they could be read or intercepted. Still, Fox’s chest couldn’t help but swell at the thought of being “the God of Melee”.

“What are you thinking about?” boomed Master Hand’s voice.

“I don’t know,” murmured Fox. “I guess I’m thinking about how I got so popular.”

“Granted, you’ve shown me significant improvement in the past two years,” said MH, “but there are others who have improved, as well. Others who are not to be underestimated just because they’re on a lower tier than you.”

Fox smiled knowingly. “You’re talking about Luigi. Is he coming?”

“Yes, and he’s loaded for bear. Make yourself ready, Fox.”

“Okay.” Fox stood back up and stretched his muscles. A fight against Luigi would be an arduous one. He should know—he’d had his fair share of them and had seen almost the entire roster in such a match. Some had beaten him and some had lost. Some had handled their wins or losses against Luigi well. Others—not so much.

_Fox was seated with the “A team” of Melee—himself, Falco, Marth, Captain Falcon, Jiggs, Peach, Ice Climbers and Samus. Sam even had this green scarf to wave around as if she was cheering for a sports team. They were all snacking on nachos and stealing handfuls from a bag of caramel corn someone was generous enough to pass around. On the Battlefield were two fighters who deeply hated each other—Luigi and the Koopa King. Just by seeing the look on Luigi’s face, Fox knew that the turtle was about to enter the ninth circle of Hell. If Koopa wasn’t so despicable, then Fox would’ve felt sorry for him._

_What, exactly, was Hell in Melee? What could be correctly categorized as Melee Hell? When people used the term “Melee Hell”, they usually referred to Fox’s infinites. But, as Fox saw that day, there was a deeper core to Melee Hell, especially to people currently on Luigi’s bad side, like Koopa. He was turtle meat in an instant! If Luigi wasn’t chain-throwing him, then he was setting up impressive combos which could rival Fox’s. He was almost as fast, and Koopa was slow. Koopa show of physical superiority did him in—he must’ve forgotten that it also took brains and a well-thought-out plan to win a Smash battle! Luigi seemed to dance about that stage, a mix of defense and offense in his fighting style, but wholly aggressive, his jumps almost effortless, his attacks seeming so light but in reality hammering into his opponent’s flesh enough to make his eyes cloud over and glaze in pain. His voice permeated the stage and the stands; Fox knew that Luigi tended to shout sometimes during an intense match. But he didn’t know what made Luigi more passionate: the fact that Mario and Peach were in the front row, or Koopa’s tendency to call him “Green ’Stache” rather than by his real name._

_After a while, Fox had stopped looking at Koopa and instead focused on Luigi, pink-clad and lithe, sweaty and hot and cross and wired, breathing and grunting and hollering. Taking damage but not losing a stock—yet. The vulpine allowed himself to get swept away by the audience chanting Luigi’s name until he, too, was chanting it—he kinda looked down on Luigi for being mid-tier and all, but based on the sight before his eyes—the sweat-slathered figure working over a Nintendo villain as his eyes bore determination—the man in green deserved a spot next to him on the SS tier!_

_But he lost._

_Fox was in denial right up until they were in the reception area and Koopa was receiving the victor’s spoils. “Appalled” wasn’t the precise term to describe his feelings toward the reptile’s display during the awards ceremony. Openly mocking those who rooted for Luigi and snorting about how powerful he was as Luigi did his best to ignore him. After the ceremony, the day went on as usual. Until…_

_“Fox?” asked a feminine voice._

_“Hey, Peach. Come in,” said Fox._

_Peach stepped in, looking somber. “I just can’t believe it,” she breathed._

_“Me, neither. Luigi had him, and then…”_

_Peach shook her head. “Nobody told you yet.”_

_“About what?” asked Fox. “Is everything okay?”_

_“No,” said Peach. “Um—I walked in on Koopa having—words—with Luigi.”_

_“What?!” growled Fox._

_“He said some pretty savage things.”_

_“What kinds of things?”_

_Peach sat beside Fox and spilled every last detail of the rant she overheard. By the time she finished, Fox was boiling mad._

_“Where is that turtle?!”_

_Peach stopped him with a hand on his forearm. “He’s not worth it,” she said._

_“Where’s Luigi, then?” he asked in a softer tone._

_“In the Training Area. Door locked. He’s really upset,” sighed Peach. “Soon, everyone’s gonna find out what Koopa said to Luigi in there. But what’s coming to my kidnapper is worse than an angry mob on his tail.”_

_“What’s that?”_

_“You’ll see. And so will Koopa.”_

_Peach winked, stood and left the room._

“Can’t let you do that, Star Fox.”

Fox swiveled around, Blaster in hand, only to come face-to-face with his opponent. “Oh, it’s you!” he gasped.

Luigi sat on the back wing of the Great Fox, legs dangling. “Who else did you think it was?” he questioned.

“The only person who’s said that before is Wolf,” explained Fox.

“Well, I don’t see Wolf on the roster, so you’re safe—at least, from him.” Luigi hopped down from the wing and strolled toward Fox. “So, are you ready to remind me that you have your own tier all to yourself? I seemed to have ‘stepped out of my place’ lately. Do you hope to remind this lowly mid-tier of where he belongs?”

“Luigi, c’mon,” Fox said consolingly. “We’re still friends, and I still like you.”

“That’s not the way you’ve been acting lately,” Luigi said smartly. “Since you’re in the Melee limelight, you’re better than all of the rest, and you’re too good to hang around with your lower-tier buddies. Even Kirby.” He reached Fox and dropped his voice. “Do you have any idea of how the little guy has been dumped on over some piece of paper? I’ve seen you diss him sometimes—and don’t think I didn’t. The only person I don’t mind you sticking your nose up at is Koopa. Your attitude is tolerable compared to his.”

“I’m sorry about what he said to you that day,” said Fox. “I may have an ego and a superiority complex, but I’d never think such things about you. You’re flawed, but don’t forget that you faced your fears and saved your brother.”

“You’re just trying to butter me up,” murmured Luigi, “but I appreciate the concern you’re showing me right now. Nice to know that even 20XX doesn’t approve of that nonsense.”

Fox blushed. “Yeah—I really don’t know what to say with the 20XX stuff,” he admitted, “but I guess I’ve become somewhat of an icon.”

“You may be an icon, but you’re still an equal in my eyes,” Luigi said evenly. “I just don’t know if you think the same about me. First the business in 1999, and now _this_.” His face went to ice as he raised his fists. “Let’s see if 20XX and the SS tier alone can beat me.”

Fox put up his dukes as well. “They didn’t place me up there for nothing,” he chuckled.

READY—GO!

Luigi set his lips, wanting to reprimand Fox for his attitude, yet deciding to let him figure it out the hard way—again. He couldn’t let it bother him if he wanted to win—just how he couldn’t let Koopa’s words perturb him. As the battle began, the two shuffled about the Great Fox, Luigi waiting for the vulpine to execute some combo-starting move so he could evade and retaliate. He’d throw his fireballs if not for that Shine. No matter—there were other ways to exploit Fox. His notoriously fast speed could turn against him in a heartbeat, and he could be comboed as well as he could combo others.

But here, Fox was fighting defensively, sticking to his short hop single and double lasers and trying to get him to approach. Luigi wasn’t falling for that, for if he knew that if he was stuck in a 20XX combo, then it was game over. He dodged most of the lasers, but quite a few nicked him, causing a brief stinging sensation. There was a twinkle in Fox’s eyes—he hoped Luigi would unravel, lose patience and charge him. But the years of fixing sewage lines, toilets, sinks and faucets and fighting menacing turtles gave Luigi patience as well as strength. He knew there was a crack somewhere in that defensive strategy, but he just had to hang tight until he found it.

“I’m hardly even breaking a sweat,” laughed Fox after several minutes of this, twirling his Blaster in his fingers and then tossing it into the air and catching it. He then knelt and beckoned with one paw. “Come on, L!”

So preoccupied was Fox with his boasting and taunting that he didn’t see the kick coming.

Next thing he knew, he was flat on his back, his mouth filling with warm blood. He tried to roll backward, only to be met with a down smash. Luigi followed him into the air and began to let everything go with his karate chops and jump kicks, sending Fox back down with his twirling kicks and really making him suffer with his chain throws. He’d throw in a random smash attack to prevent things from going stale. He’d punch Fox all over his face, his shoulders, his chest, his abdominal region and over and behind his ears. He’d give him no time to activate his Reflector or use his lasers. If he dodged, then Luigi would read the dodge and really let him have it. If he shielded, then Luigi would break it with his powerful uppercut. Then, he got him to the stern of the starship, where it was just them and the back wall. Luigi would throw vicious Trowel Stabs, bouncing Fox off of the wall and back again, making an infinite combo of his own. His face was red, his mouth was in an “o” shape and he continuously alternated between fists and open hands and he kept Fox pinned in that painful spot. His tactics had Fox in confusion. He’d never fought anyone like this before! In his previous battles against Luigi, he’d given him everything, but never like the way he was doing now. He guessed the incident with Koopa had put in his mouth the taste to win and to hold nothing back so he’d be taken more seriously. Before that match, Luigi had been a regular in the Training Area and a green tidal wave on any given battle stage. It had relieved him of so much stress. Yet after that match, Luigi had woken up earlier to train. He made it clear that he wasn’t going to put up with any more cracks taken at him. He still won and lost well, but he was in a contemplative mood after a loss, watching the replays to figure out where he’d flubbed. About two weeks later, Fox looked at the main bulletin board to see Luigi’s name on the Adventure Mode sign-up list.

The thing which entranced Fox the most while watching Luigi fight was his face. He had the type of facial expressiveness unlike the others on the roster, thanks to those brilliant blue eyes. Throughout his battles, Luigi’s facial expression changed a lot. He’d have a solemn, neutral look which warned opponents of what was coming to them. An intense look, bursting with concentration, but never mean or intimidating. A committed, determined look. A cold, defiant look for opponents giving him a hard time off the battlefield. Heck, even his “pain face” was hypnotizing to watch. Each look would have just a hint of nerves and a dash of guarded confidence, but he’d always convey respect with his face. He’d always adhere to battlefield etiquette, even if his foe didn’t.

But being on the battlefield with him was different from watching him from the stands. The concentrated energy he saw on that face was enough to send thrills of doubt down Fox’s body. Luigi’s movements made Fox question his perceived infallibility. Nobody was purely infallible, after all. But Luigi was right—as soon as Fox saw his ranking, he started acting as if he was sitting on top of the world, like he was some sort of VIP. He’d also experienced a high ranking in the first tournament, coming in at number four on the A tier—and he’d acted almost the same way. But this time—it was getting ridiculous. He was probably no better than Koopa!

That being said, Fox had been unprepared for Luigi’s offensive. The plumber had waited for Fox to start taunting, and bam. He was his, from start to finish. The vulpine never even got to pull off a single Fox Illusion, or a “shinespike” or an “infinite shine”—not even a Firefox! No—he was trapped between the back wing of the Great Fox and the strong fists of the man in green. The higher Fox’s damage grew, the more his opponent whaled away at him. His precious Reflector was probably broken by now. Luigi kept going and going until he nearly ran out of breath. Finally, he grabbed Fox, swung him thrice and hurled him off the craft.

SUCCESS!

Now, it was Luigi’s turn to plop down where he stood, composing himself. He never thought he’d be so upset at Fox over his behavior, but he was. One taunt was all it took for him to have his window of opportunity slammed shut in his face. Hopefully, he’d finally learn something from this.

Little did he know, three Arwings were flying toward the Great Fox to spice things up a bit.

“I’ve found our prey!” warned Fox’s co-pilot, Falco Lombardi. “Stay clear!”

“Get ready, everybody!” shouted Peppy Hare.

“I’m right behind you guys!” Slippy Toad chimed in.

 

 

 

 

 


	14. 6-2: Corneria, Cont'd

Luigi was brought from his thoughts by the whine of airplane engines. He looked up to see the three Arwings flying his way.

“Hi, Luigi!” a familiar voice called from one of the Arwings.

“Hi, Falco!” Luigi called back. Though Falco Lombardi was also tied to this 20XX nonsense and was right behind Fox on the tier list, it was difficult to stay upset with him. Falco and Luigi came from similar linguistic and cultural backgrounds, so Luigi’s affinity with the avian was pretty strong.

“Don’t get too comfy down there!” warned Falco. “You’ve got another round with Fox coming up. And this time, you’ll have our Arwing lasers to deal with!” He laughed as he flew out.

“Okay…” Luigi said to himself, placing his hands in his lap, closing his eyes and retreating back into himself. Another round with Fox. Arwing lasers. He’d recognized the setting—during 1P Mode, he fought and trounced McCloud atop this very ship, except that it was in space instead of Corneria. The stage strategies were also the same, except that Luigi had sharpened them for this go-round. So, Fox was coming back for him. Hopefully, he’d come with a strategy more effective than spamming his Blaster and trying to provoke his opponent.

While Luigi was in a deep, meditative state, Master Hand was getting Fox ready for round two. “What was that?” he demanded as the vulpine changed into a new pair of clothes.

“Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,” shrugged Fox. “I figured that if I took a defensive stance, Luigi would fall right into my trap.”

“Trust me, he’s keen enough to sense what his opponents are up to,” said MH. “He’s not the same, timid guy you fought against two years ago. He’s lost some matches and learned from them, rather than acting salty about it.”

“You should’ve seen the look on his face back there,” said Fox. “He once told me that he’s going to give me his all, and he’s not reneging on that promise!”

“Indeed, something’s up with him,” murmured MH. “His attitude has been noticeably more competitive since the day he fought Koopa. He looks at that turtle, and he gets really angry. I hear him muttering about Koopa, too. Did something—happen between them?”

“Luigi really wanted to win. That way, Koopa would know that he was as much of an obstacle as Mario,” Fox explained.

“Luigi should know that winning isn’t everything here,” said MH. “The important thing was that he fought his best.”

Fox sighed. “Koopa just doesn’t know how to win or lose properly,” he told MH. “Leave it at that.”

The vulpine was now clad in a red and orange ensemble. His Reflector was as good as new, and he’d recharged his Blaster. “Well, here we go again,” he muttered.

MH gave him a friendly pat on the back. “Just be yourself,” he advised before teleporting away.

Fox emerged back onto the roof of the starship and waved to his three friends as they zipped by on their Arwings. His gaze was riveted on Luigi, seated pretzel-style, eyes closed, sweating from their first tussle but relatively unscathed. “L!” he shouted.

Luigi’s eyes snapped open, meeting Fox’s brown orbs, his face tight. “Come for second helpings?” he asked.

“You wanna play rough?!” yelled Fox over the roar of Arwing engines. “I’m cool with that! Come on—let’s play rough!”

Luigi stood back up and approached Fox. “Okeydokey.”

The two met in the middle and raised their fists at the same time, feeling their shared aggression rising. Fox wasn’t going to rein in the beast this time around. If Luigi wanted his taste of homegrown 20XX, then he was going to get it! But Luigi kept his jaw locked as he stared Fox down. The top tier vulpine wanted to take a second shot at him, and he was perfectly okay with that! 20XX wasn’t long for the world of Smash!

“You want 20XX?” Fox asked Luigi in a low voice. “Huh? You want it? Then come on, man. Take it. Take it.”

READY—GO!

Fox opened round two with a strong forward kick, but Luigi sidestepped and sent his knifehand thrust into Fox’s hip. The three Arwings zipped around the two fighters, firing lasers at random. The sound of laser fire cannoned down Luigi’s bloodstream as he unleashed a combination of punches, chops, kicks and throws on the more aggressive Fox. The vulpine wasted no time reading or trying to read Luigi’s movements, pushing him away with his Shine and using his laser techs as edgeguards and combo set-ups instead of defense. One famous combo of Fox’s was an up throw into an up smash and a u-air. His up throw could combo into a lot of moves, by the way. Oh, he’d learned the first time, and he was being himself. He wanted to leave bruises on this plumber, nasty and ugly bruises which would stay for weeks. He wanted to see him bleeding and wincing in pain. He wanted to see—wait a second, what was he thinking? This was a fighting tournament, but not a battle to the death! Well, Luigi brought it on himself, getting all in his face, hooking him, chain-throwing him and making colors swirl before his eyes with his smash attacks. Fox saw Luigi’s Timex sports watch glinting on his wrist, surprised that it hadn’t broken with the force of his blows. He saw the beads and bands of sweat covering him. He saw the fireflies dancing in his slightly dilated pupils. He saw his slightly parted and rounded mouth, his respirations sounding angry. Or, his lips would be closed, and Fox would see Luigi’s tongue, sometimes moving and other times just staying curled over his upper lip. As the Arwings fired around them, a heated fight ensued between the two, both of them going combo crazy and using all parts of the Great Fox to their advantage, from the spacious bow to the top of the back wing to the death trap that was the stern. Luigi loved to force Fox to hang onto the back wing and then shyly kick him off and follow him to the stern area. They also exchanged punches while balanced on the turbines, or at the bottom of the bow, where the huge lasers stored there tended to charge and fire periodically.

But most of all, Luigi and Fox wanted to make friends out of the Arwing lasers. Whenever they saw one of those crafts coming, they’d craftily knock the opponent straight into its trajectory. These lasers hurt more than Fox’s Blaster, which he sometimes used to blow Luigi into one of the Arwings. But Luigi also tended to use his fireballs whenever Fox tried to escape from Arwing fire. He could hear the whoops and cries of the Arwing pilots as they did all sorts of tricks around the mother ship, even barrel rolling into Luigi a few times, nearly knocking him away. And the two would find themselves on a random Arwing, their breaths harshly whistling into each other’s ears as they fought close—that is, until the pilot barrel rolled them off and flew away.

Arwing lasers, Blaster fire and Firefox flames shone in a spectacular show over Corneria. Green fire lit up the sky. Bodies flipped into the air, were slammed to the floor and balanced on the Great Fox. Fox cut off Luigi’s approaches with the Fox Illusion and followed up before the plumber hit the ground. He loved his new side special and the way it caught his foes off guard! The downside was that an Arwing’s lasers could cut him off, or he’d wind up in those lasers at the end of the move. But it could also send Luigi upwards into heavy Arwing fire.

Try as he might, however, Fox couldn’t shinespike Luigi or lay an infinite shine on him. He was too fast and too smart. He’d smash attack his face and then go for the body, especially his waist so he could crack that Reflector again. Fox peered closely at Luigi again. He was bloodied and bruised, burned from lasers and still bursting with aggression. The vulpine’s muzzle and snout ached, and he, too, tasted blood. As Falco, Slippy and Peppy soared in from all directions, laughing and peppering both fighters with their lasers, Fox’s shouts joined Luigi’s in an amazing symphony as blows continued to hail on bodies, neither refusing to give in regardless of their injuries.

Luigi kicked Fox into the wing of the mother ship and bounced him back and forth for a while using his forward smash, angling it differently with each hit. For the grand finale, he charged himself up and then misfired into Fox’s stomach, sending the vulpine straight into an Arwing blast.

“UUWAAAAAAAAA!” screamed Fox as he was Star KO’d.

GAME!

“Fooooooooooooox!” shrieked Slippy.

“Aw, he’ll be okay,” Falco assured him. “Right, L?”

Luigi nodded. “Right.”

“Way to tussle!” Peppy joined in. “What’s your secret?”

“Practice and plenty of rest. You know—eat your green vegetables,” Luigi said to him.

“All right, Luigi—we’d better get going,” said Falco. “See ya round!”

“Yeah,” said Luigi. “See ya.”

“Do a barrel roll!” commanded Peppy, and with that, the Star Fox crew had disappeared.

“That was actually one of the most challenging stages of this adventure,” gushed MH, “and you beat it!”

“That’s because I put my mind to it,” Luigi said humbly.

“Good for you,” said MH. “Now, this next stage is different because it only has one part, but you still have to be quick on your feet. Think you can handle it?”

Luigi nodded. “Sure, I can!”

 


	15. 7: Pokemon Stadium

Master Hand placed Luigi on a simple looking platform with a Pokèball symbol on it. The design of the main platform was akin to a basketball court. “Recognize this place?” he asked.

“The Pokémon Stadium,” breathed Luigi, “and let me guess—I’m going to fight a Pokémon?”

“Not one of them,” clarified MH. “Twelve of them. Most of them will be Pikachus, but you’ll also find some Jigglypuffs and a few Pichus.”

“Pikachu and Pichu. Shocking,” said Luigi.

“Luckily, there will be Pokèballs available for you to use,” MH went on. “Just be sure to get your hands on them before your opponents do.”

“12 opponents. Pokèballs. Got it,” said Luigi as his foes came into view.

“Pika, pika!” greeted Pikachu with a wave, seven of his brethren behind him. Some of the Pikachus wore hats, while the others had different-colored skin.

“Good to see you, too, Pikachu,” said Luigi. His feelings toward the electric mouse had been complex as of late. During the first go-round, they had been good friends despite Pikachu being top tier. Then again, Pikachu wasn’t a snob about it. But in Melee, Luigi and Pikachu started getting into it over the similarities between their side specials. The latter attested that the Green Missile was naught but a remixed version of Skull Bash, which was created first, in 1998. Luigi defended his handy side special and insisted that no copyright infringement had been intended during the creation of the move. This sparked an on-and-off, sometimes bitter, feud which even got physical at times. Koopa and Ganondorf had used the feud as an excuse to further hate on Luigi, and even Marth—he didn’t want to even think about the nasty prank he’d pulled on him prior to a match, culminating in an embarrassing forfeit. Eventually, Marth got his conscience back and apologized, but Luigi’s closeness to the Altean prince would probably take years to repair.

This and more went through Luigi’s mind as he looked over the eight Pikachus. Then, a high-pitched “Pichu!” caused him to jerk his head up. Joining the eight Pikachus were two Pichus, one of them wearing a headband. Pikachu’s little buddy naturally sided with him during the side special feud and often spent his free time trying to get Melee fans to join his side. Yet the baby mouse tended to cuddle up with the man in green during cease-fires. Luigi cracked a small smile at Pichu and his little teammate. Pichu’s moves were similar to Pikachu’s, but some of them caused him to hurt himself. After all, he was still a baby. Once he learned how to control his electricity, he’d evolve into Pikachu and be ready for some serious battling!

“Jiggly!”

Rounding out the 12 Pokémon pitted against Luigi were two Jigglypuffs. The first Jiggs was her usual pink self, and the second wore a green headband. Luigi and Jiggs had been uber-friendly since the first tournament, as they made up two of the Formidable Four secret fighters. The sleepy Balloon-type had been moderately buffed in between tourneys, but she held fast to her old and new friendships. Jiggs was upset that Pikachu would argue with his best friend over some move in Smash and sought to deflate the tension between them. She also warned that this animosity was adversely impacting Pikachu’s relationship with Kirby, the puffball having turned to the Balloon-type for comfort.

But enough talk of that.

Eight Pikachus. Two Pichus. Two Jigglypuffs. Pokèballs aplenty. One level of the stage. The twelve quickly scurried to other parts of the Stadium—on upper platforms and on both sides of the main platform, totally surrounding Luigi. He lanced them with a blazing, smoldering stare, recalling the fighting and yelling and backlashing and—

READY—GO!

Behind the stadium, a Jumbo Tron projected magnified images of the battle for the large audience to see, along with the fighter currently in the lead. This stadium was located in the Kanto region, where Jigglypuff was from. Since Kanto was in a different time zone, night had fallen, and fireworks occasionally exploded into the sky as Luigi battled the 12 pocket monsters.

The eight Pikachus led the assault, with the two Jigglypuffs bringing up the rear, being the lightest and thus the most vulnerable. Eight currents of electricity slammed into Luigi, flinging him high into the air. The Jiggs with the green headband met him there, chaining her f-airs into a Wall of Pain. Luigi broke out with a karate chop and a n-air, fastfell back to the ground and executed a Cyclone which scattered the Pikachus. He then kept them at bay with his fireballs while deciding which opponent to take on first. A Pikachu answered the question for him, hitting him with a fully charged Skull Bash. Sharply, Luigi poked his hand at the Pikachu and one-upped him with a misfire, KO-ing him. These must be lightweight fighters!

“Pika!” A thunderbolt crashed down upon Luigi, causing him to spasm briefly. He recovered in time to see the Pikachus regroup and dash at him again. They assailed him mercilessly with their white-hot electricity, but Luigi had grown used to these electric attacks. He fought back with equal vigor, leaving his strong attacks behind and going for the Smash attacks, sending Pikachu after Pikachu rocketing beyond the blast lines. When his smashes, aerials and specials weren’t enough, Luigi remembered to utilize the Pokèballs laying around. Most of them carried Legendary Pokémon which unleashed attacks powerful enough to clear out a room. But more often than not, Luigi would wind up with a Goldeen. At least the Pokèball itself did damage when Luigi hurled it at an opponent.

At certain intervals, the stage itself would transform. Each alternate form of the stage represented the different Pokémon types: Fire, Earth, Ice and Water. There would be walls for Luigi to trap his lightweight foes against or for them to do unto him in that fashion. There would be collapsible portions which damaged fighters. And there would be areas where the fighters skidded around, notably the Ice-type stage. Each form brought their own unique flavor to the battle, the spectators eating it up, some of them cheering for the Pokémon and some of them cheering for Luigi.

By now, Luigi had defeated the two Pichus and most of the Pikachus. Only the Jigglypuffs and three Pikachus remained. The Pichus had been easy to defeat; all that Luigi had to do was bait them to use the moves which damaged them, rack up the damage points and then land the finishing blow. But the three remaining Pikachus had grown extremely aggressive, as had the Jiggs with the green headband.

Well, fine. So would he.

Flicking his tongue about his lips, Luigi engaged the Pikachus first with his long-ranged and strong attacks, pushing them away with Cyclones and trying to get misfired Missiles just to spite them. He had nothing personal against Pikachu, but his antics during their feud left him a bit raw. They were supposed to be friends! Why did they have to fight over something as trivial as this? Now and then, Luigi would yell out as harder blows met the flank of the electric mice. In addition to electricity, the Pikachus tripped Luigi with tail swipes and stunned him with hard head strikes. They grabbed him and threw him to their teammates to pound (literally in Jiggs’s case). But Luigi would cleverly slide out of range of Jiggs’s Rest attack and pop her high into the air with his low heel kick. He liked to launch himself like a rocket into an entire group of opponents, drinking in the way they scattered like smoldering dice. His misfires could knock the wind out of some of them, too. But in a situation when a Super Jump Punch was out of the picture, Luigi preferred to slam an unfortunate foe out of the ballpark with his Green Missile. As soon as his Trowel Stab, karate chops, breakdance sweeps or other advantageous moves gave sufficient damage, Luigi would crouch down, close his eyes, build up his energy and let himself fly. The wind would scream past his ears, and his head would encounter an opponent, his green hat softening the blow to his cranium. The slight headache was worth seeing his opponent flying into oblivion, especially when the opponent was Pikachu, Fox, Marth, Ganon—or Koopa!

_He’d primed himself so he’d get plenty of misfires that day, knowing that they’d work wonders on that hulking frame. However, he stopped short of spamming the Green Missile, fearing that Koopa would catch on. In this battle, his misfires were useful in knocking the wind from the beast, availing him for use as a Smashing bag. One could argue that Luigi had been uncharacteristically brutal that day, but the animosity between him and Koopa ran deep. The overgrown turtle was a serial disrespecter, and Luigi was the oft-disrespected. Not to mention a certain Mushroom Princess hoping to see the day her enemy got what he deserved and a brother who had to deal with Koopa’s crap for nearly two decades!_

_Over Koopa’s roars, his exclamations and the sounds of claws, fists, feet and other stuff making their mark, Luigi heard the cheers. First, Mario’s cheers, his signature chipper falsetto carrying above everyone else, yelling in Italian as well as English. Well, Luigi had to get his vocal cords from someone! Dancing with Mario’s cheers were Peach’s cheers, the voices of two of the people he cared about most on God’s green earth at the forefront of Luigi’s eardrums. DK made encouraging ape noises as Link and Zelda sent up some kind of Hylian war chant. Samus hollered tomboyishly, Marth and our boy Roy cheered in Japanese and Ness tried to get a clapping cheer started. There were Douglas’s usual exhortations to show moves, Fox and Falco’s whooping and Kirby’s squeals of “POYO!” Mr. Game and Watch beeped excitedly, and Nana and Popo shouted Luigi’s name and knocked their hammers together. Mewtwo and Ganon were the only ones not cheering._

_But what really surprised Luigi was the familiar “Pika” and “Pichu” ringing through the skies. He’d been on the outs with those two because of that stupid dispute. But he was touched, knowing deep in his heart that Pichu and Pikachu decided to let bygones be bygones in order to support him in his showdown with a brutish bully!_

_And after Luigi lost and the words had been said, he and Pikachu agreed to cast that stupid clash aside once and for all. It wasn’t important, anyway. Koopa’s actions that day took precedence over what trivial issue they had with each other. Pikachu would happily spar with Luigi when Mario, Fox or another regular sparring partner was unavailable, and he’d apologize profusely over the way he’d been acting. In time, the rift between those two Smashers was close to being healed._

Luigi had smashed the last of the Pikachus and one Jiggs out of the arena. Now, one Jiggs stood facing him. The one with the green headband.

“Puff!” she cried.

Luigi waited as Hungrybox Jiggs floated toward him and then threw a quick overhand punch, short hopped into a n-air and topped off with three f-airs. He drilled Hbox Jiggs into the stage and began chain-grabbing and chain-throwing her. He swirled her into Cyclones. He Smash attacked, trying to launch her upward onstage and downward offstage. But this Jiggs was surprisingly aggressive, using her f-air, b-air and Rollout, singing him to sleep to try and sneak attack him and trying to launch him skyward with Rest. But Luigi had seen all of Hbox Jiggs’s tricks before, and he wasn’t about to fall for any of them! He baited, tricked and punished heavily, throwing Pokèballs along the way. He escaped from many Walls and Fences of Pain. And when Hbox Jiggs tried Rest, Luigi waited for her to wake up before—

**PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG!**

“Jigglypuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuff!” Hbox Jiggs screamed as she flew offstage.

GAME!

“You and Pikachu aren’t going into it over you-know-what, are you?” questioned MH.

“Master Hand, trust me when I say that those days are behind us,” Luigi said smartly.

MH nodded. “Good. Are you ready for some grand prix action?”

“Grand prix?” Luigi raised an eyebrow. “Why? What do you mean?”

“Because for this next stage,” explained MH, “you’ll be in a grand prix.”

**I wanna be the very best**

**like no one ever was!**

**To catch them is my real test**

**To train them is my cause!**

 

**I will travel across the land**

**searching far and wide**

**Each Pokémon to understand**

**the power that's inside!**

 

**Pokémon!**

**It’s you and me**

**I know it’s my destiny!**

**Pokémon!**

**Oh you're my best friend**

**in a world we must defend!**

**Pokémon!**

**A heart so true**

**Our courage will pull us through!**

 

**You teach me and I'll teach you…**

**Pokémon!**

**Gotta catch 'em all!**

 

**Every challenge along the way**

**with courage I will face!**

**I will battle every day**

**to claim my rightful place!**

**Come with me,**

**the time is right,**

**there's no better team!**

**Arm in arm we'll win the fight!**

**It's always been our dream!**

 

**Pokémon!**

**It’s you and me**

**I know it’s my destiny!**

**Pokémon!**

**Oh you're my best friend**

**in a world we must defend!**

**Pokémon!**

**A heart so true**

**Our courage will pull us through!**

**You teach me and I'll teach you…**

**Pokémon!**

**Gotta catch 'em all!**

 

**Gotta catch em' all, yeah!!!!!!!!!!**

 

**Pokémon!**

**It’s you and me**

**I know it’s my destiny!**

**Pokémon!**

**Oh you're my best friend**

**In a world we must defend!**

**Pokémon!**

**A heart so true**

**Our courage will pull us through**

**You teach me and I'll teach you…**

**Pokémon!**

**Gotta catch 'em all!**

 

**Gotta catch 'em all!**

**POKÉMON!**

 

 

 

 

 


	16. 8-1: F-Zero Grand Prix

“What?!” Luigi shrieked at Master Hand as he stood on a racetrack. “Are you serious?! You actually want me to…?!”

“Do I look like I’m smiling to you?” challenged Master Hand. “Look, with your ridiculous wavedashing, you’ll clear this course in no time. And I’ll make this easier on you by sending you a little warning signal when the racecars are approaching.”

“I still can’t believe you’re leaving me at the mercy of those things!” snapped Luigi. “Do you know how fast they’re going?! Do I look like I want to be hit by tons of metal going at supersonic speeds?!”

“If you want to quit and try this again at a later time…”

“No! I didn’t say that!” shouted Luigi. “It’s just—what made you think of something like this? Were you on shrooms or something?!”

“Luigi, I assure you, I was perfectly sane when planning all of the Adventure Mode stages,” said MH. “Like I said, you don’t have to continue with this if you don’t want to.”

“Well, I do,” Luigi said sharply.

“No need to get upset, L. I didn’t mean to offend you,” said MH.

“I know. But I had to muddle through a lot of challenges to even get here. There’s no way I’m turning back now.”

MH nodded. “I like your style. Oh, and by the way, you get a head-start over the racecars. So, it’s not all bad.”

“Perfect.” Luigi steadied his nerves and took his mark on the F-Zero racetrack. “There had better be a heaping amount of G with my name on it at the end of this whole shebang, that’s all I’m saying.”

READY—GO!

A hard rock version of “Big Blue” started playing over the sound system. Something about this rendition got to Luigi as he hit the racetrack at a full sprint. During this foot race, he noticed small platforms above him, reasoning that he could use them to avoid the F-Zero racecars. Sometimes, trophies waited on these platforms, which Luigi snagged without even dropping pace. Even with these circumstances, Luigi fancied a good run. Running got his mind off of things, as he was wholly focused on pumping his legs and saving precious energy and breath. Running sent aggression not released by sparring or matches tumbling out of his system. Running cleansed him as he pulled in lungfuls of air, stimulated his cardiovascular system and burned calories and fat. Various foods and drinks were placed out for him to use, and he’d simply pluck them out as he dashed past.

Just then, Luigi saw a flashing, yellow triangle with an exclamation mark on it and heard a series of low-pitched beeps. Thinking quickly, he hopped onto one of the platforms and watched as the racecars whizzed under him.

“This is crazy,” he murmured as he jumped back down and continued streaking down the raceway. He had no idea how much farther it was till the finish line or how constantly he had to watch for those cars. But one things for sure—he didn’t want to be run over!

Whenever his legs started aching, he followed MH’s advice and honed his wavedashing skills. He seemed to glide across the racetrack as the timer ticked down. He could even see the finish line up ahead! The man in green smiled to himself. Wavedashing saved the day!

Or maybe not.

The warning symbol and sound flashed again. Luigi immediately skidded to a halt and jumped toward the nearest platform. What he didn’t count on was the racecars traveling diagonally upward instead of straight.

“Whoa!” he exclaimed, dodging out of the way in the nick of time. He could feel and hear his heart doing over a hundred-fifty. _Dio_ , were his legs shaking? “Master Hand—this is really crazy!”

_“You can’t even stomach an adventure all by yourself, can you?”_

Luigi froze in his tracks.

_“You probably wouldn’t have gone in that mansion if it weren’t for Mario being stuck in there!”_

“No, that’s not true!” argued Luigi.

_“I think you just want to use these tournaments as an excuse to act big. How does MH even accept people like you? Oh, right—you’re just looking for bodyguards so you won’t wind up a bloody pulp somewhere! Too bad—they did nothing to help you today! GWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAA!”_

“Get out of my head!” yelled Luigi.

_“Sorry, Greenie, but it looks like you’re too puny for this type of thing. So do us a favor and go home!”_

“STOP IT!”

Koopa’s sadistic laughter echoed in his brain. Along with someone else’s. Ganondorf’s. Racecars all but forgotten, Luigi focused his reignited fury on the finish line before him. Like a flying shot, the man in green rocketed across the tarmac, disregarding the trophies now, and blazed across the finish line before Master Hand even had time to sound the warning.

SUCCESS!

“What were you screaming about back there?” MH demanded.

Luigi looked at him with glistening eyes. “There was a voice inside my head, taunting me, telling me that I couldn’t do it,” he explained. “Guess I just proved it wrong.”

“The good news is that the second part of this stage is relatively simpler,” winked MH. “Just a gimmick-free Melee match.”

“And I know who the opponent is,” nodded Luigi.

 

 


	17. 8-2: Mute City

Douglas Jay Falcon, F-Zero champion and bounty hunter, stood at the Mute City racetrack, preening. He wore his usual blue-and-gold racer outfit which showed off his awesome abdominals. A gold scarf was tied around his neck, and a helmet and mask concealed his hair and eyes. His face was handsome and chiseled, a hit with the ladies, and his charm had won him the affections of a certain Intergalactic Bounty Hunter when the Original Twelve first met up. Captain Falcon had become a meme-tastic Smasher, courtesy of his conveniently falcon-shaped “FALCOOOOOOOOOOON PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWNCH!”

“YES!” interjected Captain Falcon as he anticipated the adventurer coming his way. A very interesting fighter, this one, who never failed to surprise anybody—or prove them wrong. Luigi was a pivotal part of the good Captain’s life in Smash from the get-go, the heart and the spine of the Formidable Four. How else could they survive the tiny cracks such as: “You’re a secret character; we haven’t unlocked you yet”? How else could they stand out from the other eight? You made a statement, and Luigi had grown increasingly proficient at that.

Then, Douglas bit his lip, remembering the flip side of the coin that was his friendship with the man in green. It was the racer who’d bestowed the name of “the last-place loser” upon Luigi one unforgettable, regrettable and drunken night—the night the tier list was first released, no less. Initially ranked 3rd on the A tier, he’d joined Fox McCloud in belittling, harassing and pranking the bottom-tier plumber. Falcon could expertly recall the various bathroom pranks which made up their repertoire, the gloating sessions they had on their blogs and how they’d rubbed their high rankings in during their matches. It got so bad that Luigi flipped out on him during a match at Hyrule Castle, and he was nearly disqualified from a free-for-all against the racer and Fox shortly thereafter. Falcon finally saw the light after his recklessness caused Luigi to win over him by doing absolutely nothing, the man in green visibly agitated and railing at him in the aftermath. It took a while, but he eventually won Luigi back over, along with the rest of the Formidable Four. Both he and Fox had apologized to the Smashers and vowed never to let their high rankings get to them like that again.

That had been two years ago. In Melee, Douglas had been slightly nerfed, now occupying the B tier, and saw it as karma brought on by his display in ’99. But his pal, Fox, had been buffed all the way to the top! Apparently, the promise he’d made was left in the dust as the vulpine quickly adopted a fabulous-me, too-cool-for-everyone-else attitude, talking about how he was a “Melee God” and rambling about 20XX. Falcon was known to the serious tournament players as 20GX, and though he was nerfed, he was considered along the “Melee Elite”. Still, he couldn’t help but worry over Fox’s acting like a celebrity, fretting that he’d push the entire roster away like both of them almost did in ’99.

Especially with Luigi, who’d developed an instinctive mistrust toward the higher-tier fighters in between tournaments. He was pulled out of the rut of being bottom-tier, and he certainly wasn’t acting like Mr. Moneybags! When was Fox going to learn to stop thumbing his nose at people just because of some list?

“Captain Falcon.”

Douglas looked up at the sound of his name. The man he’d waited for stood across from him on the platform, his face expressionless, eager and somber all at once. Falcon had never seen him wear a sports watch before, and it looked good on him. By the pace of Luigi’s breaths and the slight band of perspiration, the good Captain could tell that he’d run a marathon to get here. Which was true—he had to traverse an entire racetrack to progress here!

“Luigi,” Falcon replied, standing erect and striding confidently toward him.

Mixed emotions danced on Luigi’s face as he drank in his friend. He’d never forget the night when Douglas stumbled in, dead drunk, yelling about what a loser he was and calling him a _name_. Luigi himself had been imbibing, but not as much as the interloper, and he’d been dancing it off, as well. But after putting up with stuff like this all day, Luigi had reached his limit. He’d rolled up his sleeves and let all of his aggression float to the surface. And the song playing as the duo slugged it out—“The Rocky Road to Dublin”. Quite fitting.

However, that was two years ago, and Luigi was willing to forgive and forget—at least, in Falcon’s case. He had more unapologetic tormentors to deal with—most notably a reptilian monarch who got a kick out of snatching peachy princesses and a certain Gerudo who’d stop at nothing to use the Triforce to take over Hyrule!

“You look ready to try and beat the snot out of me,” stated Luigi in a soft, level voice, the waves of adrenaline in his chest and ribcage good to feel. “Shall we begin?”

“Sure, let’s get to it!” Falcon happily replied, positioning a fighting stance.

“That’s it? No flippant or rude comments?”

Falcon smiled. “I learned the first time, L.”

READY—GO!

“Show me ya moves!” challenged Douglas, snapping off a crisp salute.

And Luigi did just that, once he got the mighty Falcon to approach him. But could the racer handle his moves? They were radically different from 1999, though still similar to Mario’s. Luigi had crafted his own identity as a Smasher when he returned for Melee, practicing his new moves privately before a mirror and then dazzling everyone with them during the exhibition matches. He was more than willing to show them off to Mr. Show Me Ya Moves. Especially after the way he acted last time. He wasn’t last place anymore, and he sure wasn’t a loser! Try as he might, Luigi couldn’t stop the memories of that fateful day, not his match against Koopa but the day the first tier list was posted on the bulletin board, from invading him. Mario had known about it, yet instead of coming out and saying it, he told a lie by omission. Rather than letting it poison him, he stood firm against it, comforting the others who were low-ranked and taking a guarded stance around the higher tiers. He wrote eloquently about it on the Smash blog, defied his foes to laugh at him during battles, sparred with dummies, Polygons and friends or simply danced it off to 90s pop. And on that day, as he sought to recover from stolen hopes, Captain Falcon showed up and threw gas onto his blazing fire. His mini-tirade rang in his ears along with that song as he threw punches and fireballs, Douglas punching back but unable to stand a chance against him. As the fight reached its climax, something popped loose inside of Luigi, making him shout louder than he’d ever shouted in his life. And the exact same thing was happening now, powerful, wordless interjections vomiting from his lungs as he launched into a no-holds-barred display of his moves. Cyclones, misfired Missiles, Super Jump Punches and all of his Smashes. Up or down throws into aerial chops and kicks. Back throws for spacing. Fireballs for retreating. Dodging and feinting. Concentrating. Releasing. The Big Blue theme had been replaced by the Mute City theme as the plumber took on the racer, trying to spike him with his d-air or his shy dirt kick of a taunt, slamming his knifehand thrusts into Falcon’s waist and abdomen, chain-throwing, pummeling and kicking. The platform they were fighting on moved through the racetrack, depositing them in certain areas for short periods of time, the warnings letting them know when it was about to take off again. There were also those racers to deal with, and they try to send the opponent into their wake for a whopping 10% damage per hit. This part of the stage was interesting, but at least it beat out racing for one’s life from those speed demons!

“FALCOOOOOOOON—PAAAAAAWWWWWNNNNCH!”

The infamous, fiery punch cannoned into Luigi’s midsection, and he felt himself leave the ground, pain exploding all over him. Then, the stage rushed up to give him a big, sloppy kiss as Douglas rushed over to follow up with his down smash, a Raptor Boost, and jumping to finish with a Falcon Dive.

“YESSSSSS!”

Slightly dazed, Luigi rolled back to a standing position, his eyes focusing back on his opponent. Every fiber of his body prepared to dodge the next rush, but Falcon just stood there, chest puffed out, smiling.

“Show me ya moves!” he said again.

Agitated, Luigi blasted air between his lips and held his ground, refusing to rush headlong into the Captain’s trap. He couldn’t afford to make mistakes like that. Instead, he danced about, shooting fireballs with a snap of his fingers, penetrating deep with his eyes, begging Falcon to keep up his taunting. Falcon attempted a Falcon Kick, but Luigi smoothly slid out of the way and spun into him with two Cyclones, then grabbed him and chucked him upwards for another combo. Falcon DI’d away and got even with another Falcon Punch, plus three Falcon Kicks and a Falcon Dive, and then a knee smash. The knee made contact with Luigi’s jaw, blood fountaining up on impact. Falcon began a combo of his own, with more aerial knees, shoulder charges, elbow strikes, kick attacks and rapid jabs followed by an uppercut. Then, he stomped downward, smashing Luigi back to the floor.

Douglas Jay Falcon was really going to see moves now.

Luigi swept his legs around and got up, immediately launching into jabs and kicks and then taking a chance with his up smash and an aerial Cyclone. He continued with his Screwdriver Kick, scores of forward smashes, kicks and chops, low heel kicks to trip him and finally overhand swipes to juggle him. He managed to get some powerful ones under the chin, to the jaw, on the collarbone and finally on the torso region. His yells increased as he unleashed his inner beast on the racer before him, the racer in question escaping every so often to pull off those flawless yet painful Falcon Punches. But he could throw a hundred punches—heck, he could punch till his knuckles cracked—it would never be enough to fell Luigi!

“Come on, Luigi! Let’s see more of those moves!” exhorted Douglas as he dashed forward with a Raptor Boost and missed.

“Fine—you asked for it,” panted Luigi, slamming serious punches into sides, belly and face and then switching to forward and down smashes, n-airs, f-airs and b-airs. He grabbed the racer by his scarf and slammed him onto the stage over and over again, setting up combos and then returning to chain-throws, using the occasional racecars as springboards. Grab and slam. Grab and slam. Combo. Space. Cyclone. Grab and slam. Repeat. All over the stage. The floor hummed slightly with the racer’s body hitting it constantly, but Luigi was on a roll, slipping in old, well-practiced combos and new ones he made up on a whim. Blood and sweat trailed down his face and body. He was in pain from those Falcon Punches, Falcon Kicks, knee smashes and everything else his opponent unloaded on him. But he wasn’t going to land another blow on him—not on this match! Just let him talk about Luigi being the bottom of the food chain after today!

 _He was flattered and touched to see Falcon sitting near the front that day, that cocky smile on his face which was infuriating one minute and encouraging the next. Of course, Samus was next to him, in her green tank top and green scarf. But having the F-Zero racer behind him, cheering for him and shouting for him to hang in there was a refreshing change of pace from the arrogant man he dealt with two years ago. He did as the Captain commanded and showed his moves to the big, bad turtle who somehow snatched the advantage from him and showed_ his _moves. He remembered the ripping pain and seeing his own blood on the Battlefield stage; he remembered falling through space on that last stock loss. But most of all, he remembered the awards ceremony and the words and Ganondorf eavesdropping, eventually joining in…_

What those two had to say was worse than Falcon’s words to him that night. The racer deserved his forgiveness; yet Koopa and Ganon did not. But engaged in a heated match with Falcon, he saw the opportunity to assuage his soul of that two-year-old itch. Time healed some wounds, but not all of them.

As Falcon found himself the victim of combo after combo and chain-throw after chain-throw, he knew Luigi was still thinking about that night and about the aftermath of his loss to Koopa. He was never a sore loser, but let’s just say Koopa was a sore _winner_ …

_“Doug, my man!” chortled Koopa as he strolled into the lounge one night and clapped Falcon on the shoulder._

_Falcon stonily shoved the hammy arm aside. “I don’t have anything to say to you,” he said as calmly as he could._

_Koopa had the gall to look offended. “Is this a way to treat a friend or a fellow Smasher?” he asked._

_“You may be a fellow Smasher, but you’re no friend of mine,” stated Falcon._

_“Wow, what crawled up your muscled butt?” sniggered Koopa._

_“Nothing,” shrugged Falcon. “I just don’t like you right now.”_

_“C’mon—I’m not that bad of a supervillain,” Koopa persisted._

_“Lusting after princesses? Badgering plumbers?”_

_“They let me participate in sports and kart races. Doug—we were friends once, remember?”_

_“Yeah? Well, that changed after I overheard you rip Luigi a new one.”_

_“Well, it’s true, isn’t it? I seem to recall you said it yourself—that he’s the bottom of the food chain, a n—b. So, you catch what I’m talking about.”_

_“I was blind, proud and stupid back then,” said Douglas, “but what you said to Luigi was mean. And unforgivable. And in front of the replay monitors, too!”_

_Koopa ordered a double Scotch on the rocks. “Tell me one time when you’ve seen that Green Bean do anything notable in Melee,” he said._

_“How about beating the Prince of Altea at Yoshi’s Island?” challenged Falcon as the aforementioned bluenette nodded in agreement. “How about trouncing Fox without items on Final Destination—five times so far? How about the Team Stamina Battle where he rushed to Mario’s defense? I’m telling you, it even had Pichu going crazy!”_

_“Yeah, he beat them, all right,” sniffed Koopa. “Too bad he didn’t beat me.”_

_“Now that’s just low,” muttered the racer as he ordered a club soda, knowing that he’d require something stronger to cope with Koopa’s smarminess. “Listen, I have to attend to my own business now. Good talk.”_

_He knew from his college writing courses about_ Kairos _, the right or opportune moment, which tended to work with matters of persuasion but could also be applied to a situation such as this one. That being said, Douglas made absolutely certain that Luigi was in the mood to hear about his exchange with Koopa that night. Luigi appeared to take it well, a little too well, and invited him to a rather aggressive spar before the day’s matches commenced._

_“Let me know when you’re about to have a rematch with him,” said Captain Falcon as they parted ways, “because I want to be there when you teach him a lesson.”_

Even as Luigi was owning him, Captain Falcon was gleefully awaiting the day when Koopa reaped what he’d sown that day. He was still fantasizing about it when the plumber hollered one last time and laid his finishing strike—an upwards angled Trowel Stab. Like the bird attributed to his surname, Douglas soared off the racetrack and into the blast line.

GAME!

“How’s _that_ for moves?!?” screamed Luigi, his body shaking like a car with its gears stripped. He dropped to his knees, feeling the raw emotions and the activity get to him. He struggled to pull himself from the brink of hyperactivity. It was the last thing he wanted, especially if he was past the halfway point of this adventure.

“Falcon giving you problems again?” asked Master Hand.

“Not really,” said Luigi. “It’s been two years, but I hear his words. It’s like Koopa said them.”

“There you go again with Koopa,” sighed Master Hand. “If he did something to you, Mario or Peach or said something, then why don’t you tell me?”

“I doubt you’ll be able to do anything about it,” Luigi said softly. “He persists in snatching the Princess—how likely is it that he’ll listen to you? MH—I’m a grown man. I can handle this. Trust me. I can.”

But Master Hand was still uncertain. With three stages remaining in Adventure Mode, would Luigi be able to hold it together?

**While in the merry month of May from me home I started,  
Left the girls of Tuam so sad and broken hearted,  
Saluted father dear, kissed me darling mother,  
Drank a pint of beer, me grief and tears to smother,  
Then off to reap the corn, leave where I was born,  
Cut a stout black thorn to banish ghosts and goblins;  
Bought a pair of brogues rattling o'er the bogs  
And fright'ning all the dogs on the rocky road to Dublin.**

**One, two, three four, five,  
Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road  
all the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah !**

**In Mullingar that night I rested limbs so weary,  
Started by daylight next morning blithe and early,  
Took a drop of pure to keep me heartfrom sinking;  
Thats a Paddy's cure whenever he's on drinking.  
See the lassies smile, laughing all the while  
At me curious style, 'twould set your heart a bubblin'  
Asked me was I hired, wages I required,  
I was almost tired of the rocky road to Dublin.**

**One, two, three four, five,  
Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road  
all the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah !**

**In Dublin next arrived, I thought it such a pity  
To be soon deprived a view of that fine city.  
So then I took a stroll, all among the quality;  
Me bundle it was stole, all in a neat locality.  
Something crossed me mind, when I looked behind,  
No bundle could I find upon me stick a wobblin'  
Enquiring for the rogue, they said me Connaught brogue  
Wasn't much in vogue on the rocky road to Dublin.**

**One, two, three four, five,  
Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road  
all the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah !**

**From there I got away, me spirits never falling,  
Landed on the quay, just as the ship was sailing.  
The Captain at me roared, said that no room had he;  
When I jumped aboard, a cabin found for Paddy.  
Down among the pigs, played some hearty rigs,  
Danced some hearty jigs, the water round me bubbling;  
When off Holyhead I wished meself was dead,  
Or better for instead on the rocky road to Dublin.**

**One, two, three four, five,  
Hunt the Hare and turn her down the rocky road  
all the way to Dublin, Whack follol de rah !**

**Well the boys of Liverpool, when we safely landed,  
Called meself a fool, I could no longer stand it.  
Blood began to boil, temper I was losing;  
Poor old Erin's Isle they began abusing.  
"Hurrah me soul" says I, me Shillelagh I let fly.  
Some Galway boys were nigh and saw I was a hobble in,  
With a load "hurray !" joined in the affray.  
We quitely cleared the way for the rocky road to Dublin.**

**One, two, three four, five,  
Hunt the Hare and turn her down  
the rocky road and all the way to Dublin,  
Whack follol de rah !**

 

 


	18. 9: Onett

Onett, in Eagleland County, was the birthplace of Ness, the PSI powerhouse and the final member of the Formidable Four. Ness’s life was upended with the crash of a meteorite into his backyard. He, Jeff, Paula and Poo did battle with Gigyas to save the world, and the psychic child had been perfecting his PSI skills ever since. In the Smash tournaments, he fought with a Home Run Bat and a yo-yo as well as his psychic abilities. In Melee, PK Flash replaced PK Fire as his neutral special, the latter being moved to a side special, and he still had PK Thunder and PSI Magnet. Historically, Ness didn’t really care how he was ranked. He just wished that those at the top would take their thumbs out of their butts.

Ness was proud to be one of the Formidable Four. It gave him a feeling of—distinction. And they always found ways to set themselves apart from the other eight originals. If the Great Eight took the bus, then the Formidable Four took bikes. If the Great Eight drove, then the Formidable Four walked or jogged. And if the Great Eight walked, then the Formidable Four Rollerbladed. Heck, they even had their own fight song!

**We are a band of four**

**Willing our wings to soar**

**We’re not some ragtag group, just wait and see.**

**With one big voice we’ll sing**

**And let the Smash Realm ring**

**Ring with our strength and with our majesty!**

**We will burn, burn through the winter, the spring and the summer!**

**We will burn—the puffball, the racer, the child and the plumber!**

**We’ll keep our spirits bright**

**All through the haunting night**

’ **Cause rain or shine, all of us four will fight!**

And on this fine day in Onett, not one, but _three_ Nesses stood, waiting for Luigi. The plumber had made a remarkable first impression on the psychic child. He was shy at first, but Ness soon discovered his spirited, eager and outgoing side, the side which had been the embodiment of the Formidable Four. In his eyes, being a hidden character wasn’t a bad thing, but a distinguishing quality, and that was why he suggested that they distinguish themselves from the other eight. Reuniting after two years only served to fuel that spirit, along with his buffs and differentiation from Mario. Ness looked forward to his battles against the man in green and never complained when he lost. Losing it was worth it to see what he could do! When Master Hand told him of today’s event, that he along with two clones of him would face off against the plumber, Ness was so giddy that he hardly slept a wink last night. He was going to make Luigi’s run through Adventure Mode the best one yet!

_“L?” asked Ness as he caught up with Luigi. “Are you okay?”_

_“Yeah,” Luigi replied in a quiet voice. “I just need to…”_

_“I know,” said Ness. “Take as much time as you need. Just know that you have me to talk to.”_

_Luigi smiled. “Yeah. We’re still the Formidable Four, aren’t we?”_

_“You bet!” giggled Ness. “We’re not afraid of that turtle! I’m gonna go talk to Jiggs and the Cap’n about this!”_

_“Thank you, Ness,” said Luigi, “but I think I can handle that turtle.”_

_Ness was true to his word. Over the next few days, he made sure Koopa knew that he was unhappy with his actions and showed him no mercy with his trusty Home Run Bat. He’d also had a long conversation with Jiggs and Falcon about it, and they joined in giving the turtle his just desserts in their own matches against him. But as they observed Luigi taking on opponent after opponent, they knew that Koopa’s true just desserts would come from him!_

Onett was a busy town, with vehicles aplenty cruising by. The three Nesses stood next to a drugstore, which sat between a couple of houses. Fighters could stand on the roofs of these houses, on the tree boughs nearby, or on the rope of colored flags above one house. But the awnings of the drugstore were weaker than they looked and couldn’t withstand the Smashers’ weight for long. And the street traffic certainly didn’t do any good. It was never okay to play in the street, even if you were fighting in a tournament!

Currently playing on low over the loudspeakers was a short medley of Earthbound hits. First up was a few stanzas of “Bein’ Friends”. Then, things slowed down for a rendition of the Eight Melodies, finished off with the “Enemy Approaching” chime, and then repeated. The music would turn up once the battle began. Not quite Smash-worthy, but at least it matched the mood of the town.

“How are you three boys doing?” boomed Master Hand.

“Okay,” said Ness.

“Okay,” said the second Ness.

“Okay,” said the third Ness.

“You have an interesting fight ahead of you,” MH warned. “Luigi—something’s coming over him. Every minute you spend in battle will only increase his determination and give him new strategies on how to defeat you. Just figure him out and try to have fun, okay?”

“Okay,” the Nesses said in unison.

“Okay,” piped up another voice.

The Nesses looked up. Standing on the awning of the drugstore was Luigi, smiling down at them.

“L, get down from there before that thing collapses!” gasped Ness.

“Relax. I know this place by heart. I visited it enough times.” Luigi jumped down from the awning and onto the soft grass, eyeing the three boys.

“Bet you didn’t expect three of me,” said Ness.

“With Master Hand, I learned to expect anything,” said Luigi.

The first Ness positioned himself in front of Luigi, raising his fists. The second Ness stood behind to the right, and the third stood behind to the left. Together, they’d formed a triangle around the green-clad plumber. They could force him to fight in the street and be at the mercy of unpredictable traffic, each car dealing 30 points of damage. If he jumped up onto the awnings, the Nesses could destroy them, knocking him back down. He’d try to stay on the tree boughs or the house roofs, but with a little patience, they could make him play the game by their rules.

READY—GO!

Immediately, the music cranked up. Luigi tensed, blue eyes scanning each Ness, reading them, figuring them out. With the right tools and the proper application of stage knowledge, he could beat them to the punch. Behind him, he felt the two Nesses closing in, Home Run Bats at the ready. Those bats didn’t play when it came to Melee! The first Ness also had his bat raised, his face set like a Little League player. But Luigi had his face set, too, the muscles on the side of his neck working as he thought about what he needed to do.

The Nesses closed in on him until they could hear his breaths and see the topography of rolling veins and muscles on his neck. Each one mapped out the trajectory of his swing so that the overall knockback angle would be towards the street. They would strike one after the other to make Luigi fly into one Ness and then the other and then the other and finally into the path of an oncoming car. A direct hit at the junction where shoulder met neck would work. Hips, backside or ribcage would be good targets, too. And shoulder blades—especially shoulder blades, flexing and standing out sharply as Luigi held his stance, searching the faces of his three foes, continuing to breathe steadily, cool and calm. There was a glowing ball of energy deep inside his chest and moving down to his belly. There was lightning forking down his limbs. And in the background, there were the two voices, faint yet venomous. The reason why he was standing here today.

He stared solemnly at Ness. “Okay.”

Ness nodded. “Okay.”

And the other two Nesses said, “Okay.”

Before they could batter up, multiple punches collided with them as Luigi sucked them all into his Cyclone move. He then noticed the Mr. Saturns falling from the sky and wandering around, snatched one up and threw it at the first Ness he saw. One Ness knocked him off his feet with a walk the dog yo-yo, but Luigi prevented a follow-up with a kick attack. He leaped clear of a bat swing and lit into Ness with body blows before delivering a Trowel Stab directly to the center of his chest.

A second Ness distracted him then with PK Fire. Luigi spun around and engaged him with karate chops as this Ness continued sending out more PSI attacks, punches and kicks. He then grabbed Ness and started a chain-throw and chain-grab combo, still delicately piecing combinations of his best attacks together to yield the best results. Ness would always mess him up with PK Flash (also known as PK Pulse) before going on the offensive with his trusty Home Run Bat and the occasional Mr. Saturn. The third Ness joined the party with his yo-yo, executing an around the world trick which blackened one of Luigi’s eyes. Luigi punished him with a misfire, which knocked the third Ness into the recovering first Ness. The second Ness brought his bat up to his shoulder and then sent a cold, precise swing straight into Luigi’s nose.

Luigi went limp from the pain. That was when the first and third Nesses got out their bats and practically jumped on him, whacking him on the first places they saw. During this beating, the second Ness used PK Thunder on himself, making him into a human missile with its target locked on Luigi. Unfortunately, Luigi saw this, hit the two Nesses attacking him in their kneecaps with his forward smash and then kicked them into the path of their teammate. They went flying and then crashed onto the paved street. A car raced toward them, but the trio cartwheeled out of the way. Luigi also hopped out of the street and onto a tree bough.

“PK Thunder!”

At once, the three Nesses looped their thunder attack at Luigi, sending him tumbling out of the tree like a wounded bird. One of the Nesses rushed over to meet him and threw a roundhouse kick. The other two chose to pummel him with their aerial attacks, trying to force him into a Wall of Pain with their f-airs. Finally, they let him drop to the floor, where they pelted him with a litany of yo-yo attacks and resumed using him as a piñata.

Luigi swiftly knocked the three boys down with his breakdance attack. He picked one Ness at random, locked onto him with fireballs and then chained his overhand punch into itself before poking his hand into the psychic, knocking him right into an oncoming car. Ness toppled into the blast line with a childish “Ouch!”

With one Ness down, Luigi focused back on the other two. Keeping them separated with fireballs, he began to fiercely light into them, spurred by the blood gushing from his nose and the bat strikes all over his body. He took risks and played in the street, hoping to draw his opponents into the traffic, cartwheeling clear of the cars whizzing down the road. The walls of a few buildings served as templates for infinite combos, but the Nesses had high, psychokinetic jumps and easily DI’d away. No matter, Luigi still had his throws. Over and over, the two kids tried to do a team combo on him, but he’d break free with a Cyclone or grab and throw one Ness away from him. In addition to his strategies with singles, he’d developed strategies for surviving the heat of multi-man frays. Such strategies involved fireballs, heavy baiting, sneak attacks and convincing the other opponents that he was hiding, cowering, shying away. They’d laugh at him, call him nasty names and start toward him, an easy KO in their minds. Then—when they were right in his sights—he’d let them have it.

The Nesses weren’t like those opponents, thank God. They just fought aggressively. Their yo-yos and bats weren’t just toys to them. Sometimes, Luigi would hide in plain sight, and when a Ness came looking for him, he’d walk right into a trap. Or, he’d wait for them on the awning of the drugstore, where they traded smash attacks until the awning began to weaken. As the drug store sign began to grow crooked and fall, Luigi would trick the Nesses into putting up a shield, and then throw Mr. Saturns at them, stunning them, as the awning collapsed. With his two foes on the floor, Luigi would jump down and start a combo with one or the other.

Again, Luigi had a Ness isolated and was going so hard at him that he was shocked at himself. This Ness fought pretty hard with the Home Run Bat, landing scores of blows on his torso, sides, face, collarbone and nose. They were balancing themselves on the roof of a house as they fought. Ness relentlessly seared Luigi with PSI energy while continuing to take rattling blows from the plumber. The boy’s mouth was open as he took great gulping breaths; still, Luigi, breathing just as heavily, pushed him further and further. After Ness sent a sneakered foot into his opponent’s mouth, Luigi quickly retaliated with a roundhouse kick, grabbed him and threw him into another car, knocking him out.

Luigi and the final Ness stood there, smiling at each other. The psychic invited the plumber to land the first strike, but Luigi saw through the charade. Ness dashed forward and attacked with his yo-yo, but Luigi dodged out of the way and performed a leg sweep, launching into an aerial combo soon after. By then, Ness was so heavily damaged that any move could reel him into the sky. But he managed to drop a PK Thunder and a PK Flash on him from above. Luigi jabbed and got in some heavier blows on the jaw before catching Ness on the neck with a forward smash. As the boy wheezed, Luigi darted in close and—

**PIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!**

Ness screamed as the Super Jump Punch propelled him out of his hometown of Onett.

GAME!

“This was another single-level stage,” MH told him. “This next stage will also be single-level. And you might want to bring a jacket.”

“I’ll take my chances, thank you,” said Luigi as he rested from the battle.

 


	19. 10: Icicle Mountain

Luigi was right. He didn’t need a jacket when he had Fire Flowers at his disposal. During the interval, he’d swapped outfits, and now he was wearing a white shirt and hat with dark green overalls and black boots. Now, everyone could see the full golden tan on his skin. Standing on the chill Icicle Mountain, Luigi felt the warmth and fire circulating inside him. He closed his eyes and let it build until it was massaging his body. Snowflakes lazily floated down from the sky and onto his eyelids, eyelashes, nose and cheeks. He tipped his head back so that some would land on his neck. The two forces of ice and fire worked with each other to prevent Luigi from getting too hot or too cold.

“The game was great,” said Luigi, his breaths visible in the subzero temperature. “I’ll admit that. But why make it a battle stage? The constant upward scrolling, as well as the variable pace of such scrolling, is a pain in the…”

“I know, I know,” said MH. “The good news for you is that you’ll only have to survive 51 seconds of this. After 51 seconds, the speed will be constant, and a battle will be waiting for you.”

“Okay,” said Luigi.

“And by the way, watch out for the Topis and the Polar Bears,” said MH.

“You don’t have to remind me,” Luigi told him.

READY—GO!

The stage immediately started scrolling upwards, slowly at first. There were platforms scattered all over the mountain which Luigi could hop up and over. Sometimes, he could hop up two platforms at a time, since his jump was so high. He was barely stationary for even a second, feeling the scrolling speed starting to increase. And as MH warned, this mountain was infested with Polar Bears and Topis. Wishing to conserve his energy, Luigi fought defensively, not attacking unless they approached him, or threw fireballs. Topis pushed a lot of Freezies around, which Luigi would grab and throw back at them or at a Polar Bear. One attack the Polar Bears used was to jump up and down, jolting the stage up slightly. Luigi usually knocked them away with a good kick, or picked them up and threw them. The scrolling speed had become fairly fast now. No sense wasting time on these relatively harmless enemies. The faster the stage scrolled, the higher Luigi willed himself to jump, and he’d barely landed on a platform before he jumped again. The momentum of the previous jump powered his next jump, along with the balls of his feet. He seemed to spring lightly from his toes. The icy wind cut a swath through his face and clothes, but with his Fire Flower outfit, he didn’t mind. He breathed in the cool air, crisper than a York Peppermint Patty and as refreshing as Arrowhead Mountain Spring Water. Now, the stage was at maximum scrolling speed. It was as if Luigi was trying to outrun some high-speed elevator. He refused to even dwell on it, just focusing on jumping and jumping and jumping like a jumping bean. A green jumping bean. A jumping green bean. A jumping green string bean. Ha-ha-ha. He cracked himself up—

…right up until he remembered the various times that stupid turtle called him by the name and how he’d caused the name to spread, eventually becoming adopted by Ganondorf and the other high-and-mighty ones who thought of Luigi as some lowly peasant. He looked down and noticed that his hands had balled up, green flames suffusing them. A few paces away from him stood a Polar Bear. That Polar Bear was the unfortunate target for Luigi’s spiking temper as he grabbed it, swung it round twice and hurled it off the mountain.

And into one of two pairs of mountaineers he knew all too well.

The remaining pair of Ice Climbers gawked at Luigi. They consisted of a boy and a girl. The boy wore a blue parka, and the girl wore pink, and they were a team and they loved each other dearly, like most siblings. Their names were Nana and Popo.

“Oh!” said Luigi. “I didn’t see you guys!”

“Is everyone figuring that out?” asked Popo.

“Figure what out?” asked Luigi.

“That the Polar Bear is a OHKO?” asked Nana.

“I just needed to let off some aggression,” explained Luigi.

“We noticed,” said both Ice Climbers.

“We hope you feel better,” chirped Nana.

Luigi smiled and blushed at her concern. “I’ll be okay,” he assured her. “Now, who wants to fight on this mountain?”

Nana and Popo answered that question by springing forward, mallets at the ready. But Luigi had fought them before and had seen others fight them. He could separate the duo to decrease the power of their special attacks. And if he KO’d Popo, then it would count as a stock loss for the Ice Climbers or as a win if it was a one-stock match. But the Ice Climbers weren’t to be underestimated just because of their parkas, chubby faces, bean-shaped eyes or their brown hair. They were known to the serious tournament players as “the Wobbles”. They put those mallets of theirs to very good use, if you know what I mean. They gave vanquished opponents nightmares. Those who dared mock them for being little kids paid a hefty fine. And right now, they were in good company with a man who’d been sneered at for most of his life.

_“Let’s go, L!” the Ice Climbers chanted, clanging their mallets together at the end of the chant. “Let’s go, L! Let’s go! Let’s go!”_

_The young mountaineers sat there, occasionally sipping from their ICEE beverages, joining the rest of the spectators in watching the drama unfolding on the Battlefield. This simple stage was just right for the two fighters. Both were so determined to beat the other up so badly that hazards would only put them in a raw mood. The ambient background and more ambient music were all they needed for this match. Though the Ice Climbers wished that the fight was on Icicle Mountain. That way, the plumber could simply fling the turtle into the abyss and use the upwards scrolling to drain all of his five stocks in seconds! But they could settle for the sight they were seeing now._

_The Ice Climber were on the side of the underdog. Wasn’t everyone? Well, except for a certain Gerudo King. Nana and Popo had been on the receiving end of Koopa’s b.s. many, many times, and that was after they’d heard tales of it. What was he trying to do—make himself look like a god? Even after the duo went Wobble on him, he still enjoyed treating them and everyone else like little kids. They were sick of it. Sick of it! And so a few moments into it, the mini mountaineers had initiated a cheer._

_“Lu-i-gi!” they yelled before pounding their mallets together. “Lu-i-gi!”_

_It wasn’t long before they got their seatmates in on it, and it grew into a little game. First, Nana and Popo chanted Luigi’s name. Then, the person sitting on both sides of them chanted the name twice. The people next to them chanted three times, and so on, and for the finish, the entire row shouted Luigi’s name as loud as they could. The cheer spread to the rows above and below them. It became like “the Wave”, except they used their voices, rather than their arms!_

_Luigi hadn’t stopped fighting for even a moment, always finding a way to redefine the words “Hell”, “agony” and “nightmare” for his opponent. Using the main and the upper platforms to attack, defend and escape when things got too much. Coupling his strengths with Koopa’s weaknesses and making his opponent suffer for such weaknesses. Punishing techs, reading, baiting. The Ice Climbers heard the sharp sounds of Luigi’s blows against turtle hide, and by the way Koopa was clutching his stomach occasionally, they could guess that Luigi attacked that area the most! The center of the belly had an invisible bull’s-eye painted on it for the Green Missile. Many Smash attacks bludgeoned Koopa’s fearsome face. Luigi was both fire and ice that day. The fire was in his eyes, in his attacks and in his voice as it shot up the stands like stock market prices on a good day. The ice was in his face and in his disposition, convincing many that something had occurred between them before the match. Or, this was sixteen years of animosity speaking._

_The ice was present, too, after Luigi lost, when Nana and Popo witnessed Koopa accosting him and dragging him to the replay area so he could watch the defeat over and over. And when that didn’t break the plumber, Koopa went on an all-out tirade, telling him how worthless and pathetic and useless he was and that he wasn’t fit for Smash. What had been a fiery glare during the match was now an icy one, the ice potent enough to petrify anyone. The ice had spread from his eyes to his face, which only grew icier with each cruel word that leaped out of Koopa’s mouth. Popo felt Nana tugging on his sleeve and agreed with her that they shouldn’t stick around to listen to anymore. But as they made their exit, they caught sight of Ganon as he joined in the fun…_

Icicle Mountain soon rang with battle cries and the slam of mallets and bodies. Nana and Popo could stop Luigi in his tracks using Blizzard or fire chunks of ice at him using Ice Shot. Squall Hammer had properties similar to the Luigi Cyclone, but the hits were harder. Sometimes, one Climber could hold Luigi while the other attacked him. Or, they volleyed him from one to the other with their mallets. But Luigi knew there were advantages to being between them. His fireballs could stave off one as he racked damage points on the other. They couldn’t use Belay. And his main focus was on Popo, since defeating him would signal an automatic win over the Ice Climbers. He used his fast aerials to keep them spaced, reserved his smash attacks for Popo and stuck with strong attacks on Nana unless it was an emergency. Individually, they were relatively lightweight, so a few misfires could send them quite far. Due to the scrolling, it was hard to string long combos, so Luigi tried to send the Climbers downward with his blows for more guaranteed KO’s. He could always rely on old tricks, yet he kept an open mind when it came to the various stages, especially when it came to auto-scrolling ones.

And what could be better than taking on the Ice Climbers to this catchy music? It had a swinging, jazzy, rock-n-roll vibe to it! It made people want to forget about their troubles and get up and dance—well, at least the first half. The second part was more of a slow dance and had a bit of a wintry wonderland feel. Luigi couldn’t believe that this was a song that played as people beat each other up on a mountain. It was better suited for a jukebox at the hop!

Music and stages aside, Luigi owned the Ice Climbers from start to finish, which was good because he only had 3 minutes and 9 seconds to defeat them. There were 90 seconds remaining on the clock when Luigi bent his elbow and aimed his Trowel Stab at Popo, angling it downwards so that he plummeted into the blast zone below.

GAME!

Nana smiled at him. “That was a good fight,” she smiled. “Come back soon—maybe we’ll have some cocoa waiting!” And with that, she exited to be with her brother.

“How was it?” asked MH.

“Chill,” replied Luigi.

“Hm. Good to know,” said MH. “Well, from now on, the stages you’ll fight on are going to be simple. That’s the good news.”

“And the bad news?”

Master Hand winked. “Things are about to get serious.”

 


	20. 11-1: Fighting Wireframes

The simple stage. The cosmic colors. The smaller platforms. The memory of that battle slammed full force into Luigi like a Semi. Like a violently popped balloon, air began to rapidly expel from him. He felt as if something was compressing his stomach. His body seemed to reel in space, and he leaned on a platform for a sense of equilibrium. Then, his mouth opened, lungs expanding so that much-needed oxygen could float into them. His palms started to sweat, the back of his throat ached and feverishness exploded all over his face. He bit his lip so hard that his teeth split the skin. His bulbous nose became runny, wetness prickling at his eyes. Breaths came faster and faster and faster, and his vision began to warp, shapes materializing before his eyes as if he was being transported in time.

_And he was standing there, watching himself being pounded sadistically by Koopa, watching himself having the advantage one moment and the next, being intercepted by those claws and sliced all over. Beefy, clawed hands and feet smashed into his face, his torso, his chest—smashed into him all over the place. He was gripped by those claws in a crushing hold and savagely slammed against the concrete stage again and again until his vision went fuzzy for a few seconds. The relentless shell spines shredded into his skin as Koopa did his Whirling Fortress and other shell-based attacks; the searing heat from that Fire Breath only made it worse. And the terrifying, sheer drop from the stage into the blast zone—five times—made his stomach drop to the floor. As he found his stock plummeting, he fought harder and harder, trying new strategies, holding on, refusing to give up. For his brother. For the Princess. For his fans. All in vain. Koopa would throw him like a piece of garbage into the blast zone after he got tired of slashing, slicing, flaying, goring, smashing and slamming his green-clad opponent, roaring in glee at the crowd’s horrified interjections. There was blood literally bathing the stage and dripping off the other platforms. Luigi would never forget the smell. Defeat was inevitable for him now, but he kept fighting and fighting, defying the pain and blood loss, until he could fight no more._

The scene shifted again _and now he was in the reception hall, looking calm as he applauded Koopa, a little raw, but who could blame him? There was Koopa, hefting the victory spoils in his hand and showing off his bulk, giving an impromptu, gloating speech to the crowd who tried their freaking best not to be salty. But wasn’t Koopa the mother lode of salt? Master Hand had to step in and correct Koopa, saying that it was a good fight and that Luigi had battled well, too. Unfortunately, Koopa didn’t listen and continued to snigger. Luigi blocked it out, listened to his body and mentally calculated how many more Shroom Shakes it would take to completely heal him. He’d sucked one down prior to the awards ceremony, a chocolate one made specially for him, and he’d found it delectable. The new Smash Lounge had a Shroom Shake Bar, with happy hour starting at 5p.m. and ending at closing time during which the Shroom Shakes were on the house. Perhaps Luigi would take advantage of Shroom Shake Happy Hour tonight._

And the scene shifted once more _and he was standing in the replay room, claws digging into his scalp and forcing him to watch his own defeat. And then malevolent eyes burned a hole into his face as sneering lips said those words. And then another voice joining Koopa’s voice, a voice he knew all too well, as the Gerudo materialized in the room, flinging barb after barb at the plumber. And then his heart pumped, harder, louder, faster; his vision tunneled into the replay and the turtle and the Gerudo. And then he wanted to scream at them, he wanted to let loose with every filthy word in both the English and Italian languages, he wanted to burn their skin and muscles from their bones with green fire, he wanted to violently beat them with his gloved fists over and over and over until their faces were broken, bloody messes, until their ribcages were decimated and until teeth and bone fragments were scattered all over the floor, he wanted to know WHY IN GOD’S NAME THOSE TWO WERE INVITED HERE AND WHAT SICK DRUG MASTER HAND HAD BEEN ON TO EVEN_ CONSIDER _THE IDEA OF ACCEPTING THEIR APPLICATIONS, AND WHY THESE TWO WERE SO DRIVEN TO CAUSE THE SUFFERING OF OTHER SMASHERS BECAUSE THEY MADE HIM AND MARIO AND PEACH AND ZELDA AND LINK SUFFER ENOUGH IN THEIR OWN UNIVERSES, AND WHO DID THEY THINK THEY WERE AND WHY WASN’T ANYONE DOING ANYTHING ABOUT THEM AND WHY WERE THEY SAYING THESE THINGS TO HIM WHY WERE THEY DOING THIS TO HIM WHY WON’T THEY JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE OH GOD SOMEONE MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP MAKE THEM STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_

“Luigi?!”

_Oh, Dio, thank you. Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!_

Blue eyes, blue, tear-filled eyes, stared gratefully up at Master Hand as he hovered, concerned, over the man in green. His body was back to normal. He could breathe again. He could feel the ground under his boots, and he eased himself off the platform, sweat soaking him. It was like the moment a fever broke. Crystal clarity returned to him, and he realized that he’d interjected aloud, that he’d been crying and that he’d been beating the platform with his fists. He did a breathing exercise, calming down, cooling off, focusing back on the task at hand and locking the anger in a place where it would never touch him again.

“I’m sorry,” he said finally.

“You don’t have to ap…”

“No. I do. That was—improper—of a Smasher,” Luigi said, his voice jerky from his release.

“Why won’t you tell me what happened?” asked MH. “Maybe I can help you.”

“They won’t listen.”

“I can make them listen,” MH retorted. “Now, for the last time, what happened with Koopa and Ganondorf?”

Luigi drew in a deep breath. “The day I fought Koopa…”

“I know that you lost to him. Is that what this fixation on him is about?”

“No. After I lost, and I was on my way to clear my head, Koopa—he grabbed me and dragged me to the replay area. And he—he made me watch it again and again and—he hurt me!” His voice jumped up to a shriek.

“Calm down. What else?”

“He got in my face and he said—things. He called me—names! He said I was useless and shouldn’t be considered a hero and a Smasher. I couldn’t take it. And then Ganondorf showed up and laughed at me. They were both insulting me left and right and—I couldn’t take it!” Tears popped out of his eyes as he finally confessed everything to Master Hand—the words, the insults, the rage and the brief obsession with improving himself.

“So that’s why you—you…”

Luigi nodded. “Koopa underestimated me. Ganon underestimated me. They are absolutely DEAD WRONG about me. And I’m gonna prove it. They’re gonna wish for a time machine to stop themselves from talking that trash by the time I’m through with them.”

“I assure you, your chance will come,” said MH, “but I need you to focus right now.”

“Absolutely.”

“Besides, the 15 Wireframes coming for you will take advantage of your emotional distress. Speaking of which, here they come now.”

15 pink figures with the Smash symbol on their faces materialized. 8 women, 7 men. The female Wireframes were lean, graceful and flexible. The male Wireframes were bulky, tough and aggressive. They were cold and had no eyes, no nose and no mouth. Just that round circle with the lines through it—a faceless, emotionless mask. They didn’t speak either—they only communicated through their actions. Some Wireframes worked with the Smashers in the Training Room. They staffed the lounges and the Shroom Shake Bar, coordinated awards ceremonies and other special events and manned the Smash Spa. But most of them were created exclusively for Adventure Mode—and Multi-Man Melee.

“You have fun with this one,” MH said to the Wireframes as he departed.

The Wireframes nodded to the glove before turning back to Luigi and encircling him. They could smell his adrenaline. Along with something else. Blood. It painted his mouth from biting his lips during his flashbacks, and it circulated through his system as it pumped from his heart. Slowly, Luigi licked the blood from his lips and let his eyes flit from Wireframe to Wireframe. The rage had left his face. The ocean inside his eyes had stilled. His mind and body were prepared. He opened up his chest and diaphragm slightly so he could breathe easier. The breaths came out in gentle whispers and whistles while the 15 Wireframes edged closer. He was so calm and so cool. Standing there in the center of the Battlefield where he’d been beaten and humiliated weeks ago, he raised his fists, the same determination present that day coloring him once more. Only this time, he wasn’t going to make mistakes or be intercepted. This time, he was going to win.

Luigi’s pulse ping-ponged against the skin of his neck as the male and female bodies arranged themselves into a pattern around him. Could they feel the same surge of adrenaline as he? Could they feel the battle lust consuming him? Their faces were literally blank slates save for that emblem, but did they emote another way? A small part of him wondered if they were even clothed or if they had any—anatomy.

The male Wireframes appeared bald, but the female Wireframes had long “hair” pulled into a ponytail, running down their shoulder blades. They smelled like Zelda. The stocky males smelled like Captain Falcon. They all assumed their fighting positions as well, only the rise and fall of their chests indicating their breathing. Icicle-blue eyes ghosted across the wiry pink curtain before him, picking and choosing a Wireframe to take down first.

READY—GO!

Luigi’s body was braced for all 15 to pounce on him, but that didn’t happen. Perhaps they’d watched him in battle and decided to take a few pages from his playbook. He noticed that the males tended to attack first, while the females went for mindgames. The first few males charged toward him, but Luigi threw a quick barrage of fireballs, sent a haymaker into the chest of one and then perfectly pivoted in time to nail another with a forward smash. A third aimed an axe kick at him, but Luigi spun aside, hooked him twice and then punched his torso repeatedly before kicking him in the edge of the body. The Wireframes had a rough and soft texture, like different types of cloth, but their fists hurt as hard as any Smasher’s. Luigi learned the hard way when the males closed in on him, striking face, chest, stomach, hips and even the neck. He bobbed and weaved under the sea of fists, popping up and attacking when they least expected it. Suddenly, he splayed them all over the stage with a Cyclone. That was when the females rushed in.

They were clever and crafty ones, reading his movements as easily as he read theirs. Plumber and female Wireframes were evenly matched, the former pushing a little harder to get even a small advantage. He tried to aim his blows at the center of the body, taking note of the way they bent in two or withered like plants. Smoothly, he danced about the Battlefield, in time with the purple-pink forms working against him, battering and pounding away. Then, the males rejoined the females, and all Luigi could see was bulk and curves. He answered their challenge with a powerful shout as he continued to make punching bags out of them.

He remembered MH’s words. He needed to stay focused. It was easy to do so, since the Wireframes attacked harsher than the Polygons of days past. The ladies sometimes did teams on him while the guys coldly stood by as one male did the pounding. Wireframes ambushed him on the higher platforms when he tried to escape. As Luigi’s attacks increased in power, Wireframes began flying off the stage. Some of them were hurled off. Males or females were lured away from their company with fireballs and then practically decimated. They tried to unnerve him by boxing him in; they’d listen to his breathing and study the sweat rolling down his chin and underneath his top as he glared at them. He had a good, strong, firm neck, the Adam’s apple bouncing lightly, the tendons standing out whenever his skin went taut. He felt the sweat covering him like a blanket as he dodged melee attacks and let his fists fly. His arms were like rapiers every time he threw a Trowel Stab. He’d hit the floor every so often for a down smash or a down tilt. Due to the crowded environment, he couldn’t cut loose with those combos, but he could short hop and throw out some aerials to push his attackers away.

Most of the males had been knocked out. Maybe because the females were more cautious. They didn’t leap on him like enraged wildebeests when the going got tough. They’d slip in and give him a pounding while he was distracted. It was only polite for Luigi to return the favor. He dodged, leaped, backflipped and wavedashed, hacking at the literally wired bodies. He rocketed himself from one end of the stage to the other, sending both males and females flying. They made no noise, even as hailstorms of blows bruised their flank. Even as they fell into oblivion. The only sound present was Luigi, shouting dares at the Wireframes, provoking them to get in his face so he could make them regret it. Sharp kicks cracked jaws. Smash attacks encountered faces and abdominal areas. 15 fighters shrunk to 10, to 5, to 3 and finally to 1.

And this Wireframe, this lone wireframe, hung back for a moment to study Luigi, cocking her head slightly and brushing the “hair” from her faceless face. Luigi smiled disarmingly at her and allowed her to come close and feel his energy. Her body was like a willow as she fluidly moved toward him, and then firmed up her stance as she raised her fists once more.

Luigi took this as his cue to throw a fireball. The Wireframe dodged, but Luigi intercepted with a kick, knocking her sprawling. She got up, but Luigi had already gotten into position to grab her and start a combo. Whenever she air-dodged, he’d just re-grab her. He chain threw her against the upper platforms and let go with his swift chops. Then, he executed his Screwdriver Kick, sometimes on the stage to bring the combo to the ground and other times off the stage to attempt the meteor smash. But she could vault herself to safety and retaliate with swift kicks and punches. This Wireframe wasn’t quite like the rest.

Even so, Luigi managed to defeat her. Rather than use a Super Jump Punch or a d-air spike, Luigi chose to grab her, swing her three times and then let go, the power of the throw enough to launch her beyond the blast line.

SUCCESS!

“Nice to see that you’ve calmed down some,” MH said brightly.

“I know,” said Luigi. “Seeing this stage just brought back a lot of memories.”

“Can you hang in there a little while longer?”

Two glinting, metallic figures dropped from the sky onto the top platform of the Battlefield. Slowly and robotically, they unstuck themselves from the platform and stood up, facing each other.

Ominously, they hopped down onto the main platform on either side of Luigi. That was when the plumber recognized one of the metallic figures.

Metal Mario.

Which meant that the other guy was—Metal Luigi.

The Metal Bros were ready for action!

 


	21. 11-2: Metal Bros

Metal Mario hadn’t changed a bit since his and Luigi’s first encounter on Meta Crystal. He was still the faceless, soulless fighting machine whose gleaming frame sported Luigi’s reflection. The plumber could still remember MM’s footsteps on the stage as they battled. _Twow, twow, twow, twow_. Steady, mechanical, relentless, each _twow_ in time with Luigi’s heartbeat. The leaden steps would echo in Luigi’s head every so often, and instead of scaring him, it made him smile. He’d held his own against a metallic brute whose only purpose was to challenge flesh-and-blood mortals. He’d used gravity as an advantage, tricking MM into trying to recover from a fall off Meta Crystal. Though MM’s blows felt like 8t weights, the man in green had triumphed.

Time to see how well he did against two metallic foes.

Metal Mario was in front of him, and if he had a face, then it would’ve lit up in recognition. This time around, he looked more like the real Mario, facial outlines, moustache, and all. But his eyes were still empty and hollow. All he knew was fighting and intimidating. His feet clanged on the floor as he ambled toward the green-clad plumber, and his own defiant, determined face stared back at him through the alloy. He let out a breath, watching it fog against MM, and then inhaled the scent of cold steel. Deep in his mind, he could hear the music playing over the Meta Crystal battle, the combination of drums and synth sending both combatants into beast mode. His tongue slid across his lips as he prepared for one last dance with Metal Mario.

Soft clanking sounded behind him, and he knew it was Metal Luigi. Dare he take his eyes off of Metal Mario and see what his own metallic doppelganger looked like? Tall and lanky, this Metal Luigi, with the same awkwardness and sheepishness which had grown to be two of his personality traits. Like MM, ML was devoid of expression, but Luigi could see his own image better. Metal Luigi raised his fists, ready to do battle, and Luigi swore he caught his own scent with the metallic smell shared with Metal Mario. He felt more—connected—with Metal Luigi than with Metal Mario. Like Metal Luigi was a part of him; as if he was shaped from his rib while he slept. ML drew closer to him, giving Luigi a major whiff of those familiar emotions. The air between them felt charged, and—perhaps Luigi would save ML for last.

Then, Metal Mario’s nose slid against his nose and along his cheekbone before stopping near his ear. He heard him take deep sniffs of his own. Behind him, Metal Luigi’s breaths tickled his bangs and warmed the back of his neck. He gazed from one Metal Bro to the other, synchronizing his breathing with his metal twin’s. The smell of himself lingered as the sharp smell of steel took over. Once he drilled his eyes into them enough, then they would know. The Metal Bros would _know_ —

READY—GO!

A similar, metal-tinged tune played over the Battlefield as Metal Mario advanced toward him and Metal Luigi closed in from behind. He was tempted to do a Cyclone, but instead, he crouched down and kicked his heel out behind him, striking against Metal Luigi’s shin. There was a _ting_ as the heel of his boot made contact with the metal. He straightened then, holding nothing back with a Trowel Stab directly under Metal Mario’s jaw. It didn’t launch him far, seeing that he was metal, but that was only the beginning. Metal Luigi swung a roundhouse punch at him, but he darted to the side and answered with a body shot which opened up a Smashing combo of smashes. He wasn’t going to start dainty and work his way up _this_ time! Dealing buckets of damage was key to outsmarting a metallic opponent!

Especially when said opponent had an ally who loved him dearly. Metal Mario rushed to Metal Luigi’s defense but wound up with a low kick, and then a straight kick and then a karate chop. Metal Luigi grabbed him with his cold, cold hands and pulled his face close to his. Their shared essences mingled, and ML sniffed down Luigi’s neck, fascinated by the film of sweat covering it. He snapped out of it before Luigi could break free, pummeling him, slamming him down and doing the same fancy combos _he_ did—only a gazillion times as painful! When Metal Luigi was done with that, he worked on the edges of his opponent’s body with his karate chops, focused blistering blows on the torso and abdomen and poked his palm into the chest as many times as he could. But Luigi never wavered, even as his body was under fire. As his breath came quicker and quicker, he tore harder and harder into the gleaming incredible hulk. He smash attacked until his hands and feet hurt, and then he smash attacked some more. But then a kick to his backside sent him stumbling forward into Metal Luigi’s arms, and ML whipped him around so that he was facing Metal Mario.

MM cracked his knuckles and then let loose, hammering and slamming as ferociously as Luigi. He rolled his shoulders, arched his back and twisted his hips, but ML’s hold was crushing. MM’s fiery blows continued to plow into him. His vision blurred and blood leaked out of his mouth. Everything was swollen. Each blow echoed infinitely in Luigi’s ears. MM was just as prejudicial, his head slowly turning so that it could take inventory of Luigi. But as Luigi continued to struggle against ML’s grip, he was also taking inventory of MM. It was time to lay off of his metallic kindred spirit for a while.

Luigi saw his chance when he noticed MM growing tired. His elbow mashed into ML’s face, and half a second later, his cupped palm made contact with MM’s ear. The sudden attack left MM in a state of disorientation, which Luigi took full advantage of. It was his turn to grab, combo and chain-throw now. His knuckles were growing bloody and bruised, but his sturdy work boots stood up to metal. He started doing more breakdance sweeps until the throbbing in his hands died down. When Metal Luigi recovered, Luigi deftly worked out a pattern of aerial and ground attacks. Staccato beats. Like a choreographed dance. All of Luigi’s combos were choreographed dances, really, polished and sharpened by constant practice. And like dance, they were good de-stressors and releases. He timed his moves with those of his two “dance partners” so that they would intersect perfectly. One of their blows would deflect, or miss entirely so that Luigi could get his blows in. If the pressure got too much, then there was the Luigi Cyclone. But only once in a while, to prevent stale moves.

Not once did he let up. Through shooting and stabbing pain, Luigi resisted the temptation to switch to weaker attacks. His foes were over 120%, yet they still weren’t getting launched pretty far. He’d angle his forward smash upward or try to get them offstage so the gravity could pull them down. After engaging Metal Luigi, he noticed that no matter what, this guy would use his Green Missile to recover, even in situations where the Super Jump Punch was necessary. And just like last time, Metal Mario used the Mario Tornado and SJP a lot. If he could just get those two metal siblings to the edge…

His sissy fists rammed wildly into the steel frames, his war cry ringing through the Battlefield. Of course, the Metal Bros were silent, but they responded to Luigi’s fervent shouts by showing more and more aggression. He wanted to play rough, huh? He wanted to roll up his sleeves and get in the mud, huh? Well, they did, too! Luigi hollered furiously at Metal Mario; he hollered in exhilaration at Metal Luigi and he hollered ferociously at them both. Dense fists beat him something fierce, but they’d never break him! Fireballs began to issue forth from his gloved hands as he surreptitiously lured the Metal Bros to the edge. He had to be sneaky, because Metal Mario learned from his errors as well as Luigi, and he probably told his metal brother what to look out for, too. Luigi moved in a zigzag pattern, obstructing the view from his opponents so they wouldn’t find out that he was up to his old tricks. In between launching fireballs, he dented the Metal Bros some more with a good Trowel Stab. He could see the dents as clear as day, along with the dents from his other attacks. If they could dent, then they could be defeated! He continued to yell stridently, dancing closer and closer to the edge, and when he was a step from the ledge, he stonewalled his two opponents, attacking quickly and exaggerating his dodges to force them to overcorrect themselves. He sent Metal Mario lurching over the edge so he could see the abyss awaiting him below. And as he teetered there, Luigi did a short hop n-air which sent him into open space and topped it off with his down-air. He didn’t get the spike, but he _did_ get Mario to attempt his Super Jump Punch, which dropped him like a lead weight into oblivion. There was no scream.

Luigi and Metal Luigi both watched Metal Mario fall to his doom. Then, they gazed at each other. The flesh-and-blood Luigi spoke not a word, but raised his fists once more, his swollen eyes still flaming and crackling with spirit. Metal Luigi held his gaze as he copied the action. Luigi was aware that he was expertly balancing on the ledge, which could turn from an advantage to a disadvantage in a heartbeat. Hand-eye coordination was key. There was no margin for error. Not if he was so close to the finish.

And then Metal Luigi seemed to _smile_ as they sized each other up. Metal Luigi wasn’t like Metal Mario. Master Hand had engineered a spark of humanity in him. And for that, Luigi was happy.

“Come on,” whispered Luigi. “Come on, Metal Me. Take it. Take it all.”

Metal Luigi swung. Luigi ducked, unloaded a final batch of body blows, and then grabbed ML by the legs, swinging him round thrice. On the third swing, Luigi released his opponent and hurled him off the edge. Then, he jumped off the edge and pushed ML further back with a f-air string before recovering to the platform to inspect his work. Everything went according to plan. Being metal decreased the horizontal range of ML’s Green Missile, and on top of that, he didn’t get the misfire. He came just short of reaching the platform, and as always, he didn’t attempt a Super Jump Punch. Silently, he dropped into the darkness to join Metal Mario.

GAME!

Master Hand floated to him with a tall, chocolate Shroom Shake, just the way he liked it. “Trust me, you will need this,” he said as he handed it to the plumber.

The glove watched the motions of Luigi’s neck and throat as he gulped down the nourishing treat. His eyes glazed over in pleasure at the taste, and he didn’t stop slurping on the straw until every last drop of the Shroom Shake was gone. There was a bit of Shroom Shake and whipped cream on his upper lip, which he licked away. Then, he opened his eyes and smiled at MH. “ _Grazie_.”

MH nodded. “I thought it might cheer you up. Now, if you would kindly come with me…”

Luigi followed Master Hand to a Neoclassical styled room. Some towels, a bath sponge, body wash, a variety of soaps, shampoo, deodorant, cologne and a fresh pair of clothes waited for him.

“This is a Refreshing Station for you before the final stage of Adventure Mode,” explained Master Hand. “Here, you get the opportunity to cleanse body, face and mind. Take as much time as you need. I’ll be waiting right outside.” And with that, he vanished.

Luigi took a towel, the bottle of body wash, the shampoo and the bath sponge and proceeded to the showers. There, he stripped naked, hopped into the shower and turned on the water. MH had adjusted the temperature in advance. After soaking under the pour, Luigi got the sponge nice and lathered up and set to work. With gentle and practiced motions, he scrubbed. The dirt, blood, perspiration and the clinging memories fell away. He turned the water back on, rinsed off the dirty soap and then lathered up again, a slower and creamier lather. A dreamier lather. This was where Luigi cleaned deep, getting into the little cracks and crevices he missed the first time. The smell of the body wash and the feeling of the repeated lathers was divine. Luigi closed his eyes and sank into it, sighing and moaning. He lathered and rinsed three more times, each one more intense and pleasing than the previous, switching between the sponge and his hands, and after the third time, he took the shampoo and did the same with his hair, washing and detoxifying from ends to scalp. Sometimes, his fingers worked fast, and then, they worked slow, massaging and pinpointing. Finally, Luigi turned the water temperature to the coldest setting his skin could tolerate, rinsed away the last of the shampoo and body wash, and just stood there for the last portion of his shower. Fingers of cool water drifted down his back; jets of it spurted all over his face and then down his neck, chest, belly and hips. He tilted his head up so it could caress his hair and scalp. His breaths slackened into deep sighs. He really needed this.

He turned off the water, grabbed his towel, and stepped back out. The soft towel patted his body dry. Next, he selected from the array of soaps, took a washcloth, and pampered his face. The soap he’d picked was an exfoliating kind, and he lathered his face up with it twice. He dried his face off after the last rinse, and then he took a comb and some hair cream and fixed his hair.

Now, for the clothes. A fresh pair of cotton briefs. A baby pink shirt. Crimson overalls. Peppermint-stripe socks. Dark brown work boots. And a baby pink hat with a pink L on it. His Wrecking Crew colors.

Two swipes of deodorant for each underarm.

A spray of cologne on each wrist, followed by two on the back of the neck.

And then he was done.

MH walked back in to find Luigi waiting for him with that singular defiant expression. Waiting for the challenge.

“How was it?” asked MH.

“To my liking,” Luigi responded simply.

MH nodded. “You have ventured through the worlds of your fellow Smashers and surpassed major obstacles. You have demonstrated your continuing bonds with friends and comrades. Now that you’ve proved yourself against the Fighting Wireframes and the Metal Bros, let’s see if you can withstand the trials that await you at—the final stage!” He let out his trademark deep and sinister laugh.

Luigi stood there, straight and tall, glaring coldly at the Hand of Creation. His voice grew louder and more passionate as he spoke. “Do you really think you can sow seeds of doubt in my mind—even after I’ve come this far? Perhaps you don’t know me as well as you like to think. My courage will be tested beyond rational capacities, but I refuse to wither in the wind before any ultimate challenge! I’ve defeated you once, Master Hand, and with God as my witness, as long as there’s breath in my body, as long as there’s blood in my veins, as long as the Earth rotates on its axis, as long as the Sun and Moon hold their proper places in the sky, as long as the constellations glow, as long as the seasons change, as long as the rivers run and the oceans flow and as long as light counteracts the darkness—so help me, I’ll defeat you again!”

MH looked at the plumber whose will was as iron as the bars of a building’s superstructure. And then he laughed again.

“Why, Luigi! What makes you think that _I’m_ your final opponent? Oh, no—this final boss is going to make me look merciful in comparison!”

“Well, what I just said goes double for him,” snapped Luigi as his fire roared to exuberant life. “For those whom I must protect—I shall not lose.”

 


	22. 12-1: Final Destination

Final Destination.

Those two words alone were enough to send epinephrine shooting through Luigi’s entire being.

The stage had changed significantly in two years’ time. Instead of an octagonal, round shape, it had more of a flat, rectangular shape and a simpler design. The edges of the platform were lined with purple, and the rest of the stage was black. As before, the ambience and the background were very futuristic, green squiggles sometimes breaking up the monotony of black. The stage itself remained basic, as there were no gimmicks or hazards whatsoever. Luigi was quite pleased with the current layout of Final Destination, as he had greater freedom of movement and increased space to utilize.

Standing before him on Final Destination at the moment was none other than Luigi’s final opponent in Adventure Mode. The opponent he’d faced not too long ago, to whom he’d suffered a terrible defeat. The opponent who not only defeated him in front of Mario, Peach and the rest of his friends but also castigated him and rubbed buckets of salt into his wounds shortly thereafter, dragging him into the replay room to torture him emotionally by making him watch and by saying those words and physically whenever he dared to look away. The opponent who spent most of Melee so far bullying almost everyone on the roster alongside his Gerudo friend. The reason why Luigi had tackled Adventure Mode. The reason why he’d fought, sweated, bled and bruised his way through eleven worlds to get where he was now.

King Koopa.

And as Luigi looked at his opponent, he _knew_ —he _knew_ that the overgrown turtle was going to use their earlier battle as ammo against him. He was going to get inside his head, he was going to taunt him, he was going to get a rise out of him and try to force raw emotion to take control. But Luigi wouldn’t let that happen. He was going to fight the rage, fight the memories, fight the words. Fight his nerves, creeping up behind him from the shadows. Whatever mistakes he made that day—he wasn’t going to make them again. He was going to focus on the battle before him—the right attacks, the right combos and the right defensive and evasive maneuvers. Koopa wasn’t about to overpower him mentally—or physically, for that matter!

Koopa smirked at Luigi down the length of his snout, still sporting some bruises and aches from their earlier battle. He thanked Master Hand in his mind for this opportunity. Second helpings of the pitiful Green ’Stache—how fortunate could he get? As soon as MH told him, Koopa had given Ganondorf a buzz, the King of Evil agreeing to drop whatever he was doing to come cheer him on. He glanced over at the stands and saw him, sitting at the far left of the front row, crunching on peanuts and Cracker Jacks. He was clad in a tan jersey with Koopa’s name on it and tan gym shorts. Presently, he waved at his friend, a smirk etched on his features as he anticipated seeing more of the green bean’s blood painting a stage.

Luigi didn’t notice this; he’d completely shut it out. All he saw was his opponent, just as loaded for bear as he was. His posture was straight and tall, once again cutting a figure in his Wrecking Crew outfit. Blue eyes gave his foe the once-over, smiling internally at the leftover damage from their last encounter. He shouldn’t count out that he gave Koopa a big, big beating before things took a sour turn. He’d fought his best—his hardest—and that was all that mattered.

_But man, he was so close to winning! He should’ve won! Peach and Mario were there, and they saw him get trounced! Where did he go wrong?!_

No, don’t worry about that. It’s in the past. Yesterday. Ancient history. You can’t do anything about it. Stewing over it won’t change the events of that battle. But you _can_ do something about _this_ battle.

_That turtle—who did he think he was, saying those things to me?! I’m not a failure! I’m no weakling! And I can prove it!_

Yes, you can, by calming down and watching more carefully. Now, for the last time, stop thinking about it! Stop thinking about what he and Ganon said to you! Your anger means nothing to them—if anything, it’ll be encouragement. You can’t let their words get under your skin.

_Well, I can’t help it! They hurt me! They made me feel like dirt—useless and worthless. They played on my current situation in my own universe—left-out, zero credit, clumsy and cowardly! What am I supposed to do—let them get away with it?!_

No, L. I’m not saying that. They’re _not_ gonna get away with it. This ends today. Forever. But you need to calm down right now. Okay?

_Okay. I’ll try._

Don’t try—only do.

 _Yes_.

A heavy weight lifted itself from Luigi’s spirit as he purged it of those words, of the sight of him being used as a punching bag on the Battlefield. He sent the toxins that were his rage, his frustration and the mockery of those two far, far away, where they could no longer hurt him. He closed his eyes, feeling and hearing the rhythm of his breath, and now focused on the relaxation of his muscles. Loosen that jaw a little. Now relax those limbs. Unclench those fists. Now the chest. And the abdomen. Chest and belly worked in tandem as he breathed, focusing his attention on his navel, mentally moving the ball of energy back there, feeling the navel flex with each breath in and then relax with each breath out. His heart rate came back down to a close-to-normal range, and his brain edited and rewound every moment of that fight. The defeat itself had been discarded, condemned to the cutting room floor. But everything else—from the start to the turning point—served a purpose. Perhaps during the battle, he could figure out just where he went wrong—

 _And why did I go wrong? Why did I mess up like that and embarrass myself? Oh,_ Dio—

Focus. _Focus._

_Right. Focus—_

Luigi breathed again, a soothing breathing exercise which extinguished the fire threatening to fan out of control and burn his strategy to a crisp. His shoulders released and then rolled back. His chin lifted. His shoulder blades snapped taut. He opened his eyes and stared Koopa down. No emotion. This was his game face. His war face. He felt the soft fabric of his shirt and overalls caress his skin. He felt the intensity wrap around his body and shoot twin rays from his eyes at his adversary. He felt like a slate had been wiped clean, that he was ready to redeem himself by facing this beast once more. Lips compressed firmly—but not too firmly, and jaw locked. Allowing jaw and neck muscles to flex occasionally to prevent aches. He angled his gaze so that Koopa would be forced to look him straight in the face. His lips parted slightly as he felt cold anger sweeping down, though he was battling it back. Azure eyes gleamed brightly, dangerously, with total confidence.

_Be careful what you wish for, Koopa. Because you just might get it._

Koopa lumbered forward and held out a clawed hand. “You’d better hope Mario and the Princess are here,” he snickered.

Luigi refused to grace that statement with a response. Instead, he grasped the proffered claw and silently shook hands with him. His eyes could say enough. So could his blows.

“Quite a grip you’ve got there, Greenie,” chuckled Koopa. “What’s the matter? Still sore over last time? Well, too bad, because I’m gonna make you go through that again. And again and again and again and again…”

He trailed off as he saw a strange illumination creep over Luigi’s body. So intense was his focus and his optimism that they cast their light upon his already golden skin. And then there was the flamingo-pink hat and shirt and the Twizzler-red overalls and—were those green sparkles dancing on him?

“Mad now, aren’t you?” the reptile snorted. “That’s fine; see if I care. By the time I’m done with you, Mario and the Princess—you’ll _really_ have something to be mad about. GWAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!” He laughed and laughed and laughed, calming down only when he saw Luigi refusing to play into his claws.

He huffed. “Fine. Let’s get to it.”

_Okeydokey. Say your prayers, you ignorant fiend._

READY—

The energy thrumming around deep inside his navel, coupled with the warmth inside his chest, was so good to feel. Luigi didn’t even take his eyes off of Koopa as he raised his fists.

GO!

His fists shook, just a little bit, but then they steadied as Koopa ran toward him.

_He deftly flicked fireballs from his right hand even though his body screamed at him to charge…_

Luigi read what Koopa was doing and calmly dodged, rather than meet the charge head-on. Koopa was sent into confusion as his claw met air. Confusion which turned to pain as “sissy-fists”, a brutal forward kick and a knifehand thrust met him. Luigi then executed a short-hop and kicked below him, feeling his opponent’s hair and the tip of his horns touch his hipbone. He smiled inside as the meteor-smash connected. Koopa was on the floor. Again, Luigi kicked him. In the face. Harder than he’d ever kicked anyone in Smash. And then a low kick. A hollow crunch as heel met bone. Thank God for premium-grade work boots. Another short hop and an intricate chain of karate chops. Forcing him off the stage. But Koopa knew what Luigi was trying to do.

_Luigi had instantly punished Koopa’s impatient charge with a barrage of furious, vicious punches. He stunned him with a flip-kick, grabbed him, and slammed him down, the first throw of the match. Eyes followed Koopa as he tried to DI, and he greeted him during his descent with another down throw. And then more of them._

Koopa’s Whirling Fortress disrupted Luigi’s combo as it recovered him back onto the stage. Luigi picked himself up and sent out fireballs with his left hand, his right hand slightly beckoning to Koopa in a “come and get it” gesture. His tongue peeked out over his upper lip and then retreated back into his mouth. He was worried that Koopa was starting to catch on to his strategy, but then he thought back, just for a moment, to how low he thought of him. Just as he predicted, set off by the sight of this green bean standing tall against his might, Koopa roared and aimed a running dropkick at him. Luigi dodged, grabbed, threw him up and dealt out some painful flip kicks before switching to quick karate chops and finally another d-air when his breath started to come fairly fast. Koopa slammed hard onto the stage, only to be grabbed and slammed back down by Luigi, over and over.

_Luigi, thanks to steadfast practice, had become polished in neutral. After his chain-throw of Koopa, he next forced him to sample a stinging combo. He comboed his f-airs into fastfall u-tilts, which came out pretty rapidly. With a simple flick of his wrist, he could clobber his enemy from overhead. Or, he could shoot out fireballs when the pressure got too much. And at any point during a combo, he could re-grab and begin again…_

A handmade necklace had small beads, medium-sized beads and large beads. One could make different combinations of these three beads. Luigi liked to think of his combo tools in the selfsame fashion. The first bead—the combo starter—was a large bead, which was either an up or a down throw. His small beads were his weaker attacks—his jab, his L-cancelled jab and his “sissy-fists”—and his spacers—his fireballs and strong side attack. For his middle beads, his other strong attacks and all of his aerials fell into this category, especially those which could chain into themselves (karate chops, anyone?). And finally, his large beads consisted of his Smash attacks, his Super Jump Punch and his Green Missile, as well as a combo-ending option or a re-grab. Chain-grabs could also qualify for a string of large beads.

But like all necklaces, no two were alike, and they were subject to flaws in their design. Sometimes, beads had to be removed and strung all over again. Koopa eagerly and expertly exploited those flaws, except that he wasn’t making necklaces. He was simply throwing things into a blender and mixing them together, hoping to come up with something palatable. Still, his size and strength were nothing to laugh at. Blood lazily drooled from the wounds his claws, spines and horns left on his body, peeking through the overalls of the same color. Already, he was peppered with bruises and swollen places, and there was pain everywhere. Additionally, he miscalculated and wound up in the dreaded Koopa Klaw. He was either grabbed and chomped on repeatedly, the agony exploding tenfold with each bite, or slashed into the air or hurled down. If he was thrown after the Koopa Klaw, Luigi was able to stop combos in their tracks, stun with fireballs and steadily guide his way back onto the offensive like a boat to shore.

_Koopa’s frustration was so amusing to see, because it wasn’t like it was gonna get him anywhere in this match! Here, Luigi would hold his position and stay on guard, even as the adrenaline overcame his body and he could take no more, he would wait, breathing, taking in his wounds, taking in the sticky blood dripping down his face and sliding into his mouth like his sweat. Here, the energy ball at his navel would recharge, growing back to its original size, as Koopa fumed. Roaring, the turtle charged, but Luigi’s kick intercepted him, leading to a free Cyclone, a quick chain grab and a longer combo which moved from air to ground and back again. The d-air was the ideal air-to-ground transition, while the re-grab was the perfect ground-to-air transition. Each hit came out on a specific beat, establishing a cadence Luigi worked well with, making his energy last a good while._

Luigi found himself slammed down by Koopa’s down special, prevented a follow-up with an air-dodge and quickly regrouped, rolling up his sleeves. Koopa could see some muscle on the green bean’s arms, and look—a sports watch! Oh, he was something else with that sports watch, wasn’t he? He’d show him. He’d show him good…

The plumber read his mind and set his face, waiting for the frustration and the blind charge. Then, the possibility of stale move negation occurred to him, so he tried a different tactic. He danced lightly on the balls of his feet, around the stage, around Koopa. If he kept standing there, _waiting_ , then Koopa would figure him out, right? Luigi didn’t want that, right? So, he had to be on the move.

As Koopa tried to track Luigi’s movements, the man in green rapidly darted out of the turtle’s line of vision, and—misfire! The Green Missile knocked Koopa onto his belly, which Luigi didn’t really want, because that was the most vulnerable area of his body. So, he tiptoed close, and with a bashful kick, popped Koopa upwards before sending a series of flip kicks into that fleshy tummy. And then— **PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG**! The center of that tummy fell victim to a Fire Jump Punch!

But it wasn’t enough to KO this big lug. Oh, no. It was time for Luigi to pull out all the stops now. These next necklaces were gonna be plentiful in large beads, maybe even larger beads for fully charged Smash attacks. Luigi grabbed a lungful of air and went to work. First, distract with fireballs. Then, go for the throat and grab him. Slam him down. Let him have it with the Smash attacks!

_Sometimes, he aimed his Trowel Stab straight. The diagonal trajectory in its wake was fertile with follow-ups. But angling it up hurt more, and he’d jump to catch Koopa in a full-on Cyclone. Koopa’s air mobility left something to be desired, so it was hard for him to air-dodge or DI in time. On rare, and I mean rare, occasions, Luigi aimed his forward smash down in order to do a grounded combo._

His up smash was mainly a hard read. He baited Koopa to roll right into him, and POW! He didn’t use this too much, for it caused headaches, and he didn’t want to scramble things up there, did he? So, he stuck to his breakdance sweep and Trowel Stab, following up with aerials and fireballs to peck away at his massive foe.

Koopa inhaled and sent bright orange flames Luigi’s way! Luigi dodged with a “Whoa!”, his first interjection in battle. He retreated until the Fire Breath spurted out, and rather than run back in, he let loose with a fiery assault of his own, lime green flames searing into Koopa’s hide until he put up his shield.

Yet before Koopa shielded, Luigi caught something in his eyes. Glee. Glee over him crying out as he dodged his Fire Breath. He was standing there, laughing at him with his green eyes! But Luigi got even by continuing to throw out fireballs, resisting the temptation to march up there and jam fiery fingers into those laughing eyes, shield-pressuring him. The shield shrank and shrank, and when it was no bigger than a small child’s ball, Luigi generated a slightly larger fireball and launched it, breaking the protective bubble.

There was a sound like shattering glass, and Koopa went flying into the air before toppling back down, clutching his head and growling. The shield break had left him dizzy. Luigi wasted no time gawking at him. In seconds, he dashed to the disoriented reptile and lit into him, pounding him as savagely as he’d been pounded that day. _Now_ he could launch an open hand stab into those eyes. _Now_ he could make him regret smirking at him as he did. Just as quickly, he snapped himself out of those thoughts. He had to think about his game plan, not about revenge, or he’d lose a second time to this monster.

_Luigi made a fiery fist, pivoted his body and shot it directly into Koopa’s side, doing the same to the other side. He nearly gasped as the shock wave resonated deep inside his body like strings on a lute. Koopa doubled over, and thus couldn’t see Luigi charging himself up, mustering all of his willpower to deliberately get a misfire. And he got it. Heat flashed all around him as he flew across the Battlefield, a plume of fire trailing behind him. The top of his head, softened by his cap, made contact with Koopa’s belly. It was like popping a balloon, the air leaving his adversary in a rush, crumpling him. Luigi dropped low and swept his legs around, and then laid on more Smash attacks before deciding to switch things up and set up an aerial combo._

Luigi cupped his palm, swung it in a precise arc and slammed it into Koopa’s ear, followed by the same hit to the other ear. Koopa’s eyes rolled back for a few seconds as discombobulation swept over him; at the same time, Luigi jumped and landed a strong flying kick to his face. Right into one eye he aimed a sharp, swift karate chop. Plus, several more at the base of the chin. On the inhale, he jumped, and on the exhale, he twirled his feet in that familiar way, timing things carefully so he’d get yet another meteor-smash. And he got it. Horns and hair gently scraping his hipbone, the downward twirling kick colliding with the top of Koopa’s head. The monster was now between a rock and a hard place—and at the mercy of Luigi’s ground attacks. After laying on some short hop aerial attacks, he misfired into Koopa’s battered face, deciding to switch things up and set up a grounded combo.

_And oh, how he yelled as he continued to drive in his blows!_

How his violent shouts tore loose from his throat!

 _It was as if fireworks were going off inside his body_.

He was a volcano wanting to erupt, but he couldn’t; he couldn’t give in to the rage now because that was a weakness. If Koopa saw that he was remembering, then he’d start in on him.

_Koopa tucked into his shell and spun at him, but Luigi rolled to safety._

His combos were cut off with the Whirling Fortress. After taking the attack, Luigi tried to tech, but Koopa noticed and punished with a down smash. Luigi covered his retreat with his fireballs.

_Luigi moved to the edge of the stage and baited Koopa to use Whirling Fortress again, only to dodge at the right moment. Koopa, in a helpless state at the end of the move, dropped off the stage and lost a stock._

The toxins threatening to cloud rational thought were now being expelled from him as Luigi released more defiant cries. He fought defensively till he managed a hard read on Koopa—then resumed his offensive attacks as if nothing happened. _Dio_ , how he yelled! Taking notice of the pain pounding into him, he maintained a greater space between the two with his strong side and his amazing, gravity-defying fireballs. His eyes skimmed over the battered form of his monstrous opponent, mentally patting himself on the back as he did.

And then, in an exploding moment of clarity—

_He figured it out!_

_HE NOW KNEW WHERE HE’D FLUBBED!_

_He had surveyed the bruises and blood covering his opponents and allowed himself a brief smile. Koopa had been filled with an unimaginable anger at this and let loose with his Fire Breath. Thinking quickly, Luigi had vaulted over Koopa, only to find himself in his mighty claw!_

Letting his guard down for a single instant was all it took for victory to turn into defeat.

He wasn’t going to let that mistake happen again.

Stay focused. Stay alert. The battle’s not over until he’s beyond the blast line.

Molding his features into a neutral expression, Luigi got Koopa to approach him once more and hammered away at him like never before. Now that those jeering words had stopped replaying for once, he could look upon that match with fresh eyes. He’d started off with his head in the game and his eyes on the prize—but veered off when he smirked at Koopa’s wounds, with catastrophic results. But which prize was his eyes on—victory or respect? Which was more important? Luigi hadn’t been in Smash to win—he’d jumped at the opportunity to make new friends and hopefully climb out of the rut of being Player Two. Then, he reasoned—perhaps he let his longstanding rivalry with Koopa get to him in those brief seconds, and the turtle took full advantage.

But not today. Luigi had always learned from his mistakes—and that was certainly the case after losing a Smash battle. And when Koopa looked into Luigi’s eyes, he quickly figured _that_ out, too.

Still, it wouldn’t hurt to rattle him some more.

Grinning, Koopa executed his Koopa Klaw attack one last time and got in a few big bites before Luigi wrenched himself free, got into position and executed his trademark fiery uppercut. This mighty Super Jump Punch was punctuated with an equally mighty war cry. Koopa roared in dismay as he was ejected into oblivion.

SUCCESS!

Luigi calmly watched Koopa plummet earthward in trophy form and disappear into the darkness.

Then, a feeling of triumph overtook him.

“I did it!” he cried, striking a victorious pose. “Let’s-a go!”

Then, he heard a deep chuckle from Master Hand. “Who said this stage was finished?” boomed the glove.

“What? I beat the final boss, fair and square, didn’t I?”

Luigi watched in disbelief as the Koopa trophy floated back up and onto Final Destination.

“You didn’t actually think I was gonna make the final boss _that_ easy, did you?” challenged MH.

“If you’re trying to intimidate me, then it’s not working,” Luigi said levelly. “I have spent weeks upon weeks upon weeks training for this moment, awaiting the day when Koopa and I once again came face-to-face in combat. There wasn’t a day when his words weren’t echoing in my ears or when I felt his mocking gaze on my back. When he mocked me, I made a quiet vow—that he would never break me! He may slash me with his claws, roast me with his Fire Breath, chew me up and spit me out with his Koopa Klaw or put me down with cruel words—but he’ll never break me! I swear to God—he’ll never break me!” He whirled on the Koopa trophy. “You’ll never destroy me, you understand?!” His voice echoed all around Final Destination. “You think you decimated me that day?! Think again! You think I can’t take you on a second time?! Think again! Two years ago, I took on the godlike Hand of Creation after toiling my way through eleven battles! He made me bleed all over myself and the stage—just like you did—but in spite of his awesome power, I overcame him! He saw the vibrant glow of my fire! He heard the resounding _crack_ of my blows against him! _And on that day, he looked into the whites of my eyes and he realized what I could do—by the sweat of my brow, by the strength of my back—by the courage of my heart!_ I’m standing here, Koopa, and I’m telling you that even if I have to bleed again and again and again and again— _I will overcome you_!”

MH chuckled again. “We’ll see about that.”

A bolt of lightning struck the Koopa trophy. At the same time, Ganon, in the stands, raised his arms. Luigi heard loud cracking sounds from around him as the trophy began to reanimate—and grow.

“What are you up to, Master Hand?” he murmured.

Koopa’s claws, horns and shell spines lengthened and sharpened as he grew. His shell color darkened, as did his skin tone. His hair became spikier, his snout became less rounded, and his eyes—bloodshot, feral and soulless. He stretched out his less-bulky arms as life and energy returned to him.

“Mamma mia…” Luigi had seen this form of Koopa before—a form engineered only to maul and destroy. A form of Koopa which would be significantly more difficult to beat.

Giga Koopa.

The inflated beast’s eyes suddenly focused on Luigi and lit up demonically and hungrily as he caught the plumber’s scent. His mouth opened, and from it came a roar putting to rest all doubts of his newfound bloodlust, a roar which drowned out Ganondorf’s laughter.

Prepare yourself, Luigi, for the ultimate test of mettle!

 


	23. 12-2: Giga Koopa!

“ _Dio_ ,” breathed Luigi as Giga Koopa’s demonic eyes pierced through him. It was as if he’d been cast into the Ninth Circle of Hell. The abomination towering before him was the ultimate embodiment of evil, the creature occupying the worst nightmares known to man. Luigi’s heartbeat throbbed against his ears as he glared at Giga Koopa, straight and tall, shoulders back despite the fearsome presence.

“GWA-HA-HA! Let’s see you scurry your way out of this!” chortled Giga Koopa as he lunged at the man in pink.

But Luigi stood his ground, his mouth a thin line beneath his moustache. He raised his fists—a bit shakily—but his azure eyes indicated his commitment to this final battle. Strength surged from his stout heart and into his bloodstream. His strident battle cry pierced the silence as a fully charged forward smash met Giga Koopa’s charge. The ultimate clash between the villain and the cowardly hero had begun!

Watching the two exchange blows from his seat in the stands, the King of Evil smirked. He hoped Luigi would enjoy the secret ingredient he’d added to the final boss of Adventure Mode. If Master Hand learned of it, though, then he’d be in serious trouble! But seeing Final Destination drenched in Luigi’s blood would be worth whatever punishment the Hand of Creation meted out to him!

Meanwhile, Giga Koopa’s transformation had failed to achieve the desired effect on Luigi—or he was trying to hide it. His face was hard, solemn and determined, his strong shouts echoing across Final Destination, as he concentrated his mightiest attacks on Giga Koopa. It was as if he was battering a rock. His opponent didn’t flinch or wince in the slightest. Still, Luigi wouldn’t give up. There was a strategy in place against Giga Koopa. Offensively, he’d spare nothing with his smash attacks and powerful special moves. Defensively, he’d use fireballs and strong attacks. He sidestepped a blast of Fire Breath and returned with an explosive misfire into Giga Koopa’s chest. The beast smoldered, yet he took the hit without toppling off his feet, a cruel smirk on his lips. Fists up, breathing deeply, Luigi waited for Giga Koopa’s next move.

And he didn’t have to wait long. Giga Koopa lunged and slashed a clawed hand forward, only to wind up slashing air and taking a vicious forward smash to the torso, followed by another and another and another. Luigi landed his spearhand strike all over the monster’s fleshy underbelly and finished the combo with a breakdance sweep, and then a strong side to space Giga Koopa out. The beast tucked into his shell and spun at Luigi, but the pink-clad plumber easily vaulted over him. As soon as the move finished, Luigi slammed him hard with a Fire Jump Punch, another breakdance sweep, an up smash, several open hand stabs to the jaw and face, a flurry of f-airs and finally an aerial Cyclone. He fast-fell into a quick barrage of fireballs as he strategized over how to pounce next. Then, inspiration struck. He allowed Giga Koopa to go on the offensive and used the open space to try and evade the strikes, helping himself to quick damage points using his fast roundhouse and aerial kicks and chops. Giga Koopa went in for a grab, but that was what Luigi had waited for. He read the grab attempt, dodged and landed a string of Cyclones on him, topping it off with a d-air. Then, he switched gears and unleashed his most violent and painful blows, blows he knew were reliable K.Os. But Giga Koopa laughed them all off.

“Is that all you’ve got?” he crowed. “I’ve been hit harder by a…”

But the insult fell on deaf ears. Luigi concentrated his focus on his battle plan and his offensive and defensive techniques. Every villain like Giga Koopa had a weak spot—somewhere—somehow. They weren’t invulnerable or super-armored for long. They were intimidating and put up a great fight, but they were beatable. As Giga Koopa continued to jeer, he wasn’t paying attention to what Luigi was up to, allowing the plumber to sneak a misfired Missile into the center of his belly. This would’ve winded him, but to Giga Koopa, it was a pitiful little tap. Luigi ducked under hammy fists and let loose with more smashes, determined to get that damage up and to prove this fiend wrong once and for all. His hands and limbs started to ache, yet he continued to keep going. He had to!

Giga Koopa suddenly snatched Luigi in the Koopa Klaw and pulled him up to his fearsome face!

“You’re no match for me, Greenie,” he sneered. “What makes you think you can win if I’ve beaten you before? You made a mistake to challenge me. A big mistake.”

 _Chomp. Chomp._ _Chomp. Chomp_.

“If only you had your friends to save you. Looks like they’re busy with _other things_.”

Giga Koopa continued to chomp away at his pink-clad opponent before throwing him down and body-slamming him.

Luigi got up quickly and stared down Giga Koopa. “What makes you think I need to be saved?” he challenged, aiming a mighty kick at the beast’s jaw.

“Oh, you think I’m blind? You think I didn’t see you crying a river to your friends because I beat you? They really laid me out to dry when I was pitted against them.” Giga Koopa laughed off some more of Luigi’s attacks and delivered several brutal claw swipes to his face and chest. “Did you not inform them that this was on your agenda? They would’ve turned out to support you from miles around. But do I see any of your friends here? No. They know that no matter what you try, I’ll beat you up all over again.”

 _Ignore him. Ignore him. He just wants to get to you._ Luigi clenched his jaw as he shot some more fireballs, threw fully charged smash attacks and leaped at Giga Koopa for flying kicks and chops. He attacked harder and harder, but nothing seemed to work. Giga Koopa was a nigh impregnable titan!

With a deep, menacing laugh, Giga Koopa blocked Luigi’s next attack and cannoned a leathery fist into the plumber’s face. The man in pink had barely scrambled back up when Giga Koopa brought down his massive fist over and over. Final Destination trembled with each devastating blow. Agony exploded all over Luigi’s body, but he willed himself not to scream. His blood smeared Giga Koopa’s fists, which only intensified his ferocity. After smashing Luigi a few more times, the beast decided to really have some fun and pounced on him shell-first, drilling into him with his spikes. Volts of electricity issued from the spiky shell and into the body below him. Luigi rallied with punches and fireballs, but Giga Koopa could take it in spades. He gripped the plumber in a crushing hold, pummeled him several times with fiery horns and then took several fiery bites out of him before violently pinning him to the floor.

“This is going to hurt—a lot!” promised Giga Koopa, his claws flashing menacingly in the light.

He pounced on Luigi then, slashing and ripping into him with claws, spines, horns and fangs infused with dark magic, electricity and fire, respectively. He forcibly slammed his larger body onto Luigi’s over and over. He continued to punch his pinned foe with his meaty fists, excited by the claret-red blood drooling from the wounds he inflicted and leaking onto the purple floor of Final Destination. He was on top of the word; invincible! This meager plumber hardly left a dent or a scratch on him! Thank goodness for godlike gloves who understood what he was going for here! He’d always wanted to turn Giga in Smash—to remind the other Smashers who was the mightiest of them all. Now—he was going to have more power than he could ever imagine! Whenever Luigi tried to escape, Giga Koopa read him as hard as his shell and re-captured him with the Koopa Klaw, biting like the animal he was, raking at every inch of his face and then concentrating his strikes on Luigi’s chest and ribcage, the crimson overalls darkening as he drew more blood, spreading like wings all over the pink shirt, running into his hair and hat and gloves. Luigi’s mouth was clenched shut, his eyes still blazing, continuing to struggle against Giga Koopa, refusing to let his opponent see his pain, even as blood dribbled from between his lips and the beast’s blows grew unbearable. Giga or not, Luigi wasn’t about to lose to him again!

“C’mon, Greenie! Let’s see some more of those fancy strategies and hard reads! I dare ya!” chortled Giga Koopa as he picked up Luigi and spun around with the plumber balanced on his shell, the spikes cutting and tearing everywhere. Luigi tried to roll away, only to be punished with a down special. A Whirling Fortress collided with him then, forcing him toward the edge of the stage. Luigi managed to throw a fireball at the base of Giga Koopa’s foot when he tried to stomp him. As Giga Koopa yowled and hopped around, Luigi picked himself up and peppered him with surprisingly powerful Smash attacks, impulsively spitting a mouthful of blood into Giga Koopa’s face. The monster blinked a few times before calmly wiping it off and ended the pink clad plumber’s offensive streak with a massive dropkick to the chest.

Luigi lay on his back, gasping, the wind knocked out of him, his limbs wobbly. Gobs of blood drooled from his wide-open mouth and his nose. And then Giga Koopa towered over him, belching out a plume of fire. Bright orange and red flames enveloped the being on the floor, so intense that the spectating Gerudo King had to shield his eyes. He was shocked and outraged to discover that the man in pink was still holding on after that fiery assault. What a stubborn string bean!

And as Giga Koopa looked at his foe, he laughed and stomped him hard with his good foot. “I must say, that was very clever,” he spat, “but it’s over, Green Stache. It’s all over. I really wish all of your friends were here, so they could watch as I tear you to shreds a thousand times over. They deserve it, and that’s the truth.”

Stomp. Stomp. Slash. Slash.

“I’m surprised, though, that your beloved brother hasn’t shown up yet. Just wait till he and Peach see what I’m doing to you now. They’ll finally see how useless and pathetic you are! GWA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAA!”

Slash. Stomp. Again and again and—

“You’re wrong.”

Giga Koopa hesitated. “What?”

“You’re wrong, Koopa.”

A fiery fist smashed into Koopa’s left flank.

The pain started to register within the giant Koopa. “How dare you?!” he roared, wincing.

Luigi rolled to his knees, calmly let fly some fireballs, and then stood. He was completely dissociated from the pain of Giga Koopa’s sadistic strikes. “How dare _you_?” he retorted, bravely approaching his enemy and sidestepping when he tried to knock him down. “How dare you try to cut me down even though we both know you can’t? How dare you automatically assume that I’ll fold just because my brother isn’t by my side? How dare you act like you own the place—how dare you disrespect me, my brother and my fellow Smashers?”

POW! Luigi speared his hand hard into Giga Koopa’s chest.

“You couldn’t have been more wrong about the situation and about me. It’s not over. Not yet. Not until I say so.”

Luigi smash attacked again and again, as hard as he could tolerate, sweeping his legs, knifing his hand, slamming an occasional up smash—and then he switched to sharp aerial attacks, readjusting his battle plan, now focused on building damage on the incredible hulk. By now, the plumber was covered in bruises and blood, tracking the latter all over the stage as he once again moved fluidly, attacking ferociously yet strategically. He left the face alone for a while and went for the fleshy underbelly, plunging Trowel Stab after Trowel Stab into it, using his down smash to punish a tech, kicking him solidly in the chest and in or near the ribcage. He noticed that Giga Koopa was finally starting to hurt, as if Luigi’s attacks had gained power. And they were, with each passing second.

“You’re wrong about something else, Koopa,” Luigi said darkly. “Mario, Peach and everyone else _are_ with me. Not in person—but they’re with me!” He scored a vicious volley of blows to Giga Koopa’s face once he’d sufficiently doubled over. He made Giga Koopa flinch, wince and grimace. That was a great sign.

“I feel their strength inside me! I feel their spirits! I feel their words and their hearts and their power and their wishes! I hold them in my heart, and thus I feel them! And what do you hold in your heart? Absolutely nothing! Your heart is nothing but blackness—you only think of taking and taking and never giving back! But I’m not as weak and wimpy as you’d like to think! I may not be as fearless as Mario—but I’ll never lack in courage!”

Luigi crouched down and let fly a glorious misfire into the center of Giga Koopa’s chest, knocking him back a few inches.

“You can punch me!”

He swung and landed a blow to the snout.

“You can kick me!”

His roundhouse kick cracked Giga Koopa’s jaw.

“You can slash me up!”

A Trowel Stab to the neck.

“You can throw me around!”

One—two—three karate chops to the face.

“And you can burn me!”

Fireball after fireball met various areas on Giga Koopa’s body.

“But I swear by the Stars that you will not, shall not and cannot break me!”

Luigi battered him with a short-hop Cyclone.

“I lost to you, and you wanted it to deflate me—but it didn’t! I am a Phoenix, Koopa! I rise from the ashes! And though your words twisted the knife of defeat—they inspired me! They were the reason why I dutifully woke up at six each morning and resist the urge to sleep in for a mere minute! They were the reason why I worked and trained harder and harder—why I kept practicing my skills till I could do them in my sleep! You boosted my will to keep trying and trying until I finally got it right!” The man in pink whaled away at Giga Koopa as he spoke. “Sometimes, I heard your jeers at night. Sometimes, I came close to believing what you said to me that day. But I prayed that someday we’d meet on the battlefield again—so you could see the error you made in underestimating me! You’ve sowed that day—and today, you’re going to reap!”

Giga Koopa got a claw strike in, but Luigi hardly felt it, plowing more fiery fists into that bulky frame, beating him like a Sandbag. He jumped and landed a successful d-air spike before resuming the barrage of Smash attacks.

“Why do you persist, Greenie?” growled Giga Koopa. “Why bother getting up every time I knock you down? What do you need to prove by fighting me—that you’re not a wimp? Or are you fighting for someone—your brother or the Princess? I’ll get my hands on her eventually—and you and Mario will never see her again! Your puny resistance is futile. Why won’t you just give up?”

“Because,” breathed Luigi, “I fight for a just cause—a cause I believe in. You fight for personal gain and power—but I fight for the safety and security of my people! And I’ll never cease fighting until the threat you pose is gone for good!”

“So be it,” snarled Giga Koopa.

The two ran at each other again, Luigi landing his blow first, immediately launching into one of his combos, going for the throat, now seeing a K.O. on the horizon. His injuries hardly mattered anymore. His energy replenished with each attack he threw. He wasn’t going gently into that good night. Even when all hope seemed to be lost, he continued to believe in himself, to think about the hurdles he’d jumped over to get to this battle and rage against the obstacles hindering him now. Just like in 1P Mode, all sorts of random doubts and fleeting urges to retreat tried to drag him back, but he muddled through them, just like he muddled through the cruel voices of Ganon and Koopa trying to entangle him. And Master Hand had hit him with everything he had, but his body stood strong through it, just like it stood strong through Giga Koopa’s enhanced attacks. There was fire inside of him, keeping the shadows at bay and motivating him to fight on through another day. And no one, especially Koopa, no matter how large he grew, was going to snuff out those flames! This fire in him burned brighter and hotter, reflecting in his eyes and in his voice as he shouted passionately.

_You can do this, L. You can do this. You have to keep going—you have to keep fighting!_

Giga Koopa rammed his massive head into Luigi, sending him to one knee and then clawed him in the side. But Luigi drew himself back up.

_You’re never gonna break me, Koopa._

Crouching low, Luigi kicked out his heel into Giga Koopa’s kneecap before straightening and throwing a spin kick. Giga Koopa tried to retaliate, but Luigi was ready for him with fireballs. The monster tried to dodge, but his size made him slow and sluggish, and he fell victim once again to Luigi’s most painful attacks. He was beginning to bruise and bleed. His super armor had begun to weaken. And he also noticed that the dark magic effects, fire effects and freezing effects were fading as Luigi forced him into a defensive stance. Either he was growing weaker—or the man in pink was growing stronger!

_L—you’ve got this. You’re gonna beat him!_

_**You sure are!** _

_Wha—who said that!_

_**It’s just like you said—we’re right behind you, L! We believe in you!** _

Luigi was overjoyed. It was the voices of his friends, rallying him, girding him, keeping him strong despite the pain in his body. He allowed himself to remember the cheers sounding through the stands on the Battlefield that day, the spirited cries of encouragement floating down and answering his own exclamations. How they had turned out in numbers, some bringing their friends along, for the sole purpose of showering Luigi with much-needed support, knowing that facing down a massive turtle would require an emotional boost. How they had worn green or hoisted brightly-colored signs, chanted his name, broke out “the Wave”. How they’d sat through the match from start to finish when they easily could’ve done other things in that time period. And how, even after he lost, they continued to stand by him, cheering him up and pointing out that even legends made mistakes sometimes. They reminded him of his earlier impressive victories and still considered him a formidable force in Melee. Thanks to them, he’d recuperated and recovered from the loss and emerged ready to try, try again!

_**You’ve got this, Bro! I know you do! I’ve seen you during the times we battled him together, and I can honestly say that I could never beat him without your help! You may have lost that day, Bro—but he didn’t defeat you!** _ **Sei un sopravvissuto! Puntare in alto! Non mollare! Si tu puoi! Ho fiducia in te!**

_Standing there on the Battlefield, Luigi had met Mario’s blue eyes and saw the concern and confidence in them. For a moment, his face had relaxed, a smie had spread across his features, and he’d offered his big bro a quick, reassuring wink._

_**You are not worthless or weak. Remember that. It was only one month ago that you saved my life even though I know you wanted to run. You faced your biggest fears—for me. And if you can beat your fears—then you can beat Giga Koopa.** _

_**He’s right** _ **.** The Princess’s soft, dulcet tones joined in.  _**You can do anything, once you put your mind to it. Didn’t you tell that to little Ness once? When I watched you that day, I wasn’t looking at a coward. I was looking at a man who never lets anything crush him. Don’t let that monster crush you! Stand and fight! Show him who’s boss!** _

_Peach held Mario’s hand as they watched the two combatants stare each other down. Luigi’s wink and broad smile had reassured her along with her love. Of course, she didn’t count on him losing, but did it really matter? You couldn’t win at everything—losses were what helped you get better, not victories. She’d always remember the look of commitment on Luigi’s face and the way he never shied from Koopa’s intimidating glare—despite his fists shaking a little bit when he raised them. As Dean shouted the start of the match, Peach blew a kiss down to the man in pink._

_**Do it! Just—do—it! I know you can, and you know you can, too!** _

_You’re right, Princess. I know I can. If I can beat Master Hand and the King of all Boos, then I can beat Giga Koopa!_

_**Mario told me what you did in that mansion. And all I have to say is—if you were truly a coward, then you would’ve left him to fend for himself. But you didn’t.** _

Then, Yoshi’s happy voice floated in as Luigi knocked Giga Koopa off his feet.  _**Yoshi!** _

_The green dino had sat next to Mario that day, watching Luigi with glittering eyes. What had stuck with him, besides Koopa’s post-victory rant, was seeing Luigi dig in his heels even when he found himself at a disadvantage. And loss or not, Luigi had cared for Yoshi after he’d hatched from an egg. No matter what, Luigi would always be his mommy!_

_**Yoshi!** _

_You’re right, Yoshi. I’ve been the best mother you’ve ever had. I’ve protected you and loved you. And I always will..._

He smiled internally as he heard DK’s voice giving a motivational speech in ape-speak. Though they got off to a rocky start, the tie-wearing simian had never underestimated him, especially upon seeing his prowess in various sports. DK was also historically a low-tier, a predicament which Luigi understood all too well. Seeing him in the stands, wearing a green tie and rooting for him, had been further proof that he’d changed his ways.

_DK had made himself comfortable in the center row, guzzling on bananas, erupting in spirited ape cries as Luigi’s adrenaline erupted on the battle stage. And after the loss, DK had taken a loaf of banana bread up to Luigi’s room to cheer him up. The King of the Jungle would spend the next few days breathing down Koopa’s neck. Too bad it didn’t unnerve him—_

Luigi dodged another hammy fist to the head and went in with a series of karate chops and jabs, finishing with a blinding smash attack. Giga Koopa leaped into the air and performed his down special, crashing down hard onto the plumber. As Luigi struggled back up, trying to reorient himself, a familiar, strident voice rang in his ears.

_**The winds of courage are strong in you, L! Farore will protect and defend you! I don’t care what that turtle says—you’re still one-half of the Green Team. You’re tough. You’re gritty. You’re titanium. And you never—ever—back down!** _

The Green Team. Luigi had coined that moniker for him and Link two years ago while awaiting a Team Battle atop Hyrule Castle. Something about the name stirred something in them both, and not only did they beat the opposing team, they continued to partner up for future team clashes.

_**Nobody is ever without fear—and it’s okay to be afraid. But nobody is without courage either, and I know that despite your fears, you can rise to any challenge. But fear not—I’ll always be by your side!** _

_**And so will I. So far, I have enjoyed fighting alongside and against you. I can tell that this is something that you’re serious and passionate about—but that you also like to relax a bit and have some fun. You’re nothing like the prima donnas that come here to just beat up people and win. You know that there’s more to the table than winning.** _

Zelda had known that respect and appreciation were more important to Luigi than winning. Yet at the same time, she knew that Luigi hoped to make a statement by winning against particular people. Like Koopa, for instance. He’d wanted to show that turtle that he had to fear him as much—and maybe more than—Mario. But when he lost, Koopa was convinced that he’d always be weak. Luigi had spent the weeks since training harder and dreaming for a rematch to prove him wrong.

_He could still hear Zelda and Link, sitting together one section to Mario and Peach’s left, cheering and chanting in Hylian. Though Luigi didn’t know a word of Hylian, he could tell by the tones and cadences in their voice that they were sounding a war cry. His mind supplied the blast of Hylian horns and the deep booming of Hylian war drums, further stirring him into action against his smug foe._

_And then Zelda had visited him afterwards, giving him advice and calming him down, knowing that he wanted to barge into Koopa’s room and let him have it for what he’d said to him. She’d encouraged him to wait it out, to reflect over the day’s events, to decompress and to practice. There would be an opportune moment to release that aggression—and today just wasn’t the day. Thanks to Zelda’s wisdom, Luigi was able to cool off, look upon the match with fresh eyes and realize where he’d erred._

_**Taking your prey requires patience and skill** _ , the last of the Sheikahs chimed in.  _**You must stalk the prey, read the prey, become the prey—confuse the prey and trick him into dropping his guard. Your prey won’t know until it’s too late that he’s fallen into your trap.** _

Soft lyre music rose into his stormy mindscape, and Luigi could imagine Sheik’s eyes studying him from under her veil, contemplating the sight before her. She had to be one of the most level-headed Smashers here. When Zelda’s advice wasn’t enough, then she’d turn into her alter ego and offer some more wisdom, with a dash of tough love.

_**You can defeat this beast, L. I’ll be right behind you every step of the way...** _

_Thank you, Sheik—_

_**You can thank everyone else, too, ’cause we’re not going anywhere!** _

_Sammy! It’s you!_

_**If you can beat me with my hi-tech armor and weapons, then you can beat Godzilla here. I have faith in you, L. We all do. Now show him who’s boss!** _

_Samus had immediately announced her support for Luigi, with her green top, green headband and green and white nails. He’d noticed her craning her neck, studying him intensely, as he psyched himself up. He’d heard her hardcore cheers, glimpsing her waving a green scarf, during the battle. And after he lost, Samus had offered him tips on how to cope with crushing, humiliating losses, drawing upon personal experiences. They seemed to help, but Luigi really couldn’t wait to get his hands on Koopa again._

_**There were times during my missions when I felt I couldn’t go on, too. But after the first Smash tournament, I started thinking of you during those moments. Know why? ’Cause you’re amazing under pressure. You keep your head high and your eyes fixed on your goal. And you hang tough and never let go. Kudos to you, L, for never letting go.** _

_Yes. I’m hanging in there. I’m never letting go. I’m soldiering on and fixing my eyes. And my eyes are fixed—on beating this menace! I can do this! I can—I can—I can—I CAN!_

_**Hii!** _

_Kirby—_

_**Poyo! Poyo, poyo poyoy popoyo poy poyo, poyo! Poyo—poy poyoyo popoyo poyoy, poyo, poyo, poyo, poyo po poyo, poyo! Poy! Poyoyo! Poyo, poyo poyo! Popoyo, poy! Poyo!** _

_Of course, Kirby._ Luigi was honored to be considered a positive role model to the little fluffball. Since he’d been in his predicament two years ago, he was going to draw from that experience and provide Kirby with the tools he needed to survive. He remembered Kirby listening, wide-eyed, as Luigi told him stories of the battles he’d won in spite of the odds, of the fighters he’d stood up to and of the friends who rallied to his cause like he was doing now. And when Luigi walked in on Kirby at his lowest point—he’d confessed to his own moments of darkness, when he’d been tempted to do what he just caught Kirby doing, but what good would come out of that? From then on, Kirby immediately dropped everything and ran to Luigi whenever he felt like he was drowning. And in return, Kirby made sure to attend all of Luigi’s matches.

_Kirby’s cheeriness was just what the doctor ordered when Luigi arrived to battle Koopa. He sat between Jiggs and Pikachu, “poyo”-ing and waving his appendages, the childish joy back in his eyes. He was so happy to have brought back Kirby’s carefree attitude, the sense of accomplishment further amplyfying his confidence. And after the loss, Kirby had given him a nice-sized slice of cake. Yep—he was back to his old self, or close to it!_

The puffball’s cheery voice continued to permeate his mindscape as he danced about Final Destination, facing down Giga Koopa and giving no quarter with his blows. He landed Trowel Stabs on critical areas on the hulking body. He dodged or shielded against Fire Breath. He smashed hooks all over the body and face. He defied the glinting claws, glittering fangs and shiny spines. And he yelled and hollered his throat raw, hurling dares toward the beast at the top of his voice.

_**Believe it or not, I’ve always rooted for you** _ , intoned Fox’s voice.  _**Even when I was poking fun at you, I knew deep in my heart that you were capable of more than I could ever imagine. When I was up there, watching you, all I could think was, “Wow, how come you’re not top tier?” You’ve risen through the ranks, but you’ve stayed modest and humble, and for that, I truly admire you. I may be a bit of a jerk to you sometimes, but I respect you.** _

_**Me, too. C’mon—we’re both Brooklyn babies! Sure, we’re the top dogs of Melee, but we know defying the odds when we see them. And you, buddy, are definitely defying the odds.** _

_Fox—Falco—I can’t thank you enough..._

_**Don’t mention it...** _

_The two reps of the Star Fox team had been clustered with the other Melee Elite, sharing nachos. Falco had lifted a wing in salute to Luigi—one Brooklynite to another—and Fox had waved. Luigi had returned the latter with a curt nod. It was great that Fox was cheering for him—but it didn’t change how he continued to consider himself a “Melee God”. But gradually, he found his anger ebbing as he released boatloads of tension on Koopa. And after Koopa had taunted him, Fox had begun to lay off his own cocky attitude, offering to spar with the plumber on rough days._

_**Pika, pika!** _

_**Pichu, chu!** _

_**Puff! Jigglypuff! You’ve got this, L!** _

In spite of everything, in spite of the unexpected feud erupting between Luigi and Pikachu, the Electric Mouse still had the plumber’s back. Pichu had sided with Pikachu out of loyalty, but in reality, he couldn’t bring himself to hate Luigi. The two of them had cheered for the man in green, not for Koopa, during that dramatic battle. And Jiggs—though she was on Melee’s “A List”, she was still one of the Formidable Four, and she’d never forget that special bond with Luigi.

_**Yes! Show him ya moves!** _

Falcon. What was Luigi going to do with him? Even as he remembered the cocky yet encouraging smile on the racer’s face as he sat beside Samus, he also remembered his behavior and his  _words_ during the first tournament, the mixed emotions giving him even more energy to unleash on the now-staggering Giga Koopa.

_**What I said to you that night was wrong, L. I can’t lie about that. I guess I let my rankings get to my head. But all of that’s in the past now. I’m a new man, a changed man. A man who believes in you and who knows you can send that big, bad Koopa running for his mommy! Keep fighting the good fight, and remember, I know you can do it! You’re the backbone and the spine of the Formidable Four, anyway! You can make that spirit live, breathe and jump again! Don’t let Koopa’s words rule you—confront them! Fight! Win! Yes!** _

_**When I look into your eyes, I feel like I can do anything,** _ Ness’s voice whispered in Luigi’s ear.  _**From day one, you’ve inspired me to keep going, to pay no attention to what everyone else thinks about me. After you beat Master Hand, you told me that if I put my mind to it, then anything is possible. I want you to know that I’m praying for you, and so are Jeff and Paula and Poo. Recieve our prayers, and gather strength from them!** _

_**I believe in morning sun** _

_**Always gonna shine again and** _

_**I believe a pot of gold** _

_**Waits at every rainbow's end, goes** _

_**I believe in roses kissed with dew** _

_**Why shouldn't I believe the same in you?** _

 

_**I believe in make-believe** _

_**Fairy tales and lucky charms, and** _

_**I believe in promises** _

_**Spoken as you cross your heart, oh** _

_**I believe in skies forever blue** _

_**Why shouldn't I believe the same in you?** _

 

_**You may even say I'm a fool** _

_**Feelin' the way that I do** _

_**You can call me Pollyanna** _

_**Say I'm crazy as a loon** _

_**I believe in silver linings** _

_**And that's why I believe in you** _

 

_**I believe there'll come a day** _

_**Maybe it will be tomorrow** _

_**When the bluebird flies away** _

_**All we have to do is follow** _

_**I believe a dream can still come true** _

_**Why shouldn't I believe the same in you?** _

 

_**You may even say I'm a fool** _

_**Feelin' the way that I do** _

_**I believe in friends and laughter** _

_**And the wonders love can do** _

_**I believe in songs and magic** _

_**And that's why I believe in you** _

 

_**You may even say I'm a fool** _

_**Feelin' this way about you** _

_**There's not much I can do** _

_**I'm gonna be this way my life through** _

_**'Cause I still believe in miracles** _

_**I swear I've seen a few** _

_**And the time will surely come** _

_**When you can see my point of view** _

_**I believe in second chances** _

_**And that's why I believe in you!** _

_**Remember, L—if someone messes with one of us, then they mess with all of us!** _

_Ness had brought his three friends along that day. Luigi recognized Jeff by his mop of blond hair and his glasses. Beneath his teal jacket had been a Kelly-green T-shirt. Paula’s hair was arranged into two pigtails, and she was clad in a green and white ensemble accentuated by darker green ribbons. And Poo wore a simple green cotton tunic. Ness had worn his usual striped shirt, denim shorts, sneakers and red baseball cap, but he’d had the letter L with a white accent painted on both cheeks. All four kids held a green-dyed Mr. Saturn in their laps, occasionally waving them about as they cheered. It was as if Luigi could feel their well-wishes flowing into his bloodstream!_

This time, well-wishes from the majority of the Smash roster poured in from every corner, charging Luigi like the Energizer Bunny. Electric sparks danced through his system and ran in currents along his bruised body, and he focused those currents to create a new energy ball sitting at his waistline, right atop his pelvis. He breathed, moving it up to its regular place at his navel, and he kept it there, kept it growing and growing, as he glared fiercely into Giga Koopa’s eyes and threw his remaining might into his already powerful attacks.

_**We love you, Lu! We know you can do it!** _ The Ice Climbers sang out.  _**You’re almost there! Can you almost taste it?** _

Indeed, Giga Koopa was barely hanging on. Only a few more blows would send him beyond that blast line! But like any villain, he wasn’t going down without one last fight. He held nothing back with his claws and shell, still managing to trap Luigi in a pin or a Koopa Klaw from time to time. The pain was so much that the plumber almost went limp. But he knew he couldn’t. He sucked in his breath and breathed through each attack dealt against him, fighting defensively, using his strong side to poke through a shield or push him away, searching for an opening. And eventually, he’d find one.

The pink clad man’s body was screaming at him to quit as his life’s blood continued to escape, but he dared not. Not while this hulking monster stood before him. Said monster was also covered in bruises and blood, but his attacks were still strong. Luigi wouldn’t rest until his tormentor got his just-desserts. And with the voices of his friends rallying behind him, there was a chance that he would.

In one ear, Marth’s soft, somewhat breathy voice exhorted and encouraged in Japanese. In the other, Roy’s boyish but sure voice further spurred him on with words as fiery as his Sword of Seals. These two swordsmen didn’t cross his path during Adventure Mode, but they, too, had showed their support that day.

_**You told me of your perilous adventure to rescue your brother. You told me that people don’t take you seriously enough. But I’m not among them** _ **,** Marth assured him.  _**Don’t be afraid, for I’ll be right here. Everything will be all right.** _

_**Hey, don’t forget me!** _ Roy chimed into the other ear.  _**Don’t forget about everyone else, either. Listen to them! Listen to their voices, replenishing you, reminding of what makes you heroic in your own right! Listen to them, praying for you and chasing away your fears and the shadows of doubt! Listen to them, giving their energy to you and letting you know that you’re in their hearts, even though they can’t watch this battle in person! Listen, L—listen!** _

_**WE LOVE YOU, LUIGI!** _

_**YOU’RE NUMBER ONE!** _

_**YOU’RE COOL!** _

_**YOU CAN BEAT THAT MONSTER IF YOU BEAT MASTER HAND!** _

_**WE’RE NOT GIVING UP ON YOU!** _

_**WE’RE NOT ABANDONING YOU!** _

_**YOUR PAIN IS OURS! YOUR JOY IS OURS!** _

_**WE’RE A FAMILY HERE—WE’LL WEATHER THIS TOGETHER!** _

_**HANG IN THERE, LUIGI!** _

Hundreds—thousands—millions of voices in Luigi’s head—not bad, but good—not discouraging, but empowering! They rekindled the expiring embers of his determination and brought him from the brink of exhaustion. Their voices were in his voice as he continued to shout in the heat of battle. And whenever those pesky negative feelings threatened to creep back in, he’d remembered the numbers who turned out to watch him make a stand against Koopa. He lost, but he’d made a statement that day—he wasn’t so easy to take down! And as long as he had his friends—losing a match didn’t hurt so bad!

And with one, final spirited blow, Luigi sent Giga Koopa crashing onto his back. As stars swirled around the beast’s head, his opponent marched over and roughly grabbed his tail.

“Don’t you see, Koopa? All of this time, my friends were with me, encouraging and inspiring me! And what did you have? Your claws? Your shell spines? Your fangs and horns? Your minions? Your pal, Ganondorf? You thought all of that could take me down? You were wrong! I have the power of friendship on my side! The unwavering loyalty of the friends I’ve made in Smash defies your dark magic and might! I think of them in each battle I fight! I remember what they’ve done for me—and that’s what helps me survive! Your words hurt—they cut me—but I healed and I got back up, thanks to my friends! They are the lights in my life and the lights making my spirit glow! I cannot thank them enough for how they helped me see how wrong you are about me. I get scared easily, that’s true—but I’ll never back down from a fight! If you want to take me, then you’ll have to kill me! I’ll never bow, bend or break to your will!  _I’ll beat you a million times over, or perish in the attempt! Because no matter what you throw at me—FRIENDSHIP ALWAYS WINS!”_

Grunting with the effort, Luigi hoisted Giga Koopa off the stage and began to swing him like a merry-go-round. He started off slow, but then he picked up momentum and speed, pivoting on his heels as the two of them continued to twirl together. Giga Koopa clawed at the air, but Luigi’s grip on his tail was like a vise and only tightened in response. Finally, when the massive turtle was at the proper velocity—

“I’m-a Luigi, number one! And nothing crushes me!”

With this final declaration, he released Giga Koopa, sending him rocketing off Final Destination and into oblivion.

SUCCESS!

_Thank you—my friends_ , thought Luigi as his foe, trophified once more, dropped into the darkness like a stone, shattering into pieces like a stone.

“I got you,” Luigi said softly. Then, his voice shot up. “You spiteful, hateful, bullying monster! I got you! I got you! You almost destroyed me! Your words deprived me of decent sleep for days afterward! But it’s over! For you! You’ll never bother me like that again, you hear me?!  _Never again!_ ” The pain from the battle finally began to register, the last of his fury extinguishing forevermore. “Never again. Never again…”

“Very well done, Luigi,” said Master Hand as he floated over. “Of course, I counted on Ganon tampering with my mechanics. I genuinely wanted to see what you could do.”

Tears shone in Luigi’s eyes. “Did you really think I could beat him?”

MH smiled. “Just like you said to Ness that day—nothing is impossible, if you put your mind to it.”

“Thank you, Master Hand,” Luigi said in a jerky voice. He then gazed toward another area of the stands, where everyone else had been sitting all along. “Thank you all. For believing in me…”

His eyes glazed over, his knees gave out, and he collapsed, thoroughly spent, onto the floor.

“I’ve got him,” said Master Hand as he gently scooped up Luigi and carried him away.

 


	24. Game Clear!

_Two weeks later…_

Once again, the Seating Area was filled to capacity. Its occupants sported green in some area on their body. Green shirts, green bottoms, green dresses, green hats. Even green wigs, green jewelry and green makeup. Some even dyed their hair green, got their faces painted and sported temporary tattoos. Concessions were hopping, selling hot dogs, garlic fries, cheese fries, chili fries, popcorn, peanuts, caramel corn, sodas, cotton candy, ice cream, pizza, candy and “lotsa” spaghetti. The roaring crowd nearly drowned out the sounds of battle below.

“Go, Luigi! You can do it, Luigi!” the Smashers cheered as the man in green took on arguably one of the toughest Event Matches in Melee—Event 51. He was pitted against three villainous powerhouses, Giga Koopa, Ganondorf, and the psychic Pokémon, Mewtwo. They were no top tier fighters, but they were still quite powerful and held nothing but scorn and contempt toward their green-clad challenger. All fighters had three stock, and there was no time limit.

Luigi had been fighting against the trio for over an hour, and the damage he racked up on the three was quite impressive. Still, between Giga Koopa’s heavy blows, Ganon’s dark magic attacks, and Mewtwo’s telekinetic attacks, he was in danger of losing one of his stocks. He’d just managed to take a stock from Mewtwo, with Ganondorf possibly next. Giga Koopa remained the hardest to KO, and it seemed that he wanted revenge for being trounced during Adventure Mode.

As he battled, Luigi remembered the Smashers before him who had unsuccessfully attempted Event 51. He’d been in the front row, alongside Peach, on the day Mario had faced off against those three. The red-clad plumber had barely escaped the encounter alive. Neither had Kirby, or Peach, or Link—or his other friends, for that matter. Not only had they been reduced to beaten, bloody heaps, but also they had been humiliated—forced to grovel and beg for the sinister trio’s mercy! But Luigi wouldn’t grovel to them. He’d never beg from them! And he wasn’t about to capitulate to them!

Sidestepping Mewtwo’s Shadow Ball, he grabbed the psychic, pummeled him several times and then hurled him into Ganon, knocking them both to the floor. Giga Koopa covered them with his Fire Breath and charged forward, but Luigi dropped to the floor and swept his legs around, halting the attack. He immediately dashed forward and piled on his smashes, aerial attacks, Cyclones and some Missiles before taking the monster’s first stock with a hefty Trowel Stab. Giga Koopa was a tad easier to work with now that he wasn’t backed up by Ganon’s magic.

Speaking of Ganon, he delivered a brutal Warlock Punch to Luigi’s face, sending him sprawling onto his back. He struggled back up, only to be rewarded with another Warlock Punch to the body. The Gerudo King chuckled as Luigi coughed up blood and paid for it when a get-up kick attack met his jaw. Before he could recover, Luigi had him in a savage chain-grab and Smash attack combo which made fireworks explode in his head. With an angry yell, the plumber took Ganon’s first stock with a Super Jump Punch.

Then, Mewtwo came at him, ready for more, and Luigi reset himself, keeping his explosive emotions in check. They danced wildly all over his face, but they’d only hinder him in battle. Instead, he focused them inward, converting them into energy and self-motivation. Aware of Mewtwo’s Confusion attack, he didn’t use fireballs on him. Instead, he spent a while working the psychic with strong attacks and watching carefully for that Disable move, which disoriented him. He _did_ use fireballs to prevent Giga Koopa and Ganondorf from rushing to Mewtwo’s aid, though, deciding to isolate the three to make them easier to beat. Mewtwo tried to Teleport to different areas of the stage, but Luigi managed hard reads on him, greeting him with an up smash or a down smash. Sometimes, Mewtwo would telekinetically throw Luigi to one of his allies, who would use the surprised man as a punching bag until a forward smash brought the offensive streak to an end. He’d batter multiple opponents with his Cyclone and quickly decide which one to go for next based on the damage percentages and the stock remaining for each fighter. Mewtwo was in danger of losing his last stock, but Ganon and Giga Koopa were slow and more susceptible to Luigi’s combos. He’d quickly weigh possibilities in his mind before deciding to combo up on Mewtwo. Mixing Smashes with karate chops and flying kicks. Chain-grabbing and chain-throwing him. Taking dangerous, telekinetic moves such as Disable, along with tail lashes, Shadow Balls, electric attacks and strikes with dark auras. Continuing to keep the other two separated and at bay. After Misfiring into the psychic Pokémon, Luigi took his second stock with a b-air.

He moved in on Ganondorf then, making him pay for the fast one he’d pulled two weeks earlier. Though Ganon’s dark-magic fueled blows were nothing to laugh at, his mobility was subpar at best, and his jump height was pitifully low. Luigi got him with short-hop aerial blows, mainly his spiking d-air and his chain-grabbing and throwing skills. He styled plenty of impressive combos on the King of Evil. But Ganon rallied against this plumber with his downward stomping kick, his flaming axe kick which broke shields, all of his Smash attacks and all of his special moves. His Warlock Punches made Luigi’s vision blur for a few seconds. His Dark Dive had an electric effect to it. His Gerudo Dragon was enhanced by dark magic. And his Wizard’s Foot could propel Luigi across the stage. One of his favorite things to do was to chain grab with his up throw before smashing him into the floor. He’d try to hurl him into the trajectory of an ally, but Luigi kept them perfectly spaced. He also caught on to what Ganon was up to and quickened his pace, landing rapid, long-range strikes before closing in with heavier attacks. Eventually, a misfired Missile claimed Ganon’s second stock.

The Green Missile had also struck Giga Koopa, hurtling him off the stage. Luigi wasted no time in setting up a Fence of Pain with his f-air. Once they were far enough from the stage, he spiked him with his d-air, causing him to plummet helplessly off the stage. Luigi recovered to the platform with another misfired Missile, ramming into Mewtwo as he charged a Shadow Ball. But Ganon lifted his leg and brought it down hard on Luigi with an explosive blast, sending exquisite pain shooting down his nerves. Giga Koopa stepped in with a double-claw strike and a vicious double-footed kick, causing Luigi’s mouth to go slack briefly. Before Mewtwo could add to the mix, Luigi straightened and raised his fists, a little pale and dribbling blood but slicing into them with his eyes. Ominously, the trio closed in on him.

For a quick moment, Luigi retreated into his thoughts, checking in with his body and assessing how much more damage he could take before suffering a stock loss. Then, he focused on the cheering around him, imagining the sea of green-clad spectators filling up the bleachers, rather than a sparse crowd like he expected. He picked out Mario’s voice, hollering in Italian, Dr. Mario doing the same. There was Peach’s voice. DK’s ape sounds. Link and Zelda with another Hylian war chant. Even Sheik, intermittently, yelling in Sheikah. Samus whooping. Yoshi chortling. Kirby’s high, cheery voice yelling “Hii!” or “Poyo!”. Fox and Falco chanting Luigi’s name. Pichu, Pikachu and Jiggs squealing over the plumber facing a powerful Legendary. Falcon cheering as if for his favorite sports team and still exhorting Luigi to show moves. Ness, this time bringing Ninten and Ana along with Jeff, Paula and Poo, the psychic kids cheering their heads off. Nana and Popo rhythmically knocking their mallets together in a “clapping cheer”.

“Gimme an L!” _Knock-knock._

“Gimme a U!” _Knock-knock._

And so on till they spelled Luigi’s name.

Finally, were Marth and Roy, spewing all sorts of motivation in Japanese and English.

Luigi closed his eyes. Listened to the cheers. Listened to the support. And breathed, deeper and deeper, tasting sweat mixing with blood. And reflected. Reflected on everything he’d been through over the past few weeks—or the past two years, for that matter—and how the surge of power from his friends, from his brother and from deep inside himself helped him survive.

Under his breath, he whispered, “ _Dammi la forza una volta di più_.”

His eyes flashed open, glaring defiantly at Mewtwo, Giga Koopa and Ganondorf. He was at home stretch—the trio only had one stock remaining! With a yell leaving nothing to the imagination, he launched back into battle, knocking the three away with a Cyclone and then dealing with them one by one. First up was Giga Koopa, who Luigi lit into with smash attacks while evading wild claw swings. Finally, he laid him out to dry with an impressive Super Jump Punch. Mewtwo seized him and hurled him into the air, but Luigi DI’d to safety and rammed him with two misfired Missiles before grabbing his tail and slamming him all over the platform. This led to an aerial combo culminating in a third Green Missile, rendering the Legendary psychic down for the count.

Now, only Ganondorf remained.

There was apprehension in the Gerudo King’s eyes, apprehension which he tried to shove away with a derisive sneer at his opponent. But Luigi met the sneer with a face like granite, dukes up, fists and breathing steady. His and Giga Koopa’s days of bossing around the other Smashers were over.

“This is what you get for trying to cheat,” Luigi said tightly before knifing his hand into Ganon’s collarbone.

Ganon roared indignantly and threw a Warlock Punch at him. The blow missed, but Luigi still felt the powerful shockwave, almost toppling him off his feet. Regaining his balance, Luigi pivoted and rocketed a hook into the side of Ganondorf’s face, followed by a blow under the chin and straight punch to the face. Next, Luigi fluidly spun and kicked Ganon hard in the chest before landing five aerial chops on him, plus a strong Cyclone. After blindsiding him with sissy fists, Luigi switched to Smash attacks and throws, sensing the finish line ahead and knowing that he couldn’t waver now. He heard the crowd exploding into a frenzy. He heard his own exclamations, blazing and echoing every which way. He heard his heartbeat. He heard his breath blasting hotly from between his lips. He heard his blows making contact with his opponent. He heard Ganon’s cries of pain and dismay. And he heard the small voice in his head, telling him that he was going to do it!

Finally, Ganon violently thrust his shoulder at Luigi, sending him reeling. He then reached out to grab him, but Luigi nimbly leaped aside. Offering Ganon one final hard look, Luigi summoned his last ounce of strength, wound up, and exclaimed:

“Checkmate!”

The Smash attack collided with Ganondorf, launching him skyward. The King of Evil screamed pitifully as he tumbled into endlessness.

SUCCESS!

The crowd leapt to their feet, screaming madly. They tossed Luigi flower bouquets, Fire Flowers, Stars and Mushrooms.

“Yeah! You did it, Luigi! You showed them what for, Luigi! You’ve won a gold medal, Luigi!”

Heat rose to Luigi’s cheeks. Humbled by such an outpouring of adoration, he lowered his head and softly kicked the ground, tears of joy springing to his eyes.

**Well I thought I knew you, thinkin' that you were true  
Guess I, I couldn't trust called your bluff time is up  
'Cause I've had enough  
You were there by my side, always down for the ride  
But your joy ride just came down in flames cause your greed sold me out in shame**

**After all of the stealing and cheating you probably think that  
I hold resentment for you  
But uh uh, oh no, you're wrong  
'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do, I wouldn't know  
Just how capable I am to pull through  
So I want to say thank you  
Cause it**

**'Cause it makes me that much stronger  
Makes me work a little bit harder  
It makes me that much wiser  
So thanks for making me a fighter  
Made me learn a little bit faster  
Made my skin a little bit thicker  
Makes me that much smarter  
So thanks for making me a fighter**

**Never saw it coming, all of your backstabbing  
Just so you could cash in on a good thing before I'd realize your game  
I heard you're goin' round playin', the victim now  
But don't even begin feeling I'm the one to blame  
'Cause you dug your own grave  
After all of the fights and the lies cause you're wanting to haunt me  
But that won't work anymore, no more,  
It's over  
'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture  
I wouldn't know how to be this way now and never back down  
So I want to say thank you  
Cause it**

**'Cause it makes me that much stronger  
Makes me work a little bit harder  
It makes me that much wiser  
So thanks for making me a fighter  
Made me learn a little bit faster  
Made my skin a little bit thicker  
Makes me that much smarter  
So thanks for making me a fighter**

**How could this man I thought I knew  
Turn out to be unjust so cruel  
Could only see the good in you  
Pretended not to know the truth  
You tried to hide your lies, disguise yourself  
Through living in denial  
But in the end you'll see  
You won't stop me**

**I am a fighter and I  
I ain't goin' stop  
There is no turning back  
I've had enough**

**'Cause it makes me that much stronger  
Makes me work a little bit harder  
It makes me that much wiser  
So thanks for making me a fighter  
Made me learn a little bit faster  
Made my skin a little bit thicker  
Makes me that much smarter  
So thanks for making me a fighter**

**You thought I would forget,  
But I remember  
'Cause I remember  
I remember  
You thought I would forget,  
But I remember  
'Cause I remember  
I remember**

**'Cause it makes me that much stronger  
Makes me work a little bit harder  
It makes me that much wiser  
So thanks for making me a fighter  
Made me learn a little bit faster  
Made my skin a little bit thicker  
Makes me that much smarter  
So thanks for making me a fighter!**

**LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL**

Luigi stood in the Reception Hall, his tears finally spilling as his blue eyes scanned the cheering Smashers. They came with more flower bouquets, balloons, ribbons, glitter and confetti, most of it green. Koopa, Ganon and Mewtwo sulked a good distance away, but they hardly bothered Luigi now. A hush fell over the room as Master Hand floated over, a trophy in hand.

“For outstanding heroism, perseverance and commitment in the face of adversity, both on and off the battlefield, it’s my pleasure to present you, Luigi, with your personal Smash Red trophy!”

“Thank you so much!” Luigi said tearfully as he accepted the trophy. “I had to fight and bruise and bleed _a lot_ to get to this point. But I don’t think I would’ve made it if it weren’t for you all. Thank you—for staying by my side.”

The man in green examined his trophy. It showed him in his usual green getup, arms crossed behind him as he did his shy dirt kick. Impulsively, Luigi brought it to his lips, unable to contain his feelings of closure and vindication. He’d freaking _done_ it. Despite what Koopa thought, Luigi had shown him that he was far from pathetic and useless and gave him and his friend, Ganondorf, a run for his money. He was as super as Super Mario, and anyone who thought otherwise should try their luck against him in a Smash Battle.

Attached to the trophy was a piece of paper which read:

_“Luigi has worse traction than his brother, but he’s a more powerful jumper. His fireballs aren’t affected by gravity, so they fly straight horizontally. The Green Missile is similar to Pikachu’s Skull Bash, but there’s a 12.5% chance of a spontaneous misfire. Luigi’s taunting pose inflicts minor damage.”_

Bringing his trophy to his lips once more, Luigi walked out of the reception hall, sent off by the applause of the majority of the roster. He brushed past Koopa and Ganon without even looking at them—he _defied_ them to ruin this moment—and headed straight to his bedroom. He locked the door, opened the curtains and windows, and placed the trophy on his nightstand, gazing at it admiringly. Finally, he slipped off his boots, took off his hat, climbed into the bed and rewarded himself with a much-needed nap.

**LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL**

Koopa sat in the Smash Lounge later that night, sipping a Scotch, when Ganon sidled up next to him. “Mind if I join?” he asked.

“Sure,” smiled Koopa. He turned to the bartender. “A strong one for my friend, if you please.”

The bartender nodded and fixed Ganon a drink.

“I can’t believe this,” sighed Koopa.

“Believe what?” asked Ganon.

“That Greenie beat me—twice,” huffed Koopa. “Who does he think he is?”

“I have to hand it to you—I didn’t expect him to beat me, either,” Ganon softly admitted. “And when I cast that magic on you—I thought his situation was hopeless.”

The bartender handed Ganon his drink, and the Gerudo King instantly knocked back a quarter of it.

“I was beaten by a coward—in front of a full house, no less,” Koopa went on. “I thought I made my point clear when I creamed him that first time. And yet he had the audacity to challenge me?”

“Well, I guess it was bound to happen,” sighed Ganon. “I could see it in his eyes whenever we picked on him.”

“What do you mean?” frowned Koopa, confused.

“It’s no secret—the Smashers were simply waiting to see us fall,” explained Ganon, “and after what we said to Luigi, he was a ticking time bomb. Our defeat by his hands was inevitable from the word ‘Go’.”

Koopa took another sip of his drink and ordered another one. “There’s more to that green ’stache than meets the eye, isn’t there?” he asked after a while.

“Indeed,” nodded Ganon. “Too bad we had to find out the hard way.”

“Well, he _did_ save Mario from that mansion,” murmured Koopa, “and man, you should see him at our kart races and sport events! It’s like it’s in his blood!”

“You cause trouble for Peach, and yet she lets you compete in sports?” asked Ganon.

“There are moments of peace between us. It’s complicated,” shrugged Koopa. “Man, Greenie sure packed a punch!”

“Well, has it occurred to you that there’s more depth to him than just a timid, overshadowed brother?” asked Ganon. “Sure, he’s shy and quiet and terrified of ghosts, but there are a lot of things that you don’t know about him. He genuinely wants to make friends and have a good time. He wants to prove that he can be heroic in his own right. He will fight and perform to the best of his ability when needed. He’s the most dependable person I’ve ever met.”

Koopa sighed heavily. “You’re right. He’s not just some second-rate Mario.”

“I could see that he was nervous, a little scared,” Ganon went on, “but his eyes—they were more than just windows to his soul. They made it clear that he was going to stick this one out. No matter how much we intimidated him—he was going to fight us through to the end, even if it meant getting seriously injured—or worse.”

“Amen to that,” nodded Koopa.

“I mean, look at Link,” said Ganon. “He’s an elf boy at first glance, but he’s also a remarkable swordsman, an expert archer, a master of artillery—and a mean ocarina player and equestrian. And it’s obvious that he loves Zelda dearly and will do anything to help her. Zelda, too—she’s smart, beautiful, maternal and knows magic off the top of her head. I can’t count those qualities out when I’m scheming against them.”

“Well, I can’t disregard Green Bean’s assistance to Mario when we’re locking horns,” Koopa said softly. “He’s a good man—and a good brother. Green looks good on him, too—but don’t quote me on that.”

“Let’s make a deal,” said Ganon. “Let’s stop thinking of excuses to pick on our green-clad nemeses and at least try to take them seriously. Because believe me—they’re powerhouses when they want to be.”

“You said it,” nodded Koopa. He raised his glass. “To the Hero of Time and the Eternal Understudy—the greenest and worthiest of underestimated foes.”

Ganon smirked. “Cheers,” he said as he clinked his glass with his pal’s.

**LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL**

“What brings you here, Master Hand?” asked the mystery man as he greeted the Hand of Creation in an undisclosed area.

“Luigi’s adventure in the mansion surely changed him for the better,” said MH. “It allowed him to withstand insults from King Koopa and Ganondorf. But two weeks ago, Luigi went on another adventure. Here are some highlights from it.”

MH inserted a videotape, and he and the mystery man watched silently as Luigi braved perils from eight worlds before squaring off against Koopa in his regular and then his Giga form.

“Wow,” breathed the man.

“Not only that, but also he became the first Smasher to clear Event 51,” said MH.

“Against Giga Koopa, Ganon and Mewtwo?!”

“Yes.”

“Master Hand—is there anything Luigi can’t do?” the mystery man questioned in wonder.

“I’m asking the same thing,” replied Master Hand.

“But I think that there’s more to your visit than showing me video clips,” the mystery man said knowingly.

“That is true,” said MH. “Given Luigi’s accomplishments in Melee, it’s time to expand his role in Mario’s adventures—make him more than the sidekick. Just imagine the fantastical things he can do out of loyalty to his big bro—cure him of strange illnesses, venture with him through his archrival’s innards, team up with his baby self, fight alongside him in battles—even create a version of himself out of his best dreams who can grow to titanic proportions to get his bro out of danger! Just imagine!”

“What do you have in mind this time?” asked the mystery man.

“Why make a Mario game when you can make a Mario _and_ Luigi game?” proposed MH. “A single-player Mario and Luigi game which incorporates hand-eye coordination, puzzle solving and turn-based play into hours of RPG fun?”

“A Mario and Luigi single-player RPG game? That’s a good idea!” smiled the mystery man. “But—what do you want in return?”

“Since the first tournament, I have worked on a vessel which will help my Smashers unlock their true powers,” said MH. “I could use some help in putting the finishing touches on it.”

The mystery man smiled and shook MH’s hand. “Sounds like a deal,” he said.

Master Hand smiled hugely. The road to Luigi’s next adventures had begun!

 

**Author's Note:**

> Translation: I'm ready.


End file.
